- Think of a word
that you would like a rap about.
And then we're just gonna throw them in one at a time,
and I'll rap.
- Carrot.
- Carrot, yes.
(rapping) The first word from your brain,
so straight, is presumably
because nothing rhymes with orange.
That's the color, never bother.
Yeah, I get it a lot.
I've got the green fluffy top,
maybe like I'm Carrot Top
doing all the physical comedy, and I julienne.
I shave my carrot tiny ribbons again and again.
Get a little Cuisinart,
that's a food mixer.
Chop it up, no risking my fingers.
Addicted to getting all the vitamin A.
What's the word that you say?
- Poppycock.
- (rapping) Coming over here, hip hooray,
get this one a lot.
Got a pen with a jaw.
I'm the British guy talking shit, that poppycock.
Like a little red flower on the end of your penis,
that's a poppycock.
It's obscene, this,
bringing it up.
Yeah, you know what, you chose it.
Take the poppy pollen, I be turning it to opium
like I'm in Afghanistan.
What's my man gonna give?
- Catapult.
- (rapping) Yeah, all you know I'm in a siege,
got a little trebuchet,
shouting out, "Hip Hooray!"
You be in the castle, not for long,
moving out of the way,
taking all the walls down
Like a hundred volts
when I charged fully, bat them around,
and a catapult.
They be struggling.
They be dying.
They be starving.
But me and my army, we charge in.
A smart thing you can get.
A general on the lead
got the catapult.
We leaving all the lead in the siege.
And your turn.
- Quarantine.
- (rapping) Yes, I see.
Locked-down shit.
Two weeks quarantine,
like you're in Walter Reed
like the Pres right now.
Quarantine successful in this town,
so the COVID cases, they were relaxed.
It's on your lungs.
It's a type of respiratory attack.
But we're coming back out of there,
praise be the Queen.
Just have to say that.
Moving from quarantine
to my three guys here
at the end of the row.
We be getting first one from a lovely trio.
- Chartreuse.
- Yeah!
(rapping) Let me take a sip
whether it's green or yellow passing on my lips.
Though the yellow one cat piss,
that be the flavor.
Chartreuse in "The Last Word" for later.
Maybe an aviation if you got the eau de violette.
When it comes to cocktails,
how good can you get?
Made by monks in the French region,
chartreuse in your brain for some reason.
Billboard, top 100.
I can chart you.
Yellow sweater, like the chartreuse, ask you.
Well, you're asking us to do,
cast an eye, light the mass though,
white and cream peach tie-dye.
Coming up, we got two more to go.
- Dwayne the Rock Johnson.
- (rapping) Add it into the flow.
Dwayne the Rock Johnson, hard like metal,
but came out in support of Biden.
People say, "Pebble,
"you are no longer a rock from Hawaii."
He was in "Moana."
All the people crying.
He's so strong and really good looking,
would turn me gay, that's what The Rock's cooking.
Sorry, white film men on the camera there.
Last one from the last with the auburn hair.
What's it gonna to be?
I like the camera and you see,
when you're in France, in gay Paris,
I'll take a chance at once.
I'd be ordering croissants.
It's hard in America,
the words to pronounce.
You might look at me slightly askance
if I say it in French,
'cause that's not croissant.
(crowd applauding)
- That was so good!
- Make it big time.
- Thank you.
Have a little rummage, get something ready.
Um, let's do this.
(orchestral music)
(rap music)
(rapping) Beats drops, then I go.
Green with a little prison poblano.
Feeling very spicy here, we need succeed.
When you slice it, roast with the seeds.
Coming from Mexico or maybe new.
I don't even know.
Larger chili, who?
Ooh, whipping it out out like a big guy.
Oh yeah, put out your eye.
Any more things in there?
We said, got a different color from green, then red.
That's green and go, then red, then stop.
No problemo.
Yeah, kick back like a skeleton there
in the chair with the jar.
Tiny little thing.
Oh, toma-to.
Feed it to your kids.
If you want the flavor, get heritage.
What the heck is this?
Let me see.
Will not touch it, mate.
You agree.
You say wax?
Why the fuck would you have that here?
Unless your trucks on your skateboard need waxing.
Won't touch it without asking.
Don't want that contact, want that handle,
get that wax with a wick for a candle.
Yeah.
The man with the charm
got best sock in his nice cold hand,
showing the sole, and we see he's dirty
getting the weave on there kind of 30 months old.
Probably you got a nice little mascot.
Is it good to see
that you've got a variety?
Don't stop and think.
Got in the orange and white and then pink.
Also wax, and I thought it was quartz.
Everybody get with the skateboards.
Let me look at your little wrist with the turquoise.
Coming over there and your name.
I'm not annoyed.
Kate is your name.
That's K-A-T-E.
I hope that we all agree.
Not a friendship bracelet from your friend.
I'm a guy driving shit round the bend.
Yeah, jumping out the waves like a motion.
See a little shark saying, "Protect the ocean."
He got the shades and their inhabitants.
And it's written like straight lines happening.
