(gentle music) (groans)
- Oh, hi.
Yes, we are just standing in my sort of messy kitchen.
I was gonna call this video something really jazzy,
like "10 Coping Tips When You are Having a Bad Day",
which I think we can all agree
is actually a really snazzy title.
I don't know.
Actually, I might still call it that.
If we will throw some coping tips in there,
weirdly was going to film it,
and then was like, "Oh, no, wait.
Having a bad day.
Not really actually feeling up to giving advice
on anything life.
So funny story, I used to say that I didn't have
any mental health problems at all.
I just had physical health things.
Therefore, there was like just mental stuff
that came along with that.
Hi, if you're new here, I'm Jessica.
I was born with some physical disabilities
that affect my nerves and muscles,
which then affect like loads of other stuff,
and then give me the effects of having
a longterm chronic illness,
kind of is like having a longterm chronic illness.
Basically, I have longterm chronic illness.
Then I started having therapy with BetterHelp,
sponsor of today's video, and realized, "Hmm, no.
The actual truth of the matter is,
there's a lot of lighter manners.
It doesn't really matter what you started with, Jessica,
because you went through some stuff,
and that really sucked.
That left you with some things inside
that are difficult to deal with mentally, wonderful.
Some days I'm much better
at dealing with that than other days.
Some days, it does not cross my mind at all.
Other days, it is just there, really right there,
very much sticking in my mind.
I don't know why we say mind.
Threaten them.
It's everywhere.
It's like a big empty space inside my soul, that's fun.
Side note, one of the things
that probably scarred me the most
was not being acknowledged or not having the fact
things were difficult for me acknowledged
because it was supposed to be something
that I went through a lot,
therefore, how could it continue to be upsetting, right?
If I'm a child who injures myself a lot,
how can I be emotionally distressed about a new injury?
Well, I can.
Or being treated like it was perfectly reasonable
to have delayed medical attention
for a broken bone for an entire day
because, of course, I was often injured,
and I should be used to pain.
So if you're going through a similar thing,
I'd just like to take this moment to say that
I recognize and understand and acknowledge you.
So, as I said, my top tips for coping on a bad day
were originally all very physical, things like
(freezer door clacking)
keep a gel eye mask in the freezer,
absolutely fabulous when you've got a migraine.
Physically not up to bathing,
but still need to feel fresh?
100% biodegradable baby wipes, works like a charm.
Have your partner friend, carer, human of choice,
fill up a two liter bottle
or the largest bottle that you can handle
with water, squash, your drink of choice, keep you hydrated,
and you don't have to move very much.
It's exceptionally elegant.
Stay on top of your pills
even if you're not feeling like eating, absolutely 100%.
You gotta force something down
if it means you need to do it to take your pills.
Also, grapes are a really great option.
It tastes so nice.
I love grapes.
(indistinct)
Make sure your Sims laptop is fully charged at all times
or, you know, whatever else hobby you have.
I don't know.
There should probably be The Sims.
The Sims is really good.
Work out your key foods.
For me, regular water for some reason
makes me feel a bit sick like it's heavy.
Sparkling water, doesn't.
Find out what works for you,
and it's totally okay if that is the only thing
that you want to eat that day.
It's fine, absolutely no one judge me.
Tilly says no judging, therefore,
no judging.
And then I realized, "Hang on,
there are lots of different ways
to have a bad day, and a bad day for me
doesn't necessarily have to be physical.
Sometimes, I have just emotionally bad days,"
which is new or not new.
Maybe it's not new, even just aware of it now.
Thanks, therapy.
Gosh, it tokens your right out,
and then you're like, "Ooh, I dunno if that was good.
Maybe I should lock that box back up.
No, I shouldn't now.
Therapy is good, yeah.
Hard, good, but it means that I have other tips like
write a journal entry yourself or maybe for a friend
or partner or even your BetterHelp therapist.
Today's video is sponsored by BetterHelp.
You should be aware of BetterHelp by now,
but if you aren't,
they are the world's largest online therapy platform,
making professional therapy accessible,
affordable, and convenient.
BetterHelp will assess your needs
and match with your own licensed professional therapist.
