First of all, do not adjust your set.
Our wonderful makeup woman, Mara,
could not be here today.
And she called in and she could not come in.
So I have no makeup right now.
This is what I truly look like.
No need to panic.
What do you think, Andy?
You're Conan?
Yes, Conan.
[Andy] Oh my god.
Did you think I was the ghost of Conan?
I wasn't sure.
Yeah, I thought maybe it was like some medical exhibit
about the circulatory system.
Yeah, I know, I know.
I don't have makeup on and everyone on the crew
has been asking me, are you okay
and would you like some bone marrow.
Yeah, you do have, because of your ironclad Irish genetics
your thousands of years of it,
you do have a face that is timeless.
You know, like your face could be from an old movie,
you know what I mean?
Is this a compliment?
I mean it as, well yeah.
If you choose to take it that way.
You're a handsome man.
Thank you.
But you do have a face that looks like
it could be in a field in 1850.
That's the part I don't like,
because they had no access to modern medicine then.
You're saying I look like someone who probably
died at the age of 31.
No, I'm just saying you look like
the product of a lot of cousin (censor beep).
(Conan laughing)
That's all I'm saying.
Well I thought that was clear,
after 28 years of television.
Good god.
No, you are a handsome man.
[Conan] Thank you man, thank you.
But you're very (censor beep) Irish.
Yeah, I'm very Irish.
And look, the makeup makes a difference, it really does.
It takes a lot of makeup just to make me look
like I'm not running a fever.
Seriously, I think you look good without the makeup.
[Conan] Okay good.
I like seeing you natural because it's natural.
It's natural.
Maybe we should tell Mara don't show up again.
You just cost this woman her job.
Hope you're happy now.
Well she could come and just kinda like, just dab.
I do need some dabs.
[Andy] Yeah, yeah.
A few liver spots.