What's below that?
I can't even see.
Don't wanna touch that chest,
no, please.
Touching the nipples would be inappropriate.
Any more things that you get.
You've got a bike on the bag,
and it's going well.
On the other side, logo says Chanel.
Maybe now, wait, that's on your necklace.
If I'm on a bike then I win that race.
Like Queen, "Fat Bottomed Girls."
If you don't know the song,
that's the worst in the world.
Last in.
On the top of you is something something made do
but Salty Crew.
Feel the shots in the C.I.A. Schumer.
Sailing by when I'm all there in the schooner.
Getting the shark and the fin from the tuna.
Make it to soup, and I wish I'd done sooner.
Casting the net, and I'm casting the line.
Salty Crew right on the top of your mind.
There we go, yeah, that's the end of the rap
with the face mask covered with the map.
Boom.
(crowd cheers)
- That's so good.
- Thank you.
I'm glad you liked it.
Gonna drop a beat.
Give me, give me a first word to go on.
Whoever's got a first word.
- Chickens.
- Chickens, kay.
(rap music)
(rapping) The debut,
the first word you said,
that's the answer to the question.
The chicken or the egg, cause it came first,
that's the question.
It's clever.
I see a little chicken
with the shit and its feathers in the yard
pecking round for the corn.
Rooster crowing early
in the morn to warn
that you've gotta wake it up.
Mm, let me get the volt.
If you're on the flotilla, then you're chilling on the boat
in the Caribbean or maybe Tahiti.
I've got my own yacht,
not a dinghy, robber of a ocean,
like I'm floating in the motion.
I see it causing a commotion.
Need a little chocolate chip.
Need a little bit of wheat.
Need a bit of eggs.
That's a tasty snack to eat.
Let me get a little cookie, and I might risk it.
In Britain we don't say that,
we say biscuit.
I know over here, that's a different type of thing.
Whip it out like a little bit a rope that stings.
Let me drop it in the road.
So it's got a ring.
Aah, a donut.
That's the whole thing.
That's a little homonym.
That's a little pun.
If I get a little donut, then it's yummy in my tum.
Wanna bit of powdered sugar, wanna bit of glazing,
but the donuts from over there, so amazing.
Keep the words flowing as we're going, take your lick.
And we'd be going back to the man
who'd be spitting bout the chicken.
- Masks.
- (rapping) Is the hope that you'll be smitten.
I'm so glad you asked.
Stopping all the spread
of the COVID with the mask.
I'll be taking you to task
if you're not wearing one.
If you've got a cough, better put one on.
And in areas like Taiwan and South Korea,
they always had the masks dangling from around their ears.
But more recent over here.
Now we feel.
I've keep the shit rolling
like Limp Biztik or a wheel.
Limp Biztik, I meant Limp Bizkit.
Back to the cookie.
If I see a wheel invented like, "Ooh, ee."
I'm the first guy to invent the 360,
nice little shape, one edge.
That's free sling.
Keep it going, what was it?
- Exhaust.
- You asked.
Okay, I thought you said, "My ex's ass."
That was a weird thing.
Nah, it's par for the course,
pumping out the gas from my muffler and exhaust.
Get a little muffler.
Keep it quiet,
because the motorbikes when they ride, not silent.
They're so loud, pumping out the back of gasoline.
One last one from the team,
and a dream of a snow-capped peak
burst like a fountain.
Call me Edmund Hillary.
I'm clambering the mountain.
I'm right up the top of K2.
And I say too.
All you guys there, I rap till my face is blue.
(crowd applauds)
So collecting comics, Spartan mascot, speech therapist,
dairy and gluten free.
- Yeah.
- And loud dogs in the background.
Okay, this is a freestyle.
All made up, not written, not rehearsed.
Let's, uh, let's do this.
(rapping) Rhyming with with no script, edges seem scary.
The only thing you gotta skip be the dairy.
Of course you get a soup, "Ah, a crouton!
"I can't consume that," "Why?"
It contains gluten.
I'm shooting the way to shoot and know the chef.
If you're bringing me the cheese,
then I'm asking you the test.
Did you listen what I ordered?
I don't want these.
Produce from the cow, it scares me.
Also makes my tummy wrong,
also makes my celiac attack.
You can get the tummy cancer
and you can't flip it back, unless they get a cure.
Maybe you can try and help.
If I see a tiny tyke, a tiny little whelp coming in,
I say, "Yo, what's up, sir?"
He says, "I've got a problem.
"You know that I stutter."
You can make sure he can help and improve,
resist all the stutter,
speech therapists move
like Biden on podium when he's in debate.
I know the letter B and letter D's the one he hates,
which is inconvenient, because it's in his name.
What's your favorite superhero, one that spits flames?
Human Flame, Fantastic Four, nah.
We don't need these guys.
See, the worst losers, screw all of the DC.
I might befriend you
if I said I knew Avengers, going off to Marvel.
I'll be gathering November
when it's Comic-Con time.
Getting all the mint condition,
put a little plastic slip on.
I never miss them.
