Ellen Pompeo is one of the best known stars on television today. Her role as Dr. Meredith
Grey on Grey's Anatomy has turned her into an icon. But her road to success was challenging,
as she began her journey armed with only talent and determination.
Ellen Pompeo always wanted to act, but she was much too shy to get started in such a
public career. As she told Allure,
"I was very sad and introverted as a child, and I would never, ever have had the confidence
or the extroverted nature to be in a school play."
But after an aunt and uncle took her to see The Rockettes at Radio City Music Hall in
New York City, she became inspired to perform. Pompeo revealed to Allure,
"Afterward, I stood up and said, 'That's what I want to be. They're alive. That's what I
want to do.'"
While she later found success in the world of entertainment, it wasn't an easy journey.
As she told People,
"Where I come from, you don't just say, 'Oh, I'm going to become an actor.'"
Ellen Pompeo was the youngest of six children in an Italian-Irish family, raised in the
Boston suburb Everett. The actress was 5 years old when her mother died, and she was raised
by her father, relatives, and babysitters. Unfortunately, life was tough for Pompeo,
as she explained to Good Housekeeping,
"You can't get out of where I come from if you're a wallflower. [...] My life started
out with tragedy [...] I was pathetically insecure. I didn't have a mother to tell me
how amazing I was."
Luckily, Pompeo's father encouraged her to follow her dreams. And as evidenced by her
successful career, she made him proud.
Ellen Pompeo left her home in Massachusetts after high school and a short time at college
and headed for Miami first, and then New York. According to the Los Angeles Times, while
working as a bartender in 1995, a casting director spoke to Pompeo about being in commercials.
She called the casting director the next day and was sent to three auditions, and was cast
in every one, including a L'Oreal ad.
After breaking into commercials, Pompeo started snagging small screen roles, and parts in
movies alongside bigger stars. Unsurprisingly, it wasn't long before Pompeo was being cast
as the love interest in movies, and proving that she could hold her own alongside some
of Hollywood's biggest stars.
“You know, I'm a hustler."
Ellen Pompeo's career continued to grow when she successfully auditioned for a role in
the 2002 film Moonlight Mile. She starred alongside Jake Gyllenhaal, Susan Sarandon,
and Dustin Hoffman. Film critic Roger Ebert was very impressed by Pompeo's performance
in the movie, and said in a review,
"Pompeo, a newcomer, plays Bertie with a kind of scary charisma that cannot be written,
only felt. [...] She is so vulnerable in this movie."
Pompeo garnered serious interest from major filmmakers after appearing in Moonlight Mile.
She was cast in Catch Me if You Can, which starred Leonardo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks. More
film roles followed, including a part opposite Luke Wilson in the comedy Old School. She
also appeared on an episode of Friends. But according to The Hollywood Reporter,
"By 2004, her movie career had stalled and she was perilously close to broke."
At first, Ellen Pompeo had no interest in being on Grey's Anatomy. She told The Hollywood
Reporter,
"I was like, 'I'm not going to be stuck on a medical show for five years.'"
Pompeo's agent convinced her to audition, and assured her that it was unlikely the pilot
would get picked up. Because she needed the money, Pompeo eventually agreed. Of course,
the show quickly became a huge hit, and it wasn't long before Grey's Anatomy beat out
ER as the longest-running primetime medical drama. Interestingly, in the beginning, Pompeo
was surprised at the show's popularity. She told Allure,
"When I did the pilot, I thought, 'I can't stand medical shows. This will never get on.'"
In 2006, Ellen Pompeo got engaged to record producer Chris Ivery, when he proposed to
Pompeo on her 37th birthday after having breakfast at their home. As People reported,
"Ivery presented Pompeo with a 3.5-carat emerald-cut diamond in a platinum setting."
The two had been dating for three years at that point, after having first built a friendship.
Ivery told People,
"We were friends for six months; then one night she just looked different to me."
Notably, the two had grown up in the Boston area, a short distance apart from one another,
though they didn't meet until later in life. Pompeo revealed to People,
"We were six degrees our whole lives, so I feel like we were sort of meant to be."
Ellen Pompeo married Chris Ivery in New York at City Hall, with Mayor Michael Bloomberg
officiating. According to the Boston Globe, Ivery and Bloomberg have mutual friends having
both grown up in the Boston area. According to Country Living, the wedding was so private
that no guests were invited. On Live with Kelly and Ryan, Pompeo revealed,
"We sorta flew out on a red-eye Thursday night. Friday morning, woke up, went to City Hall,
had the wedding really quick."
Afterwards, Pompeo and Ivery had a private lunch. The actress shared with Los Angeles
Confidential Magazine that they wanted to avoid having a big wedding, and said,
"[W]e want one thing to ourselves."
By 2011, Ellen Pompeo had started her own production company, Calamity Jane, and she
became more involved behind the scenes as a producer. During a 2014 panel discussion
hosted by BuzzFeed, she explained,
"I definitely don't have a strong desire to act after Grey's [Anatomy]; I definitely feel
myself transitioning."
Despite wanting to move away from acting, Pompeo is grateful for her career. During
BuzzFeed's panel discussion, she shared,
"Maybe part of my personality is I feel like I have something to prove sometimes. And with
acting, I don't feel like I have anything to prove anymore."
