(Ian) Yeah, I play cellphone games 'cause I'm hardcore.
(Anthony) SHUT UP!
(video game beeps)
Hey, you know how I've been searching for my real dad
for the past eight years?
Well, I think I finally found him!
(video game beeps)
-What're you doing?! -Playing Flappy Bird.
That game looks dumb!
I would never play that.
(video games beep)
Ugh! This game fricking sucks!
Holy crap, dude! The game gets super deep
once you get past a thousand pipes.
Like, right now Flappy Bird's getting revenge on the hunter
who killed his father.
20 unproductive minutes later...
No! Flappy Bird has a failing heart.
Now he has two days left to live!
Come on, Ian! You can do it!
You can make it through the first pipe!
Did you just talk to yourself in third person?
No.
F*CK!
Oh, thank god! Flappy Bird's kickstarter fund raised
enough money to buy him a new heart.
Oh, uh, sorry for the spoilers, bro.
23 completely wasted and utterly useless minutes later...
F*CK THIS GAME!
I'm deleting it forever.
Flappy Bird just found the magic stone and saved
the fish people!
Now the fish princess can take her rightful place
on the magic throne of destiny!
Cooool.
NO ONE GIVES A SH*T!
Oh, thank god! His baby twin survived.
He's really a woman?!
-That explains everything! -(sighs)
I didn't know there would be a sex scene in this game.
Dude, get the hell outta here!
-Ooh! It's a lesbian sex scene! -Really?!
Uh, yeah, but if you want to see it,
you gotta get to it yourself!
Fine! I'm gonna get to that lesbian sex scene
if it's the last thing I do.
♪ He's beating it ♪
♪ He's beating it so hard to the lesbian sex scene ♪
♪ He's beating it hard ♪
♪ He's beating it, ooh ♪
♪ -He's beating it so hard to the lesbian sex ♪ -- -Let's do this!
♪ He's beating it hard ♪
♪ He's beating it, ooh ♪
♪ He's beating it so hard to the lesbian ♪--
He got his new heart!
The fish queen!
My god, the twins are so cute!
So he is a girl!
Which means...lesbian sex--
oh my god!
(Flappy Birds grunt and moan)
It's better than I imagined!
Hey, Anthony! I made it to the lesbian sex scene!
Whatever. No one cares about that stupid game anymore.
What?! You just played it, like, six hours ago!
(scoffs) Come on, man. Where you been?
It's all about Rubby Bird now!
-(quacking) -Keep rubbing the bird.
Good job.
Well, you know what? You're just jealous because
I'm making it way further than you ever made it in Flappy Bird!
Wait...what are those two flappy birds doing
with that one cup?
Oh no! No, don't do--don't do that!
Oh, god! (vomits)
After word got out about the horrific final scene of Flappy Bird,
the game was immediately removed from the App Store.
Rest in Peace, Flappy Bird.
Just kidding! F*ck that game!
To see behind-the-scenes footage and bloopers,
click the video right over there!
They're lipstick lesbians!
Lipstick lesbian birds have bald beaks.
Ian, I just put my phone with Flappy Bird installed on E-Bay!
And to see what happens when we actually tried
to play Flappy Bird in real life,
click the other video on the right.
Fun, fun, fun!
We're all gonna be completely silent.
-CUCKOO! CUCKOO! -Be the bird!
My god, dude, the bid's already up to $50,000!
If you want Anthony to stop bidding on his own auction,
click the subscribe button!
Oh my god, I'm gonna be the richest person of all time!
Dude, you know that no one else is gonna bid on that
and you're gonna have to pay for it yourself, right?
Damn it!
(quacking)
You've been rubbing the bird for 29 hours straight.
Keep it up.