This does not have to be your life.
Today we will teach you how to not fear the squat toilet.
Most case of STSD
Squat Toilet Stress Disorder
are caused by improper squatting technique.
First, you must learn how to squat the Japanese way.
American squat like this.
This squat is unstable,
leaving you prone to falling.
stop it
I'M TRYIN TO GO THE BATHROOM
Japanese squat like this.
To switch to flat foot squat,
you must shift your center of gravity forward.
This position BERY STABLE.
Stop it!
The most common squat toilet mistake
is not squatting far enough.
You may have heard that at least with squat toilet
you can get thigh workout while you pee.
HA HA HA SO FUNNY JOKE
Squat is RESTING POSITION
All the way down.
It is not difficult position
Unless you have
BIG BUTTO
Because maybe it touches the floor.
You should not use squat toilet.
When you use squat toilet,
you must pull pants below knees.
Otherwise your pockets become upside down while you use toilet.
Many squat toilets are auto-flushing.
Beeeeery dangerous situation.
Many people every year tricked into giving sacrifice
to evil squat toilet gods.
Do not let them fool you.
Because IDIOTS LIKE YOU
is peeing incorrectly
many times there is pee ALL OVER ZA FLOOR.
And then some people is pressing flush
with their pee shoes, too.
Use toilet paper to flush.
And hover above ground so that you do not touch the floor.
With these three tips
squat toilets are easy and relaxing to use!
DON'T STOP HOVERING
Many people find they enjoy squat toilets more
once they know how to use them correctly
because they are so quick to use
and you do not have to touch anyshing.
I SAID DON'T STOP HOVERING.
Are you ready?
Mmhmm
Nope, I'm sorry.
I got your boobs. Not your face.
Can you hold it open until-
IT'S REALLY HARD TO BALANCE ON ONE LEG
One more time IN THIS TOILET
yES
All right fine, I'll just hold the door shut again.
[gagging cough]
Yeah, I am. I just choked on my own spit.
Oh. I thought you were being dramatic.
You can hold your own door if you want.
I have to say, I feel a bit weird using the disabled toilet.
Sorry, I'll say at the end it was for comedic effect!
Ow, my knees.
This floor is hard and my knees are so bony