Hey it's Stephan, how are you doing?
A lot of guys tell me that the biggest problem when talking to women is that they don't know
what to say next or that they just go blank their mind goes blank and they just don't
know what to say next and if that you as was well then you know this will be helpful.
What's the reason why the mind goes blank or why guys don't know what to say next with
the number one reason for that after having talked with and coached many guys over the
years.
The number one reason for them not knowing what to say next and also for their mind going
blank is that they haven't listened to what she said because they've been worrying about
what to say next.
You see if they have listened or if they were able to listen well they would get lots of
information from what the girl has just said specially if the girl actually wants us to
carry on talking and having the conversation developed she will give guys cues.
Cues are bits of information that men can pick up on or can ignore as very often guys
do because they're not really hearing what she's saying because they're nervous or they
are worried about what to say next.
So it's a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you're worried about what to say next you're likely
to not be picking up the cues that the girl leaves therefore, you won't have anything
to relate to anything that to pick up on and therefore, what you will say next will either
be unrelated or you might just dry up and not know what to say.
Because there is enough working in your own vacuum there instead of listening, hearing
what she's saying, and picking up what you find interesting about what she saying or
what she finds interesting about what she's saying and noticing that and asking her another
question about it.
So as an example, if you have a conversation that says Bob says, "Hey have you've been
here before?"
and the girl says, "No, it's my first time, actually I moved here recently."
And then if Bob doesn't know what he's doing then he will say, "Yeah I've been here many
times and it's really a good band that's why I come here."
So it doesn't connect with what she's just given him as cues.
She gave him cues and she said it's her first time and she said she only moved here recently.
Now that is not real information that she has given which indicates that she wants him
to keep talking to her otherwise, she could just have just said, "No."
Alright so there we go, so if Bob is clever he had picked up on stuffed that she said
because he's listening and then equal their conversation.
I would advise you to do the same listen carefully, don't think ahead about what you've got to
say that you just have to trust that she will say something that you will be able to connect
with, comment on, and ask her another question about.
It's really important not to think ahead and plan your next sentence that way lies, blank,
starry-eyes, faces of men and women absolutely go mad when they see this happening and it
happens a lot.
So I hope that is useful so make sure in the moment that you keep listening and only when
you've listened you will let whatever you've heard and informed what you are going to respond
to.
That's how a conversation is actually two-way street.
Alright now, this is a very basic thing that I'm explaining which I'm sure you know but
it's a very important thing.
If you want to find out more about everything to do with conversation skills and everything
to do with how to make sure that woman feel connected and attracted to you when you talk
to them go to http://www.PimpYourLingo.com and that is where I share a lot of cool information
and a lot more advanced than this and of course we'll also go with the basics.