this video is an unpopular view on the idea of narcissism I'm gonna be sharing
with you how to know if you have maybe some narcissistic traits or if somebody
you know maybe has that and exactly what you can do to either help someone else
or to help and heal yourself welcome back to another video my name is Erin
and I owe people expand their consciousness on this video I'm going to
be sharing with you more on narcissism narcissistic traits narcissistic
characteristics and how to really cure those the reason I'm doing this video
actually is because I have a whole series on this I'll go ahead and link it
below in case you're interesting one of them is on why narcissists don't get
their karma and the other one is on narcissism and understanding how to why
you may have attracted that into your life either a narcissist or a sociopath
and I say this from experience because I have had someone in my life that was or
is still a narcissist but I don't have to deal with it anymore it's my ex
stepmom between the ages of 7 to 15 years old I had to deal with her she was
a mix of what you'd call a narcissist and a sociopath and she would manipulate
people to have stories go out in certain ways she would really take away and in a
way feed on other people's energy and other people's power and it was always
about her and even to this day my dad still has to deal with her and it's
something that I'm able to see even in my half-sister who that's there you know
we have the same dad different mom their mom is this person who was my extant mom
so I see what they have to go through as well and there's certain things that
I've learned from being in it from 7 to 15 years old there's certain things I've
learned from seeing my dad continue to go through it as my sisters are growing
up and it's something that I also have made those videos on on how I navigated
through that how to deal with someone but there's a compassionate part of me
that wants to also make a video for people that maybe feel like they have
narcissistic traits or characteristics and I say that because when I make those
vide and I make that content I've had people
reach out to me on Instagram say well what what do I do if I feel like I had
those characteristics like they feel like in a way those videos may be you
know people always talk about the you know the people that are the victims of
narcissistic traits and characteristics but what about the people that actually
feel like they had those traits and they feel there's something really wrong with
them and the way that I want to share this is an unpopular view because it a
lot of times will favor the person that's the victim I was a victim of it
so you know or what you consider to be that of somebody that definitely
experienced the negative side effects of it however I want to explain it in a way
where if someone is a narcissist watching this video I want you to know
that there is hope and it's not like this is who you are forever I want you
to see also I'm gonna be sharing this in a different perspective it really has to
do with integrating your ego and everyone has an ego everyone has an ego
one of the things about physical experiences that we have this thing
called an ego that we interpret reality through the thing is is sometimes what
happens is we become overly identified with the ego and when we're growing up
this is when we start to learn patterns and behaviors about survival that then
caused certain people that people that are have narcissistic traits or
qualities cause certain people to then survive based on taking from the energy
from other people not even knowing it sometimes so the key to any of this is
first off awareness and also forgiveness forgiveness of the self as well one
thing that really helped me when I went through my spiritual awakening back in
2012 I already had been like seven years without ever having to see my ex stepmom
but the the thing that really helped me was learning how to forgive her
and realize that she went through a lot of pain growing up and that's kind of
what molded her into the kind of person that she is today so in a way she was
most likely as a teenager she was reprimanded in a certain way and she
learned that behavior and act it out it gives other people you
know people that are bullies are normally bullied when they're a kid or
at a certain age and that caused them to become a bully because that's how they
feel that they had to act out now when once I've really forgave my ex stepmom
it really helped and I realized that if you seek first to understand rather than
to be understood it helps quite a bit and I just realized that she been you
know that there's a reason she is that way and it it came from some of the
growing up and some of the things that she learned now first off narcissism
what is exactly narcissism narcissism is an inability to see beyond the self and
that's when the in ego integration comes into place
I recently be looking into this a little bit more because I think that it's a
misunderstood thing in society and that if we approach it from a level of
compassion there's a different level of results that we're gonna get from it
rather than the other side of the spectrum that kind of happens sometimes
when we when we go through different processes now I was actually talking to
a buddy of mine about this you know they - there's two sides of the spectrum so
what this has to do with his ego integration now on one side of it we
have that of what you could call a narcissist and the narcissist is in
survival mode and many times it has that inflated sense of self-importance
because that helps with survival that attention kind of feeds it in a way and
it feeds on the external energy many times the external energy of others
that's a very common thing with the ego think of it like the ego in a way has
