You know that feeling you get on a Sunday evening when you start to realize
the weekend is ending, and you start thinking about everything you have to do
next week? That feeling of dread and overwhelm. Well in this video we're gonna
talk about one antidote to feeling overwhelmed.
Hi everyone Emma McAdam here I'm a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and this
is my baby girl Grace, she's my sweetie. Okay I have two other
sweeties too. So I'm making this video in my backyard while the kids play inside
with my husband. So in this video we're gonna talk about overwhelm. Hey did you
know I've got four courses on udemy.com on mental health topics. These courses go
in-depth on how to help treat depression anxiety PTSD and how to learn coping
skills for stress and other issues. So, check those out right now they're on
sale for $9.99 on udemy.com so check the link in the description and let's
get back to the video. So, when you get overwhelmed do you feel like paralyzed
or do you freeze up or quit or on the other hand do you like run amok like
trying frantically to do everything? Or maybe you get irritable or defensive or
procrastinate and avoid your tasks. When you start to have a bad day do you go
out of your way to bring to mind every single bad thing that has ever happened
to you? Or do you just feel like there's so much to do it's pointless to start.
Like these behaviors they're all functional in the short term they give
us an excuse to shut down and curl up in bed but they aren't gonna help you in
the long run. On the other hand some people have a habit of sprinting around
trying to do everything for everyone until they become completely exhausted
and then they shut down and this might get some things done but it isn't
sustainable in the long run. We often develop these habitual responses to high
levels of stress and our tendency is to shrink back withdraw or protect oneself.
Each one of these responses is a type of fight flight or freeze response and it's
triggered by an overload to the alerting part of the brain.
This is the sympathetic nervous system. So these responses they're natural but
they often get in the way of getting anything done. So take a minute right now
and think about what are your behaviors when you feel overwhelmed and how well
are they working for you? The deep brain so this is the brainstem and the limbic
system. The deep brain is not built to multitask efficiency our cortex so
that's like the front part of your brain it can do that a little bit but juggling
multiple tasks freaks out our core brain, and this triggers an emotional response
this shutdown response. But fortunately this is something we can counteract in a
few simple ways. So the first thing you want to do is check yourself for faulty
thinking that gets in the way of getting stuff done. So thoughts like I should be
able to handle all of this right now. There's this faulty idea that scientific
discoveries were all this single Eureka moment and the reality is most tasks
great and small are accomplished by degrees, this small progress that builds
on other people's work or little bits of progress here and there. Another piece of
faulty thinking that's gonna stop you is all or nothing thinking. Hello! And this says
if I can't do it all right and get it all right then I might as well not even
try. Instead practice big-picture thinking paired with small actions.
Here's another type of faulty thinking that's gonna interfere with your ability
to get things done when you're overwhelmed. This idea that I must always
say yes, that I have to always do what other people want me to do. Instead you
and I we've all got to learn to say no and to prioritize. We want to be able to
maximize our short time in this life we want to be able to do everything and
take care of everyone and we sometimes delude ourselves that it's even possible
to do everything. Then we spread ourselves too thin and we multitask
ourselves into non productivity. I might be multitasking a little bit here
but seems to be working so far. Instead, choose the important over the urgent,
and prioritize your tasks so that you don't feel like you have to do
everything. Here's another type of thinking that's gonna get in the way
when you're overwhelmed. If you say, I'll do it when I don't feel blank about it.
So, I'll put myself out there when I don't feel scared or I'll start writing
my book when I feel motivated. Sometimes we just need to start something before
our confidence and our motivation builds. So, let's talk about one antidote to
being overwhelmed. First, write it all down. Right? Do a brain dump or a mind map
and then break it down, break it down into small concrete steps. Next
prioritize so choose what's most important and say no to the least
important tasks or put them off for a little bit later, and then do one thing
just do one thing. There is immense power in just doing one thing. The hardest
parts of projects are the first 1% and the last 10% but it's usually the first
1% that stops us. If we can just take that first step we start to get
motivated and then we often complete the project. So for example I recently
attended this seminar that discussed the enemies to writing and fear uncertainty
and self-doubt were some of the main enemies to getting writing done, and the
antidote was to simply start writing and work on it a little bit at a time. So I
have a system where I just force myself to write even when I don't feel like it
and I tell myself just work on one section, and after I get started on one
section pretty soon I find myself going and going I mean this is usually like
5:00 in the morning because that's the only time I have a chance to write when
I have all these kids around here. But I get going
and I don't want to stop and then I get a bunch done. So, just get started. I love
this little meme from Veronica Dearly though I may have needed to edit it a
bit because my children might watch my channel someday in the future so
if you're thinking how the bleep am I gonna get through the next week make a list of
what you need to get done put your pajamas on get an early night get ready
to kick some butt and remember, you've gotten through all the weeks up until
now. You guys got this! So, check out my video on catastrophizing if you want to
learn more about recognising thoughts that cause anxiety,
and please share this video because you never know who needs it today. Thanks for
watching and take care.