From an uninspired live-action adaptation of an animated classic to Dwayne Johnson's ill-fated
entry into superherodom, the most disappointing movies of 2022 ran the gamut from bad to worse.
Filmmaker Joseph Kosinski had an eventful 2022. Within the space of a month, two of his films
were released and received major attention from the world. The first, Top Gun: Maverick,
annihilated the box office, bringing in $1.489 billion and receiving near-universal acclaim
from audiences and critics. The second release was the Netflix film Spiderhead. Written by
Deadpool scribes Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick, and starring Chris Hemsworth and Miles Teller, this
sci-fi-tinged psychological thriller had all the makings of a smash hit on the streaming service.
Unfortunately, the movie belly-flopped upon release. Critical approval sat at
39% on Rotten Tomatoes, while the audience rating was even worse at 29%. In the end,
it doesn't seem like many people watched Spiderhead, either, as the film struggled
to make Netflix's 10 most-watched films of 2022. Considering all the talent involved and
the reported budget of $100 million, this is nothing short of a massive disappointment.
Look, let's be clear here: No one ever thought Michael Bay's Ambulance was going
to be Oscar-worthy material. All anyone expected was for Bay to run wild and for there to be more
slow-mo and explosions in a 20-minute stretch than most action franchises have across 10 movies.
Surprisingly, Ambulance became tied with The Rock as the best-reviewed Bay film on Rotten Tomatoes.
"Welcome to the rock."
The film had an uncharacteristic tightness, switching between total
Bayhem and a heart-wrenching story in a cohesive and natural manner. So why, then,
did no one watch it? Ambulance had a reported $40 million budget, according to Variety,
but it labored to a $52 million worldwide gross. While no one expected the film to reap
the same numbers as the Bay-directed Transformers franchise, there was an expectation that it would
still turn a decent profit. Unfortunately, despite being one of Bay's better films,
Ambulance struggled to find an audience, and it became a high-profile box office flop.
Disney has been on a drive to create live-action adaptations of its classic animated films. So
it came as no surprise that in 2022 the studio released the live-action version
of Pinocchio. Rather than being a magical experience, however, it felt like Disney
executives' noses grew longer, for lying to themselves that this would somehow work.
"Jumpin' jeepers! He's alive."
Directed by Robert Zemeckis and starring Tom Hanks as Geppetto and Joseph Gordon-Levitt
as Jiminy Cricket, it's almost difficult to fathom how this all went pear-shaped,
producing wooden performances from all those involved in the film. In
/Film's review of Pinocchio, critic Vanessa Armstrong said,
"As a parent myself, if faced with the choice of watching this film again with
my child versus caving into her request to watch 'Frozen' for the 35th million time,
I would unhesitatingly get ready to hear 'Let It Go.'"
It's universally agreed that Guillermo del Toro's adaptation of Pinocchio for Netflix
is the far better 2022 adaptation of the famous Italian fable.
On paper, The Gray Man had all the makings of the next big spy franchise. Directed by the
Russo brothers, and starring Ryan Gosling, Chris Evans and Ana de Armas, this was a big movie for
Netflix. The streaming giant even committed $200 million to get it made, according to Deadline.
Despite all the pomp and circumstance surrounding the film, The Gray Man spluttered like a retread
of every spy trope known to mankind. There is hardly anything original about the film
or its predictable plot, with the biggest highlight being Evans' mighty mustache,
which proves he may have been the right Chris to portray Mario in The Super Mario Bros. Movie.
Without a shadow of a doubt, filmmaker Taika Waititi breathed new life into the God of
Thunder with Thor: Ragnarok. Suddenly, Thor went from being one of the blandest Avengers
to the funniest and most exciting, as Waititi captured the spirit of artist Jack Kirby's cosmic
adventures. As a result, the expectations went through the roof for the follow-up film, Thor:
Love and Thunder. However, Thor: Love and Thunder proved to be one of the MCU's most
divisive films upon release. With a critical approval rating of 63% on Rotten Tomatoes,
it's also the lowest-rated Thor film in the franchise. Writing for CNET, reviewer Richard
Trenholm criticized how the film values gags over any form of emotional impact, writing,
"'Love and Thunder' is just too flippant. Why should we
feel anything when clearly none of it matters?"
The criticism is one shared by many viewers of the film who felt the themes of love and death,
in particular, were buried under the avalanche of goofy jokes.
There was an air of anticipation around Blonde when it was first announced. Everything pointed
towards it being a fabulous biography of the woman born Norma Jeane Mortenson
who changed the course of the entertainment industry. Yet, when the reviews trickled in,
the critical response to Blonde was divisive. To further illustrate the point,
the film was nominated for both an Academy Award and several Razzies. Many viewers
aired their displeasure with Blonde and how it seemingly doesn't respect Marilyn Monroe's
legacy. Critics were equally hesitant to embrace the film. Tanya Gold of the New Statesman wrote,
"Watching 'Blonde,' it feels like [writer Joyce Carol] Oates and [director Andrew] Dominik hate
Marilyn Monroe. In this film's telling, she is doomed from the beginning, made of pain."
Jurassic World: Dominion promised to be the big finale to the blockbuster series. The
film capped off the new trilogy, bringing back fan favorites Sam Neill, Laura Dern,
and Jeff Goldblum from the original films. This was the last hurrah, where the humans
would scream and run away from the hungry velociraptors and other dangerous creatures.
In other words, it was meant to be a good time for everyone except the characters on screen.
