>>>
>>> WESHG
>>> WESHG BACK EVERYONE. AS PARENTS HAVE YOU EVER
WONDERED IF YOUR CHILD WILL GROW
UP TO BE A GOOD PERSON.
IT DOES MAKE YOU WONDER IF WE'RE
DOING EVERYTHING WE CAN TO RAISE
KIND CARING ADULTS.
HOW CAN WE MAKE THE BIGGEST
IMPACTS ON OUR LITTLE ONES.
WE DECIDED TO DIVE INTO THIS IN
REAL TALK TODAY.
AND CEO OF THEORY COMMUNICATIONS
ANDRIA HAMILTON.
ANDRIA HAMILTON. HI GUYS.
HI GUYS.
HI GUYS. >> NICE TO SEE YOU.
>> FIRST LET'S TALK I HAVE TWO
GIRLS 8 AND 10.
>> OKAY.
>> OKAY.
>> OKAY. I HAVE 11-YEAR-OLD TWINS.
BOY, GIRL AND ANOTHER LITTLE BOY
THAT'S 10.
THAT'S 10. >> AND I HAVE A DAUGHTER, AVA
SHE'LL BE 4 ON FRIDAY.
>> AND I HAVE TWO BOYS 6 AND 3.
>> I THINK IT'S SAFE TO SAY WITH
YOU HAVING THE OLDEST HERE I'M
ALWAYS LOOKING TO MY FRIENDS
WITH OLDER KIDS TO SEE WHAT ARE
THEY DOING RIGHT.
EXPERTS SAY AND THIS IS NO
SURPRISE, EMPATHY IS NOT A SICK
TRAIT AND IT TAKES TIME TO
DEVELOP.
DEVELOP.
DEVELOP. PSYCHOLOGISTS PARENTS, OTHER
EXPERTS BUT HOW TO INSTILL
EMPATHY IN CHILDREN.
HERE ARE JUST A FEW OTHER TIPS
AND I WANT YOU GUYS TO WEIGH IN.
THE FIRST WAS SIMPLY TALKING
ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS.
THIS ONE EXPERT SAYS IMPORTANT
TO PROMOTE FACE TO FACE
COMMUNICATION IN THIS AGE OF
TEXTING AND SMARTPHONES SHE SAYS
DIGITAL DRIVEN KIDS AREN'T
NECESSARILY LEARNING REAL
EMOTION.
EMOTION.
EMOTION. YOU GET THE EMOJIS.
BUT LET'S GO BACK TO THAT FACE
TO FACE COMMUNICATION.
HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT?
>> YES, I THINK OUR KIDS DO NEED
TO SEE OUR EMOTIONS AND THEN WE
NEED TO ADDRESS THEIR EMOTIONS
AND TELL THEM IT'S OKAY TO FEEL
THAT WAY AND PUT A NAME TO IT.
IT'S OKAY TO FEEL FRUSTRATED AND
ANGRY BUT IT'S NOT OKAY HOW YOU
ACTED OR LET'S TALK ABOUT AN
APPROPRIATE WAY TO PROCESS IT.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> I AGREE WITH THAT.
.
.
. AND
. AND I
. AND I HAVE TROUBLE WITH THAT
WITH CAROLINE BECAUSE SHE'S NOW
REALIZING BECAUSE OF HER
LEARNING ISSUE SHE GETS PULLED
AWAY TO TEST AND SHE CRIES SHE'S
SO EMBARRASSED BUT I'M LIKE
LET'S TALK ABOUT IT AND TELL ME
WHAT YOU'RE FEELING BUT SHE'S
OUTBURST WITH TEARS AND I'M LIKE
WAIT THAT'S THE THING.
>> IT'S GOOD TO EXPLAIN EACH
FEELING WITH YOUR CHILD.
MY CHILD SHE'S ABOUT TO BE 4
SHE'S ALWAYS ON HER iPAD.
I HAD TO CONFISCATE IT NOT AS A
PUNISHMENT BUT I WANT YOU TO
PLAY WITH YOUR BARBIE DOLLS AND
PLAY LIKE NORMAL CHILDREN AND
INSTEAD OF WATCHING KIDS PLAY
WITH TOYS ON YouTube AND ALL THE
KIDS COME OVER AND THEY'RE ALL
ON THEIR TABLETS.
