How has Prince Harry's departure from the royal family impacted his dynamic with the
Queen? What was exposed during the much anticipated Oprah interview with Harry and Meghan Markle?
Sit tight -- this is the truth about Prince Harry's relationship with his grandmother,
Queen Elizabeth.
Everyone wants to have a good relationship with their grandmother, but not every grandmother
is the Queen of England. But Prince Harry didn't seem to let titles and formalities
impact his early relationship with Elizabeth, because as noted by Vanity Fair, the two were
very close in Harry's younger years.
A close confidant of the Queen shared that the two had a, quote, "very warm and jokey
grandmother grandson rapport" in both private and public life. For instance, Harry gifted
his grandmother a shower cap for Christmas one year that had "Ain't life a b----" written
on it. Yes, you heard that correctly, the Queen has a naughty shower cap. According
to Marie Claire, she was absolutely taken with it, finding it "hilarious."
In their shared public lives, Harry often pushed his grandmother into uncharted, but
jovial waters. For example, he convinced her to appear in a spoof video with Barack and
Michelle Obama for his charity, the Invictus Games. Fair to say that their relationship
has a solid foundation.
"Oh really, please."
"Boom."
Prince Harry has always been a beloved member of the royal family, but he made some very
controversial decisions as a young man, to say the least. So when it came time for him
to formally represent Queen Elizabeth during his first international tour in 2012, Harry
was given some rather grueling advice from the monarch.
As noted by British Heritage, Queen Elizabeth told Harry to, quote, "think of the nation's
needs rather than [his] own." Harry's brother, Prince William, was also privy to the conversation.
The advice reportedly stemmed from the fact that the Queen was "concerned" about Harry's
priorities, and that there was hesitation about his ability to represent the Crown internationally.
But Harry clearly pulled off the tour and worked to make his grandmother proud. Katie
Nicholl, the author of Harry: Life, Loss, and Love, wrote that the tour, quote, "was
an opportunity to show a sober, more mature side to his personality," an opportunity that
Harry took advantage of.
The world held its breath when Diana Spencer, Princess of Wales, tragically died in a car
accident. Diana was beloved by the British public, but her two sons were clearly the
most important people in her life. Prince Harry was just 12 years old when his mother
passed, and the tragedy greatly impacted both his emotional health and his relationship
with Queen Elizabeth.
In a book about Harry's life, Finding Freedom, the authors assert that the Queen became "one
of the most important women" in Prince Harry's life. Additionally, her impact wasn't just
limited to the Crown, but extended well beyond her role as a royal. And it's not difficult
to understand why the Queen felt like she needed to step in.
According to Reader's Digest, the day the palace learned of Diana's death was unlike
any other. Queen Elizabeth was awoken in the middle of the night with the news of the car
accident. When the news of her death was confirmed to Prince Charles, Queen Elizabeth watched
as he broke down in tears.
There have been so many rumors of bad blood between Queen Elizabeth, Prince Harry, and
Meghan Markle, but the whispers and gossip about tension and negativity couldn't be further
from the truth.
Royal expert Katie Nicholl told Entertainment Tonight that Queen Elizabeth couldn't have
been more accommodating to Harry and Meghan when they got engaged, and that she was "genuinely
delighted" that Harry had found the person he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.
Nicholl revealed,
"She has said to the couple, 'This is your wedding, this is your day. Plan it as you
want it.' She is thrilled to be seeing Harry settle down and finally marry, she's going
to want to be a very important part of that day and indeed she will."
Nicholl also asserted that in contrast to rumors that the Queen was concerned about
Meghan — about her reputation, career, ethnicity, and past divorce — Queen Elizabeth wasn't
worried in the slightest, and that she trusts Harry.
Weddings can be a super stressful event for folks. And Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's
wedding wasn't just the day that they publicly tied the knot, it was also a celebration for
the entire world. The pressure was on, and the time leading up to the wedding reportedly
led to a lot of strain between Harry and Queen Elizabeth.
As noted by Vanity Fair, a source close to the Queen shared that the monarch became "very
upset" due to "Harry's demands." The source shared,
"He didn't want to use the Queen's staff for the wedding, he and Meghan brought in their
own florist and cake makers, and Harry apparently asked the Archbishop of Canterbury to marry
them before consulting the Queen and the Dean of Windsor, which wasn't the correct way to
do things."
The Queen was reportedly "dismayed by [Harry's] attitude," thinking that he was behaving rather
"beastly." There was also some drama about what tiara Meghan was to wear, which led to
the Queen sitting Harry down for a talk. The source concluded,
"Their relationship was quite badly damaged by it all."
As Prince Harry and Meghan Markle made their presence known in the royal family as a newly
married couple, rumors about frustration and tension only grew. But according to Vanity
Fair, palace sources adamantly defended Queen Elizabeth, and asserted that she'd been nothing
but accommodating and welcoming to the new couple — she even understood why they wanted
to take a step back from their royal duties.
Additionally, the Queen could reportedly tell that Harry and Meghan were finding the pressures
of public life difficult, so she "did not rule out" the idea of them scaling back their
royal responsibilities. A royal source said,
"The Queen is always there to talk about family matters but when it comes to matters of monarchy
and the institution it's not off the cuff. It's not just a case of popping over for tea
to discuss it. Decisions made on things like that have ramifications for three generations
going forward and time was needed to get this right."