Grey's Anatomy fans might not realize that Ellen Pompeo played Luna in the Taylor Swift
music video for "Bad Blood." But Pompeo pointed out that she was not a member of Swift's "squad"
as such. During an appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live, Pompeo explained that she and Swift
are not best friends, and didn't really know each other before making the music video.
The star recalled,
"Her people called my people and said, 'Would you like to be in this video?' And I said,
'Oh my god, of course, how fun! Is there an old lady section? I'm down.'"
Pompeo's comment about her age isn't the only one she's made. She revealed to People in
2016,
“My decision to stay on Grey’s [Anatomy] was based solely on age. [...] At 33, I was
wise enough to know my clock was already ticking in Hollywood. [...] But as uncomfortable as
watching myself age is, I don't think focusing on physical beauty is necessarily the best
thing for your mind."
"I think as an actor, flaws are a necessity."
Executive producer Debbie Allen was behind Ellen Pompeo directing the 2017 episode of
Grey's Anatomy called "Be Still, My Soul," which also marked the actress' directorial
debut. But Pompeo wasn't keen on directing at first, and told The Hollywood Reporter,
"I have a new baby at home, two other adorable little kids, a husband, three dogs, four chickens
and a fish and I told Debbie that I couldn't possibly be here another minute than I already
am."
But Pompeo eventually came around to the idea, and even went on to direct more episodes of
the hit show. Importantly, with her work on Grey's Anatomy, Pompeo wants to inspire her
daughter to feel empowered. She explained to The Hollywood Reporter,
"And now my 8-year-old daughter gets to come here and see fierce females in charge. She
loves to sit in the director's chair with the headphones on yelling 'Action' and 'Cut.'
She's growing up in an environment where she's completely comfortable with power. I don't
know any other environment in Hollywood where I could provide that for her."
Ellen Pompeo and Chris Ivery are the parents of three children. Their first daughter, Stella
Luna, was born in 2009, followed by Sienna May in 2014. And in 2016, they welcomed son
Eli Christopher into the family. Pompeo's Instagram bio makes it clear what her role
at home is, as she writes,
"Not a real doctor, but a really good fake one. Personal Assistant to Stella Luna, Sienna
May, and Eli Christopher."
When Pompeo was pregnant during filming for Grey's Anatomy in 2009, and her character,
Meredith Grey, wasn't supposed to be pregnant, she was filmed mostly from the neck up. To
accommodate for her maternity leave, a storyline was written that involved her recuperating
after donating part of her liver to her estranged father.
Regarding her long-lasting marriage with Ivery, Pompeo explained that the secret to a strong
marriage is acceptance. In Us Weekly's podcast In Case You Missed Us, she shared,
"Just don't try to change people. [...] They are who they are, and they were fine when
you married them, so don't expect them to change."
Ellen Pompeo usually doesn't wear makeup when she is not working. As she told Into the Gloss,
"I never wear makeup. I get my makeup done at work, but when I’m not working I never
wear makeup, unless I have to go out. If I go out, I’ll maybe do a pop of a lip, or
I just do a smoky black eye."
The actress also revealed that she likes to keep her beauty routine fairly natural, and
likes to take care of her skin, as she told Into the Gloss,
"I feel like I’ve always looked younger than I am, and now I’ve started seeing my
skin change. Now I do this thing where I fill up a bowl of ice and alkaline water, and I
take it to my bathroom, and I splash my face like 10 times, until my face feels frozen.[...]
I just feel like it tightens everything."
As for her thoughts on plastic surgery and fillers, Pompeo said,
"I don’t have Botox, I don’t have fillers, I don’t have anything, so you know, I really
have to eat well and exercise and do everything, because I don’t want to put stuff in my
face. I have done Botox before, and I can see why you’d get addicted to it."
In 2018, Ellen Pompeo spoke out about having the courage and conviction to ask for what
you deserve in your career. She told The Hollywood Reporter,
"I'm 48 now, so I've finally gotten to the place where I'm OK asking for what I deserve,
which is something that comes only with age."
She also noted that, while people may not find her as relevant anymore after being on
one show for a long time, it takes skill to continuously stay on top of your acting game.
"But the truth is, anybody can be good on a show season one and two. Can you be good
14 years later? Now, that's a [...] skill."
She also highlighted how men may not have any issues requesting more money for their
work, but women often do. She revealed,
"A guy wouldn't have any problem asking for $600,000 an episode. And as women, we're like,
"Oh, can I ask for that? Is that OK?"
Proving that she knows her worth, towards the end of 2017, Pompeo signed a deal with
Grey's Anatomy that made her one of television's highest-paid actresses, with secured earnings
of $20 million per year.
Given that Ellen Pompeo is the beating heart of Grey's Anatomy, you may be tempted to think
that she's content to just show up for work, get it done, and leave. But that's not the
case, as Pompeo is passionate about using the show as a teaching tool. In an interview
with Variety in 2020, Pompeo revealed,
"We were able to have a story line that dealt with a young, undocumented child not having
health insurance, [and that] was a story line that [showrunner] Krista [Vernoff] and I felt
really grateful to be able to tell."
Pompeo knows that some people might think she's being controversial by making statements
like that, but that just doesn't concern her. She continued,
"I know everybody's not so crazy about it sometimes — and whatever, they don't have
to watch if they're not crazy about it. But to touch on political issues like this is
important."
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