SO IT'S BETTER FOR THEM TO
INTERACT WITH EACH OTHER BECAUSE
THEY CAN HAVE INTERACTIONS WHERE
THEY FEEL EXCITED, HAPPY, UPSET.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT. >> SO I DEFINITELY HAVE KIND OF
TRANSITIONED INTO MAKING HER
HAVE MORE FACE TO FACE
INTERACTIONS WITH ALL THE KIDS
AROUND HER AND WITH US AS WELL.
>> WELL PLAYED.
THE MORE YOU ARE SURROUNDED THE
MORE YOU KNOW HOW TO HANDLE IT
LATER ON.
LATER ON.
LATER ON. >> IT'S HARD.
IT'S KIND OF WHAT WE DO.
>> IT IS.
>> IT IS.
>> IT IS. I I WOULD NEVER TELL JAMES.
YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO.
ANY OF THOSE STEREOTYPES FROM
WAY BACK WHEN.
I WANT HIM TO CRY AND SENSITIVE.
I ENCOURAGE IT.
HE'S A LITTLE TOO SENSE TI BUT I
REALLY DON'T HAVE TO WORK WITH
HIM ON EXPRESSING HIMSELF
BECAUSE I THINK AND I'LL SEE HOW
THE NEXT ONE IS BECAUSE HE
DOESN'T SEEM AS SENSE TI.
WE'LL SEE.
WE'LL SEE. SOMETIMES I DO THINK A LOT OF
QUALITIES ARE JUST INNATE IN
YOUR CHILD IF THEY'RE MORE OPEN
OR IF THEY'RE MORE EMOTIONAL OR
SENSITIVE AND THAT MIGHT BE
EASIER THAN TO TEACH THEM A
SKILL SUCH AS EMPATHY.
>> THAT'S A VERY GOOD POINT.
YOU SEE AND YOU'LL SEE IT TOO AT
4:00 YOU KNOW HOW THEY ARE
PRETTY MUCH THE EMOTIONS THAT
THEY WERE DISPLAYING AT THOSE
EARLY AGES THEY PRETTY MUCH ARE
WHERE THEY ARE TODAY, THE SAME
PERSON BUT HOW DO WE MAKE THAT
-- HOW DO WE MAKE THOSE CARING,
COMPASSIONATE INDIVIDUALS?
COMPASSIONATE INDIVIDUALS? THAT'S THE QUESTION.
SO THIS SECOND POINT SAID TO
ACTUALLY HIGHLIGHT OR HIGHLIGHT
UP CLOSE TOO USE MEDIA TO OUR
ADVANTAGE.
ADVANTAGE. SO THIS PARTICULAR AUTHOR SAYS
DISCUSS INSTANCES WHEN
CHARACTERS ARE BEING EMPHASIS
THETIC AS WELL AS HURTFUL AND
MEAN.
MEAN.
MEAN. I
MEAN. I FIND MYSELF WATCHING MOVIES OR
SOME OF THEIR SHOWS TOGETHER.
IT'S A PERFECT OPPORTUNITY LIKE
WOW SHE WAS NOT NICE.
WHY WOULD SHE ACT THAT WAY.
>> AND HOW WOULD YOU HAVE
HANDLED THAT.
HANDLED THAT. >> EXACTLY.
>> EXACTLY. >> IT'S NOT ALWAYS.
SOMETIMES THEY'RE LIKE SHH.
>> EVERYTHING'S A LEARNING
EXPERIENCE.
EXPERIENCE. >> I KNOW.
YOU TRY YOUR HARDEST TO MAKE
EVERYTHING SOME TYPE OF FUN
LEARNING EXPERIENCE.
LEARNING EXPERIENCE. >> YEAH, JAMES LOVED DANIEL
TIGER AND HE'S VERY SENSITIVE TO
THAT.
THAT.
THAT. AND
THAT. AND ISAAC DOESN'T WATCH IT.
I NEED TO TEACH YOU A LITTLE BIT
MORE.
MORE.