So rather than having to find a therapist
who works for you just because they're geographically close,
but maybe they're not the right fit for you
in terms of actual therapy, BetterHelp allows you access
to a wider range of therapists,
meaning that you could find a person
who really gels with you.
They have a network of over 20,000 licensed therapists,
and cater to a range of languages,
including American sign language.
With BetterHelp, you can start
communicating with a therapist in as little as 48 hours,
and that communication can also take a variety of forms.
If you're having a bad day,
then maybe these tips are helping.
If you are having more bad days than you think
you can cope with at the moment or just feel like
you need someone to talk to,
then maybe consider seeking professional help.
It's definitely helped me.
BetterHelp's main priority
is to make sure you feel as comfortable as possible,
which means that if you don't like your therapist,
it's super easy to change them,
and you don't have to tell them.
BetterHelp tells them,
and you get to schedule in a weekly video or phone session
that works for you rather than it being like
the same time each week, and then you've gotta like
schedule everything around it
or you could do the same time each week.
It really depends on you, really.
What kind of a planner are you?
If you're interested in trying BetterHelp for yourself,
I have a special off for my followers.
You can get 10% off your first month
when you sign up using the link in the description.
betterhelp.com/jessica.
That's betterhelp, help as in H-E-L-P.com/jessica.
And obviously, this is a very boring, very obvious,
isn't it even a tip if you've had it this many times before,
but being out in nature, it helps.
Actually doing things in the garden
is probably more helpful.
Winding sweet peas...
I guess because I'm doing something
and you have to put like a minimal thought into it?
But it also allows my mind to just be, just exist.
We have blue bells in our garden, unrelated.
(upbeat music continues)
Sunny days, they help.
(upbeat music continues)
There's one thing I've learned
from going on a weirdly impromptu mental health journey.
It's the hat.
A lot of the things that I already knew
from dealing with physical health issues,
all those little tips and tricks,
they all apply just the same.
A bad day is a bad day, no matter what kind of a day it is.
And, of course, some of the tips
are both mental and physical and emotional, right?
Like give in.
Absolutely just give in.
Listen to yourself.
Recognize that this is going to be a bad day.
That you don't need to fight against that,
just allow the day to be what it is.
Fighting against it isn't necessarily
going to make it be anything else.
So let's just work with what we've got
or thinking about your day in one hour chunks,
whether it's a physical thing that we're dealing with today,
mental thing, or, again, emotional drama.
The great thing is we're just taking it one step at a time,
it's ever so slightly easier, right?
Don't overly push yourself to be amazing at work today.
It's okay to just be okay sometimes.
Probably the reason that being out in nature helps so much
is that it just keeps going and when I'm like,
"My God, how am I still upset?
Why this thing?
How is this upsetting me again?
Like same stuff, different day."
(upbeat music continues)
Nature, it just keeps on going, right?
And the things that we planted last year are bigger now.
They're more beautiful.
They've grown larger
Our little trees are becoming more established.
The bulbs, the puny bulbs that I planted last year
that came up and didn't look like they were doing anything
at all that then got cut back,
and now this year they're come up again,
and they actually are gonna flower.
So excited about those, my gosh.
I know these tips should probably just be a dog.
It a pretty good life to me.
(upbeat music continues)
Thank you so much for watching this video.
I hope you'd managed to take something away from my tips.
Let me know in the comments
if you have more tips of people having a bad day,
whatever form of bad day that is,
whether it's a physical one, an emotional one, a mental one,
you know, or you're just, "It's just a crummy day."
Sometimes we just have really crummy days.
Feel your feelings, friend.
Feel your feelings.
Absolutely no one is the judge of you.
Thank you again to BetterHelp for sponsoring this video,
and for providing therapy that I've found really helpful.
Remember, I have a special offer for my followers.
Get 10% off your first month
when signing up using the link in the description.
If you haven't already, please subscribe
and hit the bell to be notified when I make a new video,
which reminder, I do have some time off coming up.
Yes, I'm gonna be taking a whole month off
from the 20th of May to the 20th of June
so I can spend a whole month
with my beautiful, beautiful baby boy.
Also, write a book.
Probably make it into a video. (laughs)
It's exciting.
It's scary.
That's the world, I guess.
I'll see you in my next video. (lips smacking)