So, for those of you living in cities where Cineplex has the TimePlay enabled, in your theatre,
I want you to all choose the name Muhammed when you go to the theatre because that 's what I do
and I make all my friends do it.
Because they wont let you pick offensive names like dick,
which is a real name, but they let you pick Muhammed.
So, It's funny w- the- the more Muhammeds there are on the screen at the end the better.
And I want to go to a theatre one day where literally all ten names on the leaderboards are,
like, Muhammeds. Its really- I don’t know why It's funny but I- I think It's funny.
So I just saw Insidious 1.5, I mean The Conjuring and I would give it a six out of ten.
Its not a bad movie, I mean, you can tell that James Wan actually gave a shit about this one.
In terms of, ya making references to himself with the creepy dolls.
And your like "oh its the guy that make the jigsaw doll and the guy that made dead silence.
He likes creepy dolls." Or the fact that he included that onner,
ya know, the seamless shot of them unpacking the house.
Ya know, that actually took effort. And it was very similar to that scene in his other movie,
Death Sentence with Kevin bacon, that I'll link down below or at least the featurette to that scene.
Because, he actually puts effort into things sometimes and this is a movie where,
as a whole, I would say that he actually put a lot of effort into it.
And even though it is the movie that follows the formula of
"we're a family moving into a house. Oops, turns out somebody died here. Now there's ghosts."
Even though it's one of those, It's probably the best one of those.
Which really isn't saying much.
It s a crowd pleaser.
I would recommend it to the general public and, as you can see on IMBD right now,
the general public loves it.
As for me, maybe I have a bias.
Maybe I'm not scared by ghost movies.
And I think that's part of the issue for me honestly.
It's because when you write a ghost movie, you don’t really have to gave a shit
or pay attention or put any effort into what the antagonist is doing.
Not even really what their motivations are. All you have to do is have a little blurb like,
this is how they died, this is how they killed someone,
and then it will loosely relate to what the antagonist's motivations are, perhaps near the end of the film.
And, literally, your entire script is just thinking
"I want someone to be scared at this interval in almost a formulated way"
And you just pick a random fuckin' person, it doesn't even matter because, I mean,
the presence of the antagonist is just appearing and then disappearing.
It doesn't matter it's like "we're always with you. We're in the house. We're attached on to-
We're spirits." Like, it doesn- it doesn't scare me. I- there's no presence to it
and I don't believe in ghosts and... the entire theatre was screaming.
Its kind of embarrassing but not half as embarrassing as the look that guy next to me
gave me when I asked if he wanted to be Muhammed on TimePlay.
This is the type of movie where the- the dog barks at the house
'cause the dog knows more about ghosts and then the--
I guess I'm putting spoiler alert now, spoiler alert.
The kid, the youngest child, seems to have a connection with the ghosts
and is so nonchalant about it being like "oh, its my friend.
Billy whats- what? Why would this be anything out of the norm? I talk to ghosts."
It's every fucking movie. Its- it hap- there’s a million of these movies.
This one's slightly better but it's the exact same thing you've already seen a hundred thousand times.
There's a scene where they go into first person perspective
with a video camera and they go into the basement.
And I found that kinda cool. ya know, they’re paying homage to a different genre
that you have been loosely involved in, as a director.
And uhh, wha- didn't seem to bother anybody but me 'cause I can't experience any joy ever.
Is the 1960s camera that they were using had, like, 8k resolution.
what was up with that?
What was up with it?
Something that I was expecting to happen, at about the end, it was I was expecting a twist.
I was expecting there to be a reveal that, uhh, the youngest child was actually possessed
from the point where the dog had died. I- I was expecting that because
they were giving so many subtle hints throughout the movie
and I wouldn't be surprised if there is an alternate ending that revealed that my theory was plausible.
But th- ya know they said, uhh, that the demon worked by, umm,
breaking down the most physiologically vulnerable person in the house.
Now, the camera was on the mom character and we all knew it was her
at that point because she was the one getting bruises and it was being
implied that it was her. but, if you actually think about it, its like who-
why would the mother be more physiologically vulnerable than a fucking four year old?
I don't get it.
I mean, just from that line alone I was kind of expecting them.
and I was like "I see what you're doing." And not only that, umm...
they did say that there would have to be some sort--
Like- like- like the fact that the kid went outside alone to see that the dog had died.
you could argue that the ghosts set that up, for that child, to break her down.
And then enter her body. Gross.
I was really expecting it. Because the kid was acting fucked up, stupid, creepy, nonchalant
and not a care in the world the whole movie. there was one good scene
with one of the child actors where she was like "It's behind the door!"
and I was like "that's pretty well acted." But then after the event happened,
like, after the parents came in the room and were like "what the fuck's going on?"
then, for some reason, her acting became less convincing and I don’t know why that is.
I guess it was, like, a different type of scared that she was performing.
But all the sudden it was like "hey, you’re smiling now." It had its moments.
Umm, six out of ten.
That's a- that's all I got to say really.
There was some continuity errors and there was some moments where they
made a cut in mid SENTENCE. And it did exactly what I just did
there and you could tell it was from two different takes.
Maybe I should have actually made a cut but you get what I was saying.
Six out of ten and umm, I'm gonna keep working on my new review,
as soon as I'm not working my real job.
I just got back from work right now, I would have made this quickie yesterday.
I don’t know why I didn't. everything sucks right now.
I’m not going to talk about my personal problems because this is my review channel.