MORE. NOT
MORE. NOT THAT I LET MY CHILDREN JUST
WATCH TAND THAT'S WHERE THEY GET
THEIR LESSONS FROM BUT IT
DOESN'T HURT.
DOESN'T HURT. CHILDREN ARE SPONGES SO THEY
SOAK UP EVERYTHING.
LIKE I SAID USE EVERYTHING AS A
LEARNING EXPERIENCE IF YOU CAN.
>> I LOVE THIS NEXT ONE AND I
FEEL LIKE I HAVE BEEN DOING THIS
AS OF LATE UNFORTUNATELY DEALING
WITH HORMONES AND MENOPAUSE AND
SOMETIMES I ACT A WAY THAT I
SHOULDN'T.
SHOULDN'T. OWN UP TO YOUR OWN MISTAKES.
IF YOU'RE SHORT WITH THEM OR YOU
THEY SEE YOU OR WATCH YOU DOING
SOMETHING YOU KNOW WHAT GUYS I'M
SO SORRY THERE WAS NO REASON FOR
ME TO SNAP AT YOU LIKE THAT I
WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU.
THEN THEY'RE LIKE OH, WOW.
MOM WAS APOLOGIZING AND BEING
REAL.
REAL.
REAL. >>
REAL. >> ABSOLUTELY.
>> ABSOLUTELY. AND WE FOUGHT THROUGH IT LIKE
HOW COULD I HAVE HANDLED THAT
BETTER.
BETTER.
BETTER. AND THEY SEE WE GET FRUSTRATED
TOO.
TOO.
TOO. >>
TOO. >> DO THEY GIVE YOU GOOD
FEEDBACK.
FEEDBACK.
FEEDBACK. >> THEY DO.
MY KIDS FOUND IF I JUST ASK THEM
A QUESTION HOW TO HANDLE
SOMETHING, THEY USUALLY LIKE MY
SON HOW TO HANDLE FRUSTRATION I
SAID HOW CAN WE NOT DO THAT?
HE'S LIKE WHAT IF I PUT MY HANDS
IN MY POCKET.
I WAS LIKE OKAY.
SO I FOUND A LOT OF TIMES KIDS
WILL GIVE YOU A VERY GREAT
ANSWER OF HOW TO CORRECT A
PROBLEM BECAUSE THEY DON'T SEEM
TO HAVE ALL THE DIFFERENT
STRESSES WE HAVE.
>> MY DAUGHTER'S VERY VOCAL.
SHE'LL TELL ME MOMMY YOU'RE
BEING MEAN AND I GET TAKEN IT
BACK LIKE OH, MY GOODNESS AM I.
LET'S BRING IT BACK.
LET'S SIT DOWN, I APOLOGIZE.
I WAS NOT BEING MEAN.
I WAS SAYING NO YOU CANNOT HAVE
A FRUIT ROLL UP.
BUT SHE ALWAYS WILL TELL ME LIKE
HER FRIEND'S I'M REALLY EXCITED
SO MY DAUGHTER'S REALLY LEARNING
THE EMOTIONS AND I'M TRYING MY
BEST TO PUSH THEM IN THERE AND
CONSTANTLY SHOW ON MY END TOO.
WHEN SHE SAYS IT'S ME OH, MY
GOODNESS.
GOODNESS.
GOODNESS. >> A LITTLE BIT OF A REALITY
CHECK.
CHECK.
CHECK. I
CHECK. I LIKE THE WAY THAT YOU PUT A
DIFFERENT SPIN ON THAT BY SAYING
ACTUALLY I'M TRYING TO BE STERN.
YOU KNOW, I'M SORRY IF YOU
THOUGHT I WAS BEING MEAN YOU I
REALLY WAS LOOKING OUT FOR YOUR
BEST INTEREST.
BEST INTEREST. BUT A LITTLE PRECOCIOUS.
YOU'RE LIKE YES INDEED.
ANOTHER SUGGESTION.
ANOTHER SUGGESTION. OF COURSE.
OF COURSE. MAKE SURE THAT YOU ACKNOWLEDGE
THEIR ACTS OF KINDNESS.
SO YOU KNOW ALWAYS REENFORCING
THAT, THE GOOD GRADES.
I DON'T EVEN THINK SO MUCH ABOUT
GRADES OR ATHLETICS.
