Hi, I'm Patrick Star,
and I live with my parents!
Ow!
This is my dad.
This is my mom.
[giggles]
This is my sister. She's shy.
This is my grandpa.
This is my room.
And this...
This is my show!
[barking]
[screaming]
[snoring]
[trumpet playing]
[alarm ringing] Ah!
[screams]
[groans]
The best way out of bed is an urchin on your head.
[flute notes playing]
Ah!
Who's the best pet urchin in the whole world?
You are, Ouchie! Give us a kiss!
Ouch.
Love hurts.
Well, off you go, little man.
[giggles]
Of course, you have to remember to brush every morning.
Keeping my eyes minty fresh.
Mm?
[whistles]
[laughs] Gross.
[blowing a raspberry]
Uh-oh, it's almost time for my show!
I better get Squidina.
[growling]
Oops, wrong door?
Now, where was that door?
Mm...
There it is!
Where are you going? The show is this way!
Knock 'em dead, bro.
And now, it's the Patrick Show, with your host Patrick Star!
[barking and clapping]
Oh...
♪ I can do anything 'Cause I know nothing ♪
♪ Lack of experience Never stopped me ♪
♪ I got a TV show I'm not just bluffing ♪
♪ Meant to leave you watching And I know you'll agree ♪
[humming]
Huh?
[shudders]
♪ The Patrick Show Is all my imagination ♪
♪ Because my head is empty I can fill it with cheese ♪
♪ Ice cream with syrup And marvelous blueberries ♪
♪ There is one thing I can't find ♪
♪ And that is my... keys? ♪
Hey, Patrick, what's today's show gonna be about?
[stomach grumbling]
I don't know, I'm hungry.
We'll be right back
with Patrick Star and "I'm hungry",
right after these words.
♪ Chum, chum, chum ♪
[Plankton] Chum!
It's versatile. You can spread it on toast.
It also keeps you warm in frosty winter nights.
Cozy!
The smell keeps out the cold.
Here at the Chum Bucket,
chum comes in three delicious varieties.
Moist, soggy and pumpkin spice.
♪ Chum Bucket Have chum with your chum! ♪
Well, that reminds me...
Breakfast!
In this family you gotta be fast or the food's all gone.
Let's go backstage.
[gust of air]
[clucking]
Wrong door again?!
[grunting]
[snaps fingers] Hmm.
[humming]
Leedle-leedle leedle-leedle-leedle!
[grunts]
Morning, Mom.
[laughs]
Good morning, Dad.
[both laugh]
Uh?
Mom, Dad?
Who's this guy?
I have no idea.
Do you, Cecil?
So you can see him too, Bunny?
Oh, I thought I was the only one.
I'm your grandfather!
GrandPat!
Must we do this every morning?!
Just play along.
He could be dangerous.
- Uh-huh. - Hey, Sis, what are you up to?
Well, right now, I'm trying to book an imaginary ad
for your imaginary TV show.
Well, how's it going?
They said their imaginary people
are going to call my imaginary people.
[cheers]
So, anyway...
[humming]
As they say in France,
blown apple feet.
Mm...
All done.
Darn, looks like I'll be on time for work again.
Oh, I'm sorry, dear.
[beeping]
Hey, what about my breakfast?
Well, I guess I'll just have to break my own fast.
[grunting]
Oh...
[growling]
I think the milk went bad.
[inaudible chatter]
Oh...
Hey, it's the Dartfish family.
Good morning, Patrick.
Would you like to join us
for our sad and meager breakfast?
Well, I...
[whimpering]
Uh...
No, I guess not.
All right, then.
[sighing]
Well, we gotta dart.
[whistles]
Food!
Here, foodie food!
Hello?
Food!
[fireworks and cheering]
Eww! Mom's gotta vacuum under there more often.
Food! Food!
[grunting]
Hey, what are you doing in my room?
Duh, looking for food.
I'm starving.
Food?!
You kids have it easy these days!
Back in my day we were food!
Ooh...
What flavor?
Hush, noodle brain.
Noodles...
It was way back
in the Patrolithic period of early cavestars.
[stomachs grumbling]
Automobiles hadn't been invented yet,
so there was no way to get to a supermarket.
Oh!
We had to do all our shopping in the wild.
[grunting]
Where the dinosaurs were shopping for us.
[screaming]
[thud]
[groaning]
[roaring]
It was just a matter of luck as to who would eat who.
[screaming]
[sighs]
I guess things can't get any worse.
[chewing]
[playing the clarinet off-key]
Oh...!
[groaning]
And thus, cavestars provided nutrition to the dinosaurs.
And that's why dinosaurs are still with us today.
[playing off-key]
[roaring]
- [belching] - That reminds me... I'm hungry!
Mm...
I know!
I'll do a cooking segment on my show
and I'll make myself something to eat!
Hop! Hop!
[crash]
Welcome back to the show!
Now we're going to make a casserole!
[barking and clapping]
Uh, let's see.
We got socks, dirty sneakers, dried leaves,
old paperbacks and used napkins?
Mm...
Eh, you gotta work with what you got.
To the oven.
Cook at 1,000 degrees for one second.
[ding] It's ready!
Oh...?
[blowing a raspberry]
Time to wrap it up!
The story, characters and names portrayed in this production
are suspicious, especially mine.
No person associated with this show
is saying anything of value, especially me.
No one was harmed in the making of this show, except me. Ouch.
Thanks for watching!
That was amazing!
The song! The trasherole!
The whole number with the cast of thousands!
Hi!
I don't remember that at all.
I don't know how you do it.
I don't know what I do it.
I bet you worked up an appetite!
Ooh...
Food!
Aww...
I missed food again!
Hello, Patrick, we're just having dinner.
One piece of crumb for each of us.
Here you go, Teensy Tom.
Now you won't starve.
Aww... Food?
[sniffing]
[sighs]
Nah, Teensy, you eat it.
[ding]
Huh? Dinner?
[cheers]
Here we are!
It's called a trasherole.
I learned it from a show I saw today.
I think.
I must've cooked mine too long.
Blown apple feet!
Mm...!
Delicious, Mom.
Get this, I just booked a sponge with square pants
who does a bubble act.
And the best part is,
I did it on my toy telephone!
[mooing]
[laughing]
Goodnight, Squidina.
Goodnight, big brother.
Goodnight, Ouchie.
Ouch.
[snoring]
Would you just look at him, Mother?
The little angel.
He sure is.
Uh, who is he again?
I have no idea.
[snoring]
[growling]
Join Patrick in the Patrick Star Show.
That's the brand-new series Friday nights at 7:00.
Only on Nickelodeon.