locked into place and it has been emphasized in the person that is a
narcissist now a lot of times well it's a hardening of the ego structure and
then it's an identification with this is Who I am and the the thing about the ego
is the ego do whatever it can to survive not just survive with the with food and
shelter but the ego do whatever can to survive in its image of itself so if
it's trying it has this inflated sense of self-importance and it needs that
energy from other people in order to powerful that it will do anything you
can to to retrieve that now here's the thing on the other side of the spectrum
the person that the narcissist normally is around is normally going to be
somebody that maybe needs to learn how to develop their ego structure say they
lack that ego structure they lack that boundaries so in a way it's a lesson and
it's maybe sometimes a harsh lesson for the person that's not the narcissist but
it helps this person learn how to be and to develop the ego structure so in one
there's an over identification with the ego structure and in the other there's a
lack of a belt of that ego structure and the boundaries that that ego structure
can have now there is a difference and the reason I say that there is there is
you don't have to if you look online it'll say that narcissism is never cured
ever and I believe that I believe that through meditation and through levels of
awareness anything is possible I believe that when people have a
spiritual awakening they then go beyond the ego identity and they realize that
they're more than that and really what narcissism is is it's an
inability to see through someone else to someone else's eyes we're given the
ability when we come here to be able to see life through other people's eyes
through empathy and many times that left empathy will be lacked because it is
emphasized in the survival so narcissism and the word narcissism in of itself
will keep people in a little bubble and then everyone else calls them a
narcissist and it keeps it within that little bubble and what I would recommend
may be more powerful is to look at that word of a narcissist and start to let go
of the label in of itself because if there's a difference when somebody says
that if someone says I'm depressed there's a difference between saying I'm
depressed and I'm having depressing thoughts now the thing is is that a
certain point in the past normally narced narcissism is something
that is learned at a young age through watching other parents so added Elva
developmental stage of the ego it then looks to the parents or it looks to the
external and says oh I get rewarded if I emphasize
this the ego structure so then it continues to go through that now the key
and one of the things that will really help a narcissist someone that has
narcissistic traits he'll is first off becoming aware awareness is always the
first key if you become aware you start to loosen that trap nurse I'll tell you
this as well most people that are very deep within the narcissistic
narcissistic label wouldn't even watch this video nine to ten minutes in I'll
tell you that right now most narcissism narcissistic people
would not watch this video this far in so if somebody sent this video to you
and you're nine minutes in I would say that most likely you are at a level of
awareness now to where you're becoming aware of this label and you're becoming
aware of this mentality of the survival mechanism the self-importance and maybe
like yeah you know I do kind of want that validation from other people and
and I do sometimes take power or take from other people there you know want to
sometimes I put other people down because it makes me feel better well
guess what you're becoming aware of it now and when you become aware of it now
you start to lessen the amount of power that this label and this ego structure
this ego structure has over you it's always awareness that begins to free you
now the key to this is knowing that one of these subconscious rules of a
narcissist is that the narcissist needs validation from external sources the the
narcissist needs attention from other people in order to feel fed in order to
feel complete now the thing that a narcissist are somebody who remember
let's start to lessen the degree on the label of this narcissist and start to
see it as more of narcissistic thoughts narcissistic tendencies instead of being
a narcissist because here's the thing if someone views themselves a narcissist
and everyone else is calling someone a narcissist will guess what that ego is
being I is being emphasized and the ego will then do whatever it can to stay
consistent to that now here's the thing that a narcissist needs to remember as
well that when you look at your ego when you
are starting to become more aware you're starting to free yourself and the key to
this is knowing that you can be loved for being you and that you don't need
other people's validation or other people's energy for you to be loved now
this may be a little bit easier said than done because there may have been 20
15 30 years of patterning into this into this ego structure being emphasized now
here's the other thing about it as well some people will go on to the opposite
sides of the spectrum a lot of people that are over here may be very spiritual
people sometimes a lot of spiritual people tend to lack some boundaries
because some what we call spiritual people they want to give and they want
to help other people I know I was a people pleaser for a very long time now
the thing is and sometimes what will happen is then there's this balancing
out of the scales where someone over here will go over here to start to
reclaim their boundaries in certain ways I was talking about someone the other
day about it and they said that they were so much lacking boundaries at one