I TRY TO DO THAT MORE WITH THE
WAY THAT THEY ARE IF I SEE THEM
ON A PLAY DATE I LIKE SOMETHING
I ACKNOWLEDGE THAT.
>> WE HAD A JAR THAT WAS CALLED
THE UNSOLICITED COMPLIMENT JAR
AND THEY GET LITTLE PUFF
POM-POMS AND THEY GOT TO TREAT
THEMSELVES TO A GIFT THE MORE
THEY GOT AND IT WAS SO EXCITING
BECAUSE NOT ONLY WOULD MY KIDS
GET INTO IT BUT THE PERSON THAT
GAVE ME THE UNSOLICITED
COMPLIMENT I WOULD TELL THEM OH,
MY GOODNESS AND THEY FELT LIKE
THEY WERE APART OF IT TOO.
IT WAS JUST AN ALL IN ALL GOOD
FEELING.
FEELING.
FEELING. >> IT HAS WORKED REALLY WELL AND
NOW MY KIDS TELL ME WHEN THEY
SEE ONE OF THEIR SIBLINGS DOING
SOMETHING.
SOMETHING. AND SO I'M LIKE YOU GET A TREAT.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH.
>> YEAH. >> YOU KNOW, AND I LOVE THAT
YOU'RE REENFORCING THAT AGAIN
AND WE CAN FIND NEGATIVITY ANY
SECOND OF THE DAY WE'RE MAKING
SURE THEY'RE LOOKING AROUND FOR
THOSE HELPFUL MOMENTS WHERE
PEOPLE ARE BEING THEIR BEST
SELVES.
SELVES.
SELVES. >>> ANOTHER SUGGESTION IS THEY
TALK ABOUT JUST LOOK AROUND.
EVEN IN TODAY'S BRACE CULTURE
ALL OF THESE ACTS OF KINDNESS.
ALZHEIMER'S DID YOU SEE THAT OR
HOW AMAZING.
HOW AMAZING. MOMMY THREW A BABY SHOWER FOR
MISS CARA.
MISS CARA. I'M SORRY CARA.
>> LET'S GET A GLIMPSE.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT. >> YOU KNOW, MAKE SURE THAT YOU
OPEN IT UP AND THAT WE'RE
POINTING THAT OUT AS WELL.
LIKE WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE
OUTSIDE WORLD NOT JUST WHAT'S
HAPPENING IN THEIR WORLD.
>> I JUST THINK IT WORKS BETTER
FOR KIDS LIKE I SAID TO EXPLAIN
THINGS.
THINGS.
THINGS. WE NEVER DID BABY TALK
EVERYTHING WAS EXPLAINED LIKE AN
ADULT AND SO BY EXPLAINING
WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE OUTSIDE
WORLD AND POINTING THINGS OUT IT
HELPS THEM.
HELPS THEM. IT'S JUST IMPORTANT TO MAKE
EVERYTHING A LEARNING
EXPERIENCE.
EXPERIENCE. >> AND CHILDREN ARE GOOD.
I HAVE TO BE AWARE NOW OF HAVING
THE NATIONAL NEWS ON BECAUSE OF
ALL THE STUFF THAT'S ON.
AND SO IT'S INTERESTING BECAUSE
IF I FORGET TO TURN IT OFF WHAT
JAMES GRAVITATES TOWARDS IS THAT
HAPPY STORY AT THE END AND
BE DOING SOMETHING ELSE AND
KIND OF LOOK UP AND
COMMENT ON IT AND I'M LIKE
THAT'S REALLY TELLING BECAUSE I
THINK THEIR LITTLE BRAINS CAN'T
COMPREHEND A LOT OF THE OTHER
STUFF BUT THEY KNOW WHEN
SOMEBODY'S BEING KIND AND GOOD.
>> WHATEVER IT IS IT TRIGGERS
WHETHER IT'S A WORD OR EVEN THE
WAY THE EXPRESSION.
>> MIGHT EVEN BE COMBATIVE
LANGUAGE.
LANGUAGE.
LANGUAGE. >> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT.
>> RIGHT. >> THAT MAKES ME SO HAPPY.
>> YOU GUYS MAKE