And if I had detective comics that they sold one,
you know I've got the money at an eBay auction.
Getting all of that, my pockets no longer,
spartan and empty.
Yes, you know, we're starting to go to Michigan State.
I think that's what you said.
A Spartan warrior,
you put the mascot on your head,
walking around upon the field like hip hip hooray.
Cheer for the Spartans every day.
We're gonna strike hard, like lightning and thunder.
The only thing I know about Sparta from "300."
That's the movie from a comic book
adapted for the big screen.
What are the colors of the state?
White and green.
Also the Nigerian flag, but I assume you're not from there.
There we go,
a freestyle rap for the lady with bun hair.
- Aah, good job.
- Woo!
- Thank you.
Thank you, guys.
Thank you.
I'm glad you liked it.
It's a fun thing to do.
I feel the people in the back of the line
are very confused now.
(crowd laughs)
We will, we'll come and rap for you guys.
The terrible twos, bicycles, University of Arizona,
and being in the U.S. for being from the UK.
(rapping) A freestyle for the ladies already seen this.
I'm firing up like the weather in Phoenix.
Living there in the past,
that's, you had your home there.
That's the university,
the state of Arizona.
Never visited.
I'm inquisitive to do so.
If I travel south from here,
and you do, bro,
reach there soon.
Off to the uni.
You can study all the things.
Screw SUNY, State University of New York.
It's much colder over there.
If you walk the walk,
let me ask you, why you throwing tantrums?
There's no answer.
They're just 24 months old.
Pull your pants up.
Annoying child, throwing all the wobblers.
Terrible twos, it be annoying.
The toddler's walking around saying, "Mum, I need a wee,"
but then he already did himself naturally.
They gotta learn to ride a bike at that age,
but they'd fall off, no stabilizers, feeling rage.
What's the problem with the kids?
Why they throw these?
All the hormones
when they chew, they teethe, on their mouth.
Need to get their little tooth growing through.
Moving from a country which begins with a U
to another one.
Both of them are united.
I've got a visa.
I was totally invited.
Don't throw me out.
Please don't call ICE.
Improvements from the UK?
The weather is nice,
and if you get a serving of food, you can eat it twice.
Leftovers, more calories advised.
Anybody in the UK to visit over here, it's great.
Even though you gotta be older to drink beer,
and that's the real problem,
less you got the ID,
but I can get that.
Yeah, please remind me.
Was there any more things that we needed to do?
Nah, we nailed that stuff
like the sprig on a stew.
Get the mint, that's the top,
that's the rap that you heard.
So many lenses on your phone.
There we go.
That's served.
(speaking) There you go.
Oh, thank you very much, guys.
This is a rap about too many ineffective rules.
People don't care about the environment or other people.
College is too expensive.
Zoom.
And was there one that had any others,
or was that all of them?
- Too many rules?
- Too many rules, great.
I'm gonna drop a beat.
It's gonna be a real aggro rap.
We're gonna get up in the face of that.
Let's do it.
(rapping) Sit down.
I'm speaking to fools.
I'm saying got to redactively reduce the rules.
What's the problem?
So many rules and we got them.
I need to rewind up like cotton on a reel.
Let me tell you how I feel.
I'm looking over there,
see all the trees on the hill.
All of them cutting down, going higher.
Coming down, all the forests with forest fires.
Like what?
Need to stop the global warming.
Let me sound out like Greta Thunberg warning from Sweden.
Yeah, she has Asperger's.
She coming over here.
Yeah, this world should be like, "What?"
Why am I in this room?
Trying to go study but I gotta be Zoom.
Everyone there with the internet connection.
Need a little problem,
let me get selection of better internet.
Getting that cable.
Teacher on there, he unstable.
Shouting to me, and I'm raising my hand.
I be like, "These guys don't understand."
I'm in college.
Gotta be confined to my place.
Can't get close in anybody's face.
Can't go to bars, well, technically,
probably underage, not 23
or 21, but there we go.
I encounter people all over the world.
They're like, "What?"
Tell you, man, let me spit the truth.
I don't give a damn.
Like what?
Where's your empathy?
It should be in you.
It's meant to be.
I'm bringing a politeness.
You sent for me,
coming from Britain like overseas.
Last one that we needed to do.
Give me the word, I'm reminding of you.
Any other thing that you wanna throw in?
You can throw one word in the rap that I'm spitting.
Just anything now.
Shout it out please.
- Fury.
- Yeah.
I do adore these.
Let me kick off righteous fury.
F-U-R-I have enough fun.
Furious, cutting tips off like Amazons
when I'm over there.
Yeah, we assuming.
Furious are eating my breasts, I'm brewing.
Need to go out, get a little meditation,
get the anger management situation, please.
Everybody calm down.
There we go.
The rap's spit in this town.
Thanks for watching.
Please do like and subscribe,
and check it out another one of my freestyle videos.
Thank you.
Well, you've got me really angry, so uh--
(crowd laughs)
That's what happened.
Yeah, yeah. (growls)
Revolution!