In a world run solely on rationality, the INTJ’s approach to love would be considered
foolproof. With clear-cut goals and definitive plans for reaching them,
sometimes this logical type may overlook the affection and connection that goes into romance,
leaving them rather oblivious. But that’s not the only reason some INTJs prefer to stay single..
Welcome or welcome back psychos! Today’s video is all about the reasons some single INTJs wouldn’t
want it any other way. But before we get into it, we’d love it if you liked and subscribe
to our channel, as well as to click the post notification bell so you never miss a video!
Alright, lets jump right into the video starting with:
Number 1: They’ve given up
Settling down with a partner sounds nice to most people with this curious personality type,
but when it comes down to actually getting to know someone to make that happen, things can be
particularly challenging. In fact, finding someone worth getting to know is this introvert's first
challenge, and having such particular standards doesn’t always help their chances. And so,
to put it simply, the whole idea of romance can just seem too overwhelming for the sensible INTJ.
Most particularly after a failed attempt or two, INTJs may be interrupted by their logic
questioning if it’s worth all the time and effort they were originally ready to put in. Luckily,
they usually remain open-minded, should something (or in this case someone) cross their path.
Number 2: Long term connections seem to get boring
Okay, let’s just start by saying all romantic connections have their moments of adventure
and stagnancy. But in this case, when it comes to long term commitments and connections in relation
to the INTJ, things can get a little iffy. In fact, some INTJs report being in a relationship
for a few years and still not feeling 100% sure about the long term aspect of things.
With independence and determination at the forefront of most of their decisions,
INTJs will notice stagnancy sooner than most types. It’s not necessarily that they get bored
of their partner, but they can easily get bored of just being in a relationship for the heck of it.
If they feel like they’re being held back from executing their elaborate plans for success,
then they may just see that the more logical thing to do
is to remain single until they feel more ready. Which bring is to our next point..
Number 3: They don’t want to feel obligated Like we said, INTJs don’t dabble in the
dating game just for the sake of it being the next step society is expecting them to take.
While it may seem like the logical thing to do if you’re looking to settle down and start a family,
INTJs have logic of their own that goes against these societal structures. But for the INTJ who
has numerous goals and plans of their own, they ultimately strive to do things their own way, and
that includes finding someone when THEY feel it’s the time. In fact, INTJs can see the flaws
and incompatibilities within their friends and family’s relationships more than others. They
absorb these understandings to the point that when it comes to weighing out their pros and
cons of stepping into the dating realm, the latter sounds much more appealing, objectively of course.
Number 4: They’re too fixated on finding the right person
Some INTJs are fully open to finding someone, but simply feel overwhelmed by the idea of it.
Like we just said, this analytical type can easily see the discrepancies in other romantic
relationships. In turn, they use this knowledge to decipher what they want and don’t want when in
their own romantic connections. However, this only encourages the logical aspect of things,
because now that they know what they want, they need to go and find it.
And for the INTJ who uses evidence-based evaluation, they can easily overlook
people with awesome partner-potential simply because they didn’t match a logical criteria.
Approaching love with rational thinking can certainly pay off in certain aspects of things,
but ultimately, love is spontaneous and unpredictable. They can get so wrapped
up in finding a partner that they forget the fact that love is inherently imperfect
or that it requires building and mistake-making in order for a genuine connection to flourish.
Number 5: They don’t want the criticism that comes from romance
Most INTJs know it about themselves or have at least heard it from a past partner.. Their
demeanor can seem rather aloof, disinterested and insensitive at times. And with that usually
comes a lot of criticisms and expectations for improvement from their partners who crave the more
love-dovey aspects of romance. Besides the fact that INTJs are more intune with using rationality
over feelings and emotions, they personally have another take on this lack of affection.
According to personalitycafe.com, one INTJ said “The difficult part, for me,
was increasing my capacity for feelings in general.
A glass can only spill what it contains. I had always been so disconnected and
isolated from others that, even though I loved her with my whole heart, my heart wasn't very big. It
took me the entire 4 years of our relationship to build up what I consider "normal" human emotions.”
Number 6: They’re much happier with friendships
INTJs are awesome friends. With little-to-no affection or feelings involved, they can
easily get along with others, preferring to keep a smaller group of like-minded people around.
In fact, because of their introverted and seemingly reserved nature, some would think that
INTJs would be rather antisocial. However, nothing excites an INTJ more than finding someone that
thinks similarly to them, whom they can bounce their most elaborate ideas off of. It becomes much
easier to get along with people knowing there are no strings attached. So, when an INTJ is
content with their small group of intellectual equals, it can be difficult to imagine giving
up their limited free time for a romantic connection. Ironically, in most cases, INTJs
will end up in the happiest relationships with the person they first befriended for some time.
Number 7: They’re too focused on their career
If there’s one personality type that would happily prioritize work over love, it would
be the single INTJ. Besides the fact that they fully invest themselves into their performance,
INTJs get a sense of fulfillment from using their problem-solving and perfectionism strengths.
However, most people with this type believe if you want something done right, you’d better do it by
yourself.. And so they’re mostly often drawn to lone-wolf career positions that allow them
to make the most of their creativity without having to explain themselves along the way.
And that includes having to explain themselves to a partner who may want a different direction in
life. Rooted in their passion and determination, some INTJs are on a one-way-track to success,
leaving romance to be perceived as nothing but another possible distraction.
Number 8: They don’t know how to be a partner
When it comes to success, INTJs feel most confident in their performance
when they’ve had the time to properly research the topic. However, when it comes to romance, there is
only so much research you can do before you have to just go out and experience it for yourself.
Like most life-lessons, you need to do the nitty gritty work in order for people to learn a lesson.
Sure, this observing type may be able to get an idea through analyzing others and watching
movies.. But still, they’re left feeling romantically clueless. Whether they’ve
had a failed attempt or 2 at love, or they’re just stepping out into the world or romance,
the ambitious INTJ can become quite hesitant if they don’t feel confident with what they
bring to the table. And ultimately, INTJs know romance isn’t necessarily their strong suit.
Number 9: The idea of romance isn’t all that enticing
Unlike their INFJ-feeler counterpart, INTJs don’t see romantic partnerships as anything like the
fairytale books. Some INTJs may just simply conclude that romance isn’t worth the logical
aspects of it like the time and effort needed to make it successful. They know they underestimate
the challenges that come with a partnership, and they’re not exactly willing to find out
for themselves. With so many aspects to life and options you can take, in the eyes of a young INTJ,
romance is nothing but another option you can take. It’s not to say that their conclusion is
permanent, but sometimes INTJs don’t need any other reason for not stepping into the dating
game other than the fact that it doesn’t seem as fine and dandy as other’s portray it to be.
Well, that’s all for today, PSYCH-Os! So, are you a single INTJ? If so,
what’s your reasoning? Let us know in the comments below! Also, make sure to leave us a like,
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