point that then they said screw it and they started to become more narcissistic
without knowing they're just trying to balance out the scale now imagine they
start to do that and then they start to identify as this and then they just keep
this pattern going it's a pattern and it's a momentum that's been on autopilot
but the first step to this process is becoming aware of it when you become
aware of it you start to free yourself from it so the key to this is becoming
aware of the thoughts becoming aware of the desire to maybe think that you
someone may need someone else's attention someone else's energy and
start becoming aware of when that comes up and start to see those as thoughts
start to see those as beliefs start to see them as emotions rather than a part
of your identity of who you are when you change that when you realize you might
think thoughts but you are not your thoughts that's when you start to become
more powerful that's when you start to take your power back and that's why this
video may not be a very popular view because here's the thing
compassion is the key to this cure compassion and even the narcissus if you
feel like you have narcissistic traits the key is giving compassion to yourself
you give compassion to yourself not needing it from anybody else and the
more you practice this even just doing something very simple of putting your
hands over your heart for a couple minutes a day and completing what is
called mind heart coherence connecting to your mind to your heart and feeling
that gratitude inside of your own body and then saying things like I am safe I
am loved I accept myself knowing you don't need anyone else's validation to
be loved and knowing that it is okay for you to really love yourself but not in
the sense of the narcissistic loving the self because the self that the
narcissistic loves is the ego there is a spiritual side to the narcissist that
maybe the narcissist start to become aware of but there's a spiritual side
which is beyond the self which is beyond the ego and this is why I believe
meditation is one of the most powerful tools for this process in a meditation
of going beyond the self image a meditation of going beyond the ego and
that's what spiritual awakening is spiritual awakening is going beyond the
ego and when you go beyond the ego you start to become free so if you feel like
you have narcissistic tendencies narcissistic characteristics realize
that their thoughts they're patterned behaviors that you're becoming aware of
it's an identity that you think you are if you think you're a narcissist and the
thing is is you can start to see yourself in a different way and I really
believe that now 15 minutes into this video if you really were a narcissist
you wouldn't have watched it this far in because a lot of times narcissists
they're down the rabbit hole and they would want to even entertain an idea
like this because they maybe wouldn't be ready for it
but you aren't a narcissist you may have narcissistic tendencies narcissistic
thoughts but what you can start to do is become aware of them
and then you could start to give yourself love you could start to forgive
yourself forgive yourself if you feel guilty about taking out your energy on
other people on feeling like you've done other people wrong because of some of
your narcissistic tendencies forgive yourself and by forgiving yourself
you'll start to become more free something that I have with this it's
very powerful for narcissistic tendencies for forgiving yourself
forgiving other people has to do with a whole opponent 0.0 meditation it's a
very ancient healing modality from Hawaii it's very powerful I have a video
on it in the top description box below listen to it for 21 days
watch how your life begins to change that will really help with this process
as well and remember there's different sides of this spectrum and if you become
aware of it like on some spiritual people may start to rebel and start to
have more narcissistic tendencies to balance out men in the past they felt
like they lacked that and they had to do it to survive and then they got rewarded
for it so they kept doing it but realize you're becoming aware of this now and as
you become aware of it you can then see its beliefs its rules its thoughts and
what helps with this process is doing meditation the hanno pone opponent
meditation is more of an exercise but it will help you to clear out your
energetic field and to really forgive yourself if you feel like you've been
taking that out on other people and however the energy dynamic may be so if
you want me to do a follow-up video to this let me know or more videos on this
topic but compassion really is the key if you know someone else that's a
narcissist show them compassion they feed or it's a funny thing because I'm
kind of talking to both sides of the spectrum here but if your narcissist
then maybe what happens is you catch yourself if you see somebody else that's
going through something normally you would kind of have something to talk
about if they if somebody gave you some type of resistance the key is becoming
aware of that trigger of that need to latch on and realize no
okay I'm okay I'm safe I love myself I accept myself and if somebody else is
around someone that's a narcissist instead of resisting that feeds the
narcissistic ego structure instead of resisting in arguing with it give it
compassion and compassion it starts to hit the person at the soul level versus
at the ego level and that's when you really start to become free so if you
haven't already subscribe as well I have videos on this channel that share kind
of different things when it comes to the ego it comes to understanding us as
spiritual beings understanding more about how reality works go and subscribe
below and other than that I'll see you on the next video peace
much love and namaste