(rock music)
- From the Edingburgh Fringe Festival,
it's Set List's Standup Without a Net.
Challenging comedians from around the world
to create standup comedy out of thin air.
And they're gonna riff on topics we gave 'em
on the spot, under pressure, and with zero preparation.
- I'm panicked, I was just writing to my wife.
I'm panicked 'cause you get that fucking adrenaline rush,
and you go, "Why do I do this bullshit?"
I can't stop doing James Gandalfini since he fucking died.
I can't stop doin' it.
I miss him, I miss him.
- Will you welcome the never-before-seen Set List
of Mr. Tony Law!
(cheering)
(laughing)
- Well I gotta tell you one thing.
(laughing)
You know, I'm not religious or nothing.
I'm not, I'm not religious,
but I (chuckles) also.
I, my god, I'm fucked.
(crowd laughs)
That's what I say every morning.
I wake up, and I look in the mirror,
and I go o my god, I'm fucked.
And I think Tony, just remember your roots.
Remember who you are.
(chuckling)
Stay true to your soul.
You know who you are, Tony?
You're an architect.
(crowd laughs)
You're not some sort of comedian
who needs people to love him, or strangers.
You're an architect.
Remember that.
You got a white shirt on.
(crowd laughs)
And you design buildings.
You design tall buildings.
Thank you so much, guys.
And I'm so glad I'm able to be here and speak you guys.
I design tall buildings. (chuckling)
Thing is, though.
(crowd laughs)
Some of the tall buildings I design
have got to much fucking foreskin,
so I cut that fucking shit up!
Move along to the next topic pricks!
(crowd cheers)
Ooh.
I check my thoughts
with inanimate objects.
I ain't much of a reader
but I can read real good if I concentrate.
My life.
My life, I'm finding new ways to do Set List.
Finding new ways to do it Tom.
Oh, Tony you alcoholic fucker.
What's going on?
You drunk fucking prick.
What's going on?
I, thing is about Edinburgh,
what I like about Edinburgh is that
at least 30% of you are alcoholics as well.
But I do, I do check my thoughts.
I do.
What did I mean?
(crowd laughs)
What did I mean? (clapping)
I mean I was doing all that talking
but I don't know what I meant.
What do you think I meant?
I don't know what I mean!
Tell me how I feel!
I feel like I'm dying alone.
(crowd laughs)
Losing my family.
Sorry what?
You think I'm doing okay?
Thank you mic stand.
Thank you that's really good,
that's all I needed actually.
He said I'm doing okay.
Next!
(crowd laughs)
Hurry it!
(crowd cheers)
Bam!
Bam (chuckles) bam!
(crowd laughs)
Don't film this.
This is embarrassing.
(crowd laughs)
You're gonna put this online?
Ah mind you.
Fuck, you've seen my live shows.
Not much different.
(crowd laughs)
Growing up in Alberta I gotta tell you.
I gotta be honest with you guys.
Growing up in Alberta
I used to have a few buddies, we used to run around there.
It was me and, there's Glenn Wool.
Me and him, we ran around.
We ran around together me and Glenn Wool.
He died in a wood chipper accident.
(crowd laughs)
Jeez, I'm like Glenn,
get out of the fucking wood chipper you fucking dickhead.
You're gonna, oh jeez, you got all chipped up.
(crowd laughs)
You got all chipped up.
I got like tiny bits of Glenn Wool all over my face.
Even now, eh.
And I said so here's the deal.
Here's the deal eh.
Like oh, so like, fucking here's the deal.
Like, you know where's?
Where's Gary?
I don't know where he is.
(crowd chuckles)
He doesn't like being,
he doesn't like being near anyone who's not called Dwight.
(crowd laughs)
But we know loads of Dwights.
We know loads of Dwights.
No, no, he's,
he's got a real problem.
He likes only Dwights.
(crowd laughs)
He's a Dwight supremacist.
That's all I can do with that.
(crowd laughs)
what am I, a fucking wizard over here?
(crowd laughs)
Oh boy.
You know what.
Because I don't even know what that word means.
Fuck you college people!
Oh, we've all got laptops and done learning.
I don't know another word for death and sex with it.
I don't.
The only one I know is, oh right.
(crowd laughs)
But every time I see that word I just jump over it.
(crowd laughs)
You're been very kind.
Thank you very much today. (crowd cheers)
(rock music)
- I miss James Gandolfini.
I really do.
You can't smoke and drink and be that fat.
Is there a secret smoking area?
- Yeah, it's next to the cafe.
- Oh fuck, I have to go all the way downstairs.
(snare music)
(upbeat electronic music)