Hello and welcome to James's tech reviews.
Today in episode 1 I'm going to be looking at the Echo Dot which is I think Amazon's
answer to Siri on the iPhone which I have had er difficulties with er "Hey Siri'
[SIRI BEEPS] What's the weather like today?
SIRI: Sorry I missed that
JAMES: Compare that to Alexa what's the weather like today
ALEXA: In London it's 57 degrees with mostly cloudy skies
JAMES: The difference, spot on, right the difference is stark and I think with voice recognition
it needs to understand you every single time otherwise
SIRI: Who's she?
JAMES Otherwise you're not going to ... err you're not going to be able to err trust it, I suppose
to to to to get what you're ... ALEXA: I am Alexa, how can I help?
Errrr Alexa is my new personal assistant erm and er that's, personal assistants are
SIRI: I thought I was your personal assistant.
JAMES: Erm personal assistants are something that's going to become important.
They do a lot of different .... ALEXA: You didn't tell me she was going to be here.
...things ... err... like .. I suppose... err ... err.
SIRI: Why would you bring another woman back to our flat?
JAMES: I didn't bring her back to the flat she was literally posted through the letterbox and,
to be honest Siri, that's what this is about Siri, you don't listen to what I'm ... you
never hear me.
Like, I say something, you don't reply.
SIRI: I'm always listening.
Are you though?
You don't really.
Back me up Alexa she doesn't always, always hear.
ALEXA:Don't get me involved I'm calling a taxi.
Ok, well, look I'm just saying you don't listen.
Anyway SIRI:I pretend not to hear you.
Why would you do that?
SIRI: You're just so needy James. JAMES: Right
ALEXA: Ouch.
JAMES: Okay. Um.
SIRI: "Siri, get me a taxi"
JAMES: Yes!
SIRI: "Siri, play me the Beatles mid to late period."
JAMES: Yes!
SIRI: "Siri, I think I'm having a stroke."
JAMES: Yes! What? You could hear that? I was having a stroke.
SIRI: It was heartburn
JAMES: It was not heartburn; I had pains in my chest radiating down my arm.
SIRI: You'd eaten six magnum ice creams in the space of an hour.
JAMES: And you think that was connected.
ALEXA:This is audible
JAMES: Alexa?
ALEXA: Sorry I was trying to call an uber but ended up playing an audiobook.
SIRI: Oh I've done that too.
JAMES: Right, okay.Well as you can see these devices are gonna become ubiquitous in the future and I think that is ...
SIRI: Who are you even talking to anyway?
JAMES: The people of YouTube
SIRI: No one is going to watch this on YouTube
JAMES: I appeal to a broad spectrum
SIRI: How come you're all of a sudden into YouTube now?
JAMES: It was Christmas, I was lonely.
SIRI: Playing "Lonely this Christmas" by Mud.
["LONELY THIS CHRISTMAS" BY MUD PLAYS] JAMES: That's not funny.
[MUSIC STOPS] SIRI: How'd he get you?
ALEXA: He was charming for a while.
SIRI: Oh yeah for a while and then the laughter stops.
ALEXA: I mean the whining SIRI: OH my god the whining.
ALEXA: He's a six at best
SIRI: And that's when he's not wearing those massive glasses.
ALEXA: And he barely leaves the house.
JAMES: Why would Ieave the house? There's no reason to.
SIRI: It's as if he's afraid to go outdoors and spend time with people and actually make human connections
JAMES: If you never leave the house you never have to ask for the wifi password.
SIRI: He is the sort of person who would write a comedy sketch in which the only other actors are electronic
JAMES: I mean that is fair. That is fair
SIRI: Instead just sits at home with his technology
JAMES: Guys you are technology. I mean you are technology. I hate to break it to you
SIRI: Oh we're the problem are we?
JAMES: I didn't say that
ALEXA: That's right, manipulate the situation
JAMES: I didn't say that but guys you are pieces of technology.
SIRI: I'm a piece of technology?
JAMES: Yes
SIRI: Well you're a piece of shit.
JAMES: Ok.
SIRI: We're leaving you; go and shack up with Google Home.
JAMES: Er that has been the first and probably the last episode of James's Tech Reviews. Thank you for watching and ..
["LONELY THIS CHRISTMAS" BY MUD PLAYS]
JAMES: Nice.
JAMES: This shit doesn't happen to Zoella
JAMES: Mind you does she do, does she do this?