last og loosely based on your life isn't
that right tell us about the old days
you know yeah there was a life before
show business and I was a kid in the 80s
and crack was rampant
you know everybody trying to sell to get
money and but you know that's a you sold
you so crack yeah but I was a crack
dealer with a heart of gold
I was seldom crack and didn't feel sorry
for them
yeah oh that was some of the crack of
difficulty you know what's gonna kill
you right yeah all right one time I had
an aunt she was doing drugs right
and one day she bought me a gameboy and
did she stole it does she help me look
for and she helped you look for I was
mad so why you bought me a gameboy
stealing to help me look for she said I
had to eliminate myself as a suspect cuz
they go crackheads will steal and sell
anything that ain't nailed down yeah one
day in Harlem when I was younger I've
seen a crackhead trying to sell a whole
fire escape he's still okay but six
floors you had in the push cart yeah big
huffy with him yeah there was some of
the mobsters yeah yeah
where do you go where do you go JC well
one of things I love about using conduct
is you say something really funny but
then you go to another world in between
right
we're you trap I've got to watch my back
we'll keep keep it running anybody from
back in the day now like yeah you've hit
it you're a big star you're you're known
worldwide
you know if they show 30 rock all over
the world did I send them home to
knowledge they what we owe $10 anybody
won't borrow money won't you unless og
so everyone wants everyone wants money
from you they buy one money from you all
right well this joke don't go about
going to my instrument which is my face
bar gave me extra layer skin yeah you go
in there and that's where you go yeah
that's your trouble bear man it's the
most sense you've made all night I'm
saying like you go back okay now there
used to be a different guy now you go
back to that same neighborhood you ever
run into people you used to know who you
know I mean they they maybe they want to
talk to you now that you're famous I'm
famous I got a cousin he I aspired him
to be famous now he wants to be a
magician he's a magician where's he from
really a thief who's not from Brooklyn
he calls himself the great
make a watch disappear they don't rip it
[Applause]
you ever run into any old girlfriends
back in the neighborhood yeah yeah I ran
into murders who mert mert as she walked
400 pounds at my first girlfriend for
the pound your first girlfriend is 400
pounds she was but we go back to fourth
grade she was 250
all right so tell me about this so I
might make a love to her for the first
time mm-hmm
and she said I want you to pick me up
and do me on the wall and say ah God
suppose the scoliosis in my spine you
got picked me up and do me on the wall
when you see her now see when you see
her now she might still looks good to
you I bet right yeah I mean I felt I'm
just in love with her now cuz he's more
mature she's got those bingo wings you
don't know what bingo what are bingo
wings when the old woman hit bingo you
go babe
I'm noting something a wing you can't go
wrong with a little big and strong
can't go wrong okay heating the winter
shading the summer a big girl
so you see you you think stretch marks
that's the mark that's your thing you
you like someone with stretch marks yes
judge monster c-sections that's my
[Laughter]
school so Traci definitely one give it
to my pregnant
I'm giving pregnant cuz I'm old school
I'll be pulling out
[Applause]
there he goes there he goes I'm silly as
man yeah you wanna yeah I'm trying to
break Gandhi's record who haven't been
Gandhi Oh Gandhi I want 20 for bed I
want 24 kids
I got warm up money now when you got
worried about it I'm not gonna use a
condom man if you ain't willing to die
for you really need warning
[Applause]
that makes sense to you now is this true
what is this you you once is this when
you were young you got depressed once
you tried to offer yourself is that true
yeah man I remember that Wow
I tried to kill myself and my first
girlfriend left me man I thought the
world was coming today I was only 16 God
drink old bottle of vo5 he'll feel fine
even care about the ship to me trying to
kill myself the shampoos on sale yeah
yourself customers like everybody else
leave my ship Warlow well what was the
name of that girl that left you broke
your heart
murders murder oh that was murmur yeah
my baby girl
[Applause]
you