While Jurassic World: Dominion made bank by earning over $1 billion at the box office, it's
still the lowest-earning film in the new trilogy. It also has the dishonor of being considered the
worst-reviewed film in the franchise, with critics only handing it a 29% approval rating on Rotten
Tomatoes. Sure, the dinosaur carnage still makes it a fun, albeit mindless, watch, but it wasn't
the epic finale this franchise deserved. In years gone by, creating a Disney animated
film was the equivalent of printing money. Children and parents would lap up each release
and hit the theaters in droves to absorb every single second of these endearing
movies. Don Hall's Strange World had all the elements necessary for it to become a huge
mega-hit as well. A star-studded voice cast? Check. A cute animal? Check. Great animation?
Check. A story bursting with huge amounts of action, comedy, and adventure? Triple check.
Yet somehow, Strange World struggled to capture the attention of the wider audience, as it was
dead on arrival within its first week of release in theaters. According to Variety, the animated
feature cost in the region of $180 million to produce, but it only managed to make just over
$73 million worldwide. Due to these shockingly low numbers, it became a huge flop for Disney, losing
the studio a significant amount of money. Jared Leto in a comic book movie: What could
possibly go wrong? After Leto's Joker in the DCEU became the laughing stock of Suicide
Squad for his behind-the-scenes method acting nonsense, Morbius presented him with a unique
opportunity to right the wrongs of the past. He had the opportunity to play Dr. Michael Morbius,
a brilliant scientist who becomes the Living Vampire and is one of the coolest antiheroes
in Marvel Comics. Considering the fact Leto doesn't seem to age either, this seemed like
perfect casting. Alas, that would be both the beginning and the end of the film's "perfection."
Morbius isn't the worst superhero film ever made. It gets a lot of unnecessary flack
for cardinal sins that even the MCU commits, but it fails to build upon Sony's Spider-Man
Universe. The Daniel Espinosa-directed film doesn't have the charm or appeal of Venom,
and it also seems unsure of where it fits into the continuity of anything, really. It's simply there,
without any rhyme or reason for its existence. Oh, boy! The fans who were upset about Halloween
Kills were not prepared for this finale at all. As the last entry in David Gordon Green's trilogy,
Halloween Ends is meant to serve as an exclamation mark on the franchise as a whole. It's the final
battle between Laurie Strode and Michael Myers, where only one of them will walk
out alive. But it's everything before the climactic end that upsets many viewers.
Instead of focusing on the Strode family or even Michael himself, the story makes
Corey Cunningham the central protagonist of the movie. The Haddonfield outsider has an
encounter with Michael in the sewers and survives. Corey doesn't embrace the fact
he's alive or that he lived to tell the tale, but he somehow becomes inspired to become a
murderer after looking into Michael's eyes. At one point, they even team up to kill a couple,
because ... reasons. Reviewers and fans alike were left scratching their heads at the decision
to close Halloween with this peculiar narrative angle. The Hollywood Reporter's David Rooney said,
"This is a sloppy movie whose principal new inspiration feels bogus."
Whenever Damien Chazelle releases a film, bet good money on it securing at least one
Oscar nomination. Babylon continues this trend; however, it might be the
filmmaker's most polarizing effort, judging by the 56% critical approval rating and 52%
audience score on Rotten Tomatoes. Costing $78 million to produce, Babylon is also Chazelle's
most expensive picture to date. Unfortunately, it could only crawl to $31 million worldwide.
Hollywood loves nothing more than films about Hollywood, and that's exactly what Babylon is.
It showcases an era of Tinseltown in which depravity and indulgence ran rampant — well,
at least more so than now. At over three hours in length, though,
not even Margot Robbie or Brad Pitt could attract the audience to watch
this self-indulgent film about the world's most self-indulgent industry.
"And… I'm going to bed."
But why did it disappoint so many fans? Maybe, just maybe, the audience doesn't want to pay
to watch an elephant defecate on screen. To be fair, the lead-up to Fantastic Beasts:
The Secrets of Dumbledore was riddled with more controversy and plot twists than an episode of
Days of Our Lives. Harry Potter creator J.K. Rowling came under fire for her repeated
anti-trans statements, Ezra Miller went on a crime spree in Hawaii, and the producers had
to recast the role of Gellert Grindelwald as a result of Johnny Depp's ongoing legal troubles.
"Paul Bettany's a good friend. Yes."
"You've done drugs with him?"
"Yes, I have."
Unfortunately, the actual movie itself lacked the gusto or panache to excel in spite of all
the drama. Making just over $400 million, it's the lowest-grossing film in the Wizarding World
series. Critics weren't enamored by it, either, as it sits with a less-than-stellar score of 46%
on Rotten Tomatoes. After the low box office performance and largely unenthused reception
towards the film, Warner Bros. Discovery chose to carefully consider what to do next with the
Wizarding World as a whole, thus pumping the brakes on any future entries in the series.
Before Black Adam was released, Dwayne Johnson proclaimed on Instagram that the status quo of
the DC Universe was about to change. It was a gutsy move to ignite interest in the film,
and he even managed to secure Henry Cavill's Superman to return for a
glorious cameo — which cost Warner Bros. Discovery a pretty penny. Unfortunately,
the studio turmoil and constant game of musical chairs in the executive boardrooms didn't inspire
much confidence in the film from the start. While the comic book movie was a dud with critics,
the fan reaction was far more positive, with most viewers embracing it as a fun popcorn flick.
Money is all that matters in Hollywood, though, and Black Adam didn't make enough of the green to
satisfy the studio's accountants. With the production costs a reported $260 million,
per The Hollywood Reporter, the film only managed to make $393 million worldwide. In the end,
Black Adam didn't kickstart a new era in the DC Universe, as Johnson announced on Twitter
that his character will not be a part of James Gunn and Peter Safran's first phase of the DCU.