Still, despite any rumored tension, Queen Elizabeth and Harry reportedly communicated
about everything.
The rumor that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle surprised the royal family with the news of
their departure from their roles as senior royals circulated for over a year. But when
the couple sat down for an interview with Oprah Winfrey on March 7, 2021, Harry cleared
the air. Harry told Oprah that he didn't surprise the Queen with the news.
"So for the story to come out that he disrespected the queen, that he blindsided the queen, was
very, very troubling to him."
That respect certainly seems to have helped Harry and Meghan in the fallout of their exodus
as well, because despite the gossip about negativity and tension between the couple
and the royal family, it's been asserted that the royals would welcome the couple back in
a heartbeat. Royal commentator Richard Fitzwilliams told Us Weekly,
"The queen has made it absolutely clear that they would always be welcome back if they
had a change of heart."
While the likelihood of that happening is arguably small, it should be noted that there
is genuine respect and transparency between Harry and the Queen.
A lot of attention has been paid to Prince Harry's relationship with his father, Prince
Charles, and his brother, Prince William. The relationships are certainly strained,
but Harry asserted that his relationship with Queen Elizabeth has been positively maintained
throughout all the drama and stress.
Harry told Oprah Winfrey that his grandmother has been "welcoming throughout" this whole
ordeal. He also divulged that he had multiple conversations with the Queen and Charles about
his future in the royal family.
It looks as though the Queen was able to stay above the fray, because her relationship with
Harry remained intact even though the bond between the young prince and his father was
strained. Harry revealed that Charles stopped answering the phone when he called, leaving
Harry feeling "really let down." He told Oprah,
"There's a lot to work through there. Of course, I will always love him, but there's a lot
of hurt that's happened."
In addition to being a beloved monarch, Queen Elizabeth is known as "Gan-Gan" to her great-grandchildren.
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's son, Archie, has interacted with the Queen via Zoom.
Harry told James Corden during a segment on the The Late Late Show that both the Queen
and Prince Philip know how to navigate Zoom. The Queen has "seen Archie running around,"
and has even sent thoughtful gifts to him in California. Harry shared with Corden that
the Queen sent Archie a waffle maker for Christmas, and that the first thing the little guy asks
for in the morning is a waffle.
"Flip it, out it comes. He loves it."
Harry and Meghan have been able to maintain a communicative relationship with the Queen
since their move to the United States, with Meghan sharing with Oprah Winfrey that she's
placed calls to the palace to check in. The couple also has plans, COVID-19 permitting,
to travel to the United Kingdom for the Trooping the Colour ceremony in June
Maintaining any kind of long-distance relationship has been made so much easier with technology;
between phone calls, texts, FaceTime dates, and Zoom sessions, it's easier than ever to
stay in contact with people, regardless of the miles between us. And as noted by Marie
Claire, Prince Harry and Queen Elizabeth have been able to maintain their mentor/mentee
relationship, even though Harry relocated to the United States.
Royal expert Katie Nicholl told the magazine that Harry has stayed in close contact with
other members of his family, most notably the Queen. Harry reportedly still confides
in the Queen, and doesn't hesitate to ask her for her advice. He's also continued to
share his thoughts and plans about his future with his grandmother. Nicholl revealed,
"She is in touch with them, she knows what is going on in their lives, they discuss their
plans with her. Harry has always seen his grandmother as a mentor. While he might be
in LA that has not changed."
Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's sit-down interview with Oprah Winfrey was highly anticipated.
No subject was off-limits, and after years of silence, the two shared some bombshells
during the primetime CBS special.
According to Deadline, Queen Elizabeth was allegedly, quote, "pretty cheesed off" with
the entire interview situation, and made it clear to her staff that she'd be focusing
on her work at hand, not watching the interview. A source said about the situation,
"The mood in the family is: can everyone just shut the hell up and can we just get on with
the day job?'
But despite any frustrations that the interview may have created, the Queen remained adamant
that she won't punish Harry and Meghan. The Sunday Times reported that royal courtiers
suggested potentially taking away Harry and Meghan's titles of Duke and Duchess of Sussex
due to the expository nature of the interview, but according to a close source of the Queen,
that kind of punishment is "not up for debate." Looks like the positive aspects of Harry's
relationship with his grandmother prevailed.
The time following Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's announcement that they'd be leaving
their roles as senior royals was fraught with drama. For one, a public feud between Harry
and Prince William erupted. Additionally, the couple lost their security and moved to
the United States; it seemed like every aspect of their life, royal or otherwise, was uprooted.
But despite any of the negative attention from the public or the press, Harry asserted
that his relationship with Queen Elizabeth is stronger than ever. During his sit-down
interview with Oprah Winfrey, Harry said that the connection between himself and the beloved
monarch is strong.
"My grandmother and I have a really good relationship, and an understanding. And I have a deep respect
for her. She's my colonel in chief, right? She always will be."
As for Harry's relationships with his other family members, including his brother William?
Those aren't as stable, but Harry has hope that things will mend
"I love William to bits. He's my brother. We've been through hell together, and we have
a shared experience."
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