This might be an obvious one.
"Why are coping skills important in recovery?"
Blu Robinson is an expert in recovery.
Let's ask him.
Okay, Blu.
I set you up, man.
You're the expert.
Coping skills, talk to us about that.
-Coping skills with addiction are kind of interesting.
Personally with I like to look at it.
Because the addiction actually started as what they thought and perceived was a coping
skills.
-It was a coping skill to start with.
-It was.
Thinking that something was going to help them either avoid distract or feel better
because of a problem or trauma.
These kind of behaviors tat we start using and start kind of manifesting in our lives,
the addiction begins to pour in.
And we forget that there really are other helping, coping skills out there that don't
resolve of being locked up in jail or get kicked out at your house.
-There's some healthy ones.
-There are.
So, team Addict To Athlete, one of the coping skills that we want to focus on is becoming
a productive and more healthy individual.
By doing these concepts of working out, being able to eat right, being able to socialize...
These concepts that we've discovered have been really good at building our team.
But it come with a lot of coping skills.
Things like running.
Being able to get your blood moving and blood pressure going and getting some vitamin D
outside.
All the way down to talking about your problems with the team captain, coach or colleague.
These coping skills are some of the foundational ones that we found work really well in trying
to let go of the old and bringing the new.
-I think you said something that was so powerful when you acknowledge that many addictions
are an attempt at coping with emotions that can become overwhelming.
Or with feelings that were uncomfortable with.
In fact, most of the addictive patterns that I'm familiar with is a psychologist are for
that purpose.
It's for changing your mood.
How you feel.
-Yeah.
Absolutely.
You look at an infant, babies.
Babies crying, the first thing to do is get the binky in there that starts calming that
child down.
They begin to soothe with that.
And then one day, when you realize the child is getting older, you take it away.
What happens?
-Freak out!
-They freak out.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
-Actually, you know what?
I have to mention this because we did a video here on the channel "How to not freak out?"
And you can link to it right up there in that corner.
That will bring up the video for you to watch next after Blu and I are done with this conversation.
"How to not freak out?"
It's kind of what we're talking about.
-It really is.
Absolutely.
So, you take the binky away, the baby freaks out.
And then after a while, something magical happens.
The baby begins to self-soothe.
It might take a while, it might to take a day or 2.
Maybe it'll take a week.
But eventually with a little bit of a help from the parents, the baby begins to self-soothe.
They begin to do it on their own.
Now, in drug addiction.
We try to bring in outside chemicals or pornography or gambling or even working out, an athletics
to self soothe.
And it doesn't quite fill the void.
It doesn't work because of the after effects.
-Right.
There is skill-set I think that gets to be developed.
We're talking about coping skills.
Think of skills as something you get to (first) choose and then practice.
-Practice.
-It doesn't just automatically get installed in your psyche.
-No.
-You're going to have to practice it.
-Absolutely.
I saw a meme today on the internet that was kind of funny.
It grabbed my attention.
It said, "If running is hard, keep doing it.
It'll get easy."
And that's true, right?
You've got to keep doing it.
But even running as a foundation of what team addict to athlete does, is to be able to kind
of move your mind.
It's kind of what that EMDR therapy is.
It's a certain way of stimulating the right and left brain and processing what's going
on inside your head.
Even go on for a walk will do that same thing.
It's a great coping skill because of all physical nature.
The attitude you're bringing in and moving away from the problem.
And having a solution and coming back to it.
Coping skills might just be the fundamentals.
You know, like when you're putting a sport.
-Oh, yeah.
-I remember a story of Vince Lombardi.
Legendary football coach.
And as he brought his team together first of every season, he would produce a football
and he would hold it out in front of all of those men and say, "Gentlemen, this is a football."
They knew what it was, right?
But he's starting with the basics.
And what I love about this conversation Blu, we're going to get back to the basics.
-That's exactly right.
-About how human beings operate.
You are feeling individually.
You're going to feel some stuff.
-Absolutely.
-And if you're doing it right, you're going to feel some painful stuff.
And some pleasant stuff.
And some kind of a neutral stuff.
Well, we get freaked out about the painful stuff.
And at the end of the day, here's my version of "Gentlemen, this is a football."
-What?
-Feelings change.
And you're going to have a whole variety of feelings.
You don't have to prevent yourself from feeling pain.
And I think that realization alone is going to be huge.
Then you can build coping skills for when you feel pain.
Not if...
Did you hear that wording?
-Absolutely.
-When you feel pain, what are you going to do?
You're saying exercise, take a walk, eat well, get enough sleep.
-Absolutely.
-Gentlemen, this is a football.
-You can find someone you trust.
Someone that can help give you some neutral feedback.
Because the impulse is to right and to try to avoid the pain.
You'll learn from that pain.
If you learn to enjoy the suffering, it'll help the coping skills really take hold and
take place.
-Now, you're talking crazy.
-Yeah.
-Enjoy the suffering?
-Because it doesn't ever last.
It will pass.
And if we react properly and we use coping skills at work in a healthy way, it will pass
and we'll be stronger because of it.
-We get stories in our head that do not help us when it comes to addiction.
And when you said "enjoy"...
Okay, what!?
"I'm feeling pain.
I'm suppose to enjoy this?"
-Enjoy this.
-Well, yes.
Because joy...
I think a joyful experience in life includes a complete spectrum of all of the feelings
that we get to have as human beings.
You know a great example of this, Blu?
A funeral.
-Yeah.
Absolutely.
-You and I have some common acquaintances of we both attended the funerals.
And the only reason you feel pain at the funeral is because you had joy and love in life.
-Absolutely.
If you didn't have those, it wouldn't have the pain.
So, head up, folks.
Pain is not bad.
Pain is part of your experience.
So, coping skills are all about "What am I going to do when?"
-Yeah.
And really, when you get deep into your arsenal coping skills, you'll have a real strong outlook
for whatever come down the flat line on how to solve it and how to move forward through
it.
-Absolutely.
Thanks for watching this episode.
I love it when Blu comes to visit.
Blu, thanks for coming.
-You're welcome, thank you.
-Blu is a licensed Live On Purpose certified coach.
He's also an addictions counselor and the founder of addict to athlete.
Tell our viewers real quick about that resource and how they can connect to it.
-Absolutely.
Addict to athlete is an online program.
You can get a lot of resources, questions to ask by following us at addicttoathlete.org.
All of our information is on there.