MY NAILS LOOK AMAZING.
AMAZING.
HAPPY WONDERFUL TUESDAY
EVERYONE.
BUT FIRST, JUST SOME SOMBER NEWS
TONIGHT.
A GOOD PAL OF THE SHOW, PAUL
SORVINO PASSED AWAY YESTERDAY.
HE WAS AN AMAZING ACTOR AND ONE
OF OUR FIRST GUESTS ON THIS VERY
SHOW. YOU MIGHT KNOW HIM FROM THE
YOU MIGHT KNOW HIM FROM THE
LEGENDARY MOVIE GOOD FELLAS AND
HERE’S ONE OF MY FAVORITE
SCENES.
>> HEY PAULY.
>> I’M TELLING YOU I COULD TELL
ANYBODY MY SON COULD BE ANYBODY.
YOU DON’T MESS AROUND WITH THAT
GARBAGE OKAY.
>> WHAT GARBAGE PAULY.
>> DON’T MAKE A JERK OUT OF ME.
DON’T DO IT.
>> I WON’T.
>> DON’T DO IT.
>> OKAY.
I WOULDN’T.
>> YOU ONLY UNDERSTAND YOU’RE ON
THE AIR BECAUSE I GOT YOU A JOB
RIGHT.
>> YEAH.
>> YOU SEE ANYBODY MESSING WITH
YOUR SHOW YOU’RE GOING TO TELL
ME RIGHT?
>> I SWEAR PAULY.
I SWEAR.
>> GO DO YOUR SHOW.
>> THANKS PAULY.
>> GET IN THERE.
HE AIN’T A BAD KID.
NEEDS ANOTHER COUPLE SMACKS,
THOUGH.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: I WILL, I WILL NEVER
WASH MY FACE AGAIN.
LUCKILY HE DIDN’T SLAP ME ON THE
ASS.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Greg: ON TO THE NEWS.
IT’S FUN TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS
WHEN SO-CALLED COMPASSIONATE
LIBS GETS A TASTE OF THEIR OWN
NO COST COMPASSION, YOU KNOW,
THE KIND THEY PRESCRIBE FOR
OTHER PEOPLE BECAUSE THEY DON’T
HAVE TO PAY THE PRICE BUT YOU
DO.
TAKE IMMIGRATION WHERE
EVERYTHING IS FREE FOR ANYONE
WHO COMES IN BECAUSE IT’S IN
YOUR STATE BUT NOT THEIRS.
SORRY TEXAS YOU’RE SCREWED IT’S
YOUR FAULT FOR BORDERING MEXICO
AND INVENTING DR. PEPPER.
IT’S TRUE.
MIGHT BE HOW MY PARENTS FELT
WHEN THEY WENT AWAY FOR THE
WEEKEND AND I HAD HALF THE CHESS
CLUB OVER TO DRINK THEIR BOOZE.
THERE WERE ONLY TWO PEOPLE IN
THE CLUB.
IT WAS JUST ME.
NOW YOU GET THE IDEA, I DRINK
ALONE.
SORRY.
BUT FOREVER, BORDER STATES
COMPLAINED ABOUT THE BURDENS
PLACED ON THEIR SERVICE WAS THE
INFLUX OF ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS.
THEY AREN’T COMPLAINING ABOUT
THE PEOPLE, BUT THE POLICIES.
THEY KNOW WITHOUT AN ACTUAL
PROCESS EVERYTHING FALLS APART.
IT’S LIKE WHEN EDWARD
SCISSORHANDS ENTERED THAT BOUNCY
CASTLE.
AS WE KNOW, REPUBLICANS ARE FANS
OF LAW JUST LIKE STRICT PARENTS
BUT DEMOCRATS ARE FANS OF STUFF
MINUS THE MEANS TO GET THEM LIKE
STRICT PARENTS’ CHILDREN.
SO WHEN BORDER STATES COMPLAIN,
THE LEFT CALLS ITSTEIN PHOBIC.
OH, YOU JUST DON’T LIKE THE
BROWN FOLKS.
AND THEY’LL EVEN SAY IT TO BROWN
FOLKS.
THE DEFINITION OF RACISM IS
ANYONE HOP DISAGREES WITH A
DEMOCRAT.
AND WHEN THE BORDER PATROL TRIES
TO DO THEIR JOB YOU GET WHIP
GATE WHICH PRESIDENT BIDEN
EMBRACED.
HOW DO YOU GET DEMS TO
UNDERSTAND THE PROCESS?
YOU GET THEM TO EXPERIENCE THE
PROCESS.
WHAT’S GOOD FOR THE GOOSE IS
GOOD FOR THE SLANDERER.
LET’S SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE
DEMOCRAT FAR AWAY FROM THE
BORDER STATE GETS TO PLAY BORDER
STATE FOR A YEAR.
THAT’S WAY OF SAYING LET’S SEE
HOW YOU A HOLES LIKE IT.
HMM I WONDER IF OUR SYSTEM WAS
INUNDATED.
>> OUR SYSTEM WAS INUNDATED
WITH, YOU KNOW, THOSE WHO WERE
SEEKING SHELTER BECAUSE OF THE
CALLOUSNESS OF THOSE OTHER
STATES THAT PUSHED THEM OUT.
OUR SCHOOLS ARE GOING TO BE
IMPACTED.
OUR HEALTHCARE SYSTEM IS GOING
TO BE IMPACTED.
OUR INFRASTRUCTURE’S GOING TO BE
IMPACTED.
>> Greg: SOUNDS LIKE MY DENTIST.
EVERYTHING’S GOING TO BE
IMPACTED.
WHICH IS WHAT SHOULD HAPPEN WHEN
YOU CALL YOURSELF A SANCTUARY
STATE.
SEE, THE VIRTUE SIGNAL JUST
BECAME REAL.
THE COST OF LAWLESSNESS SORT OF
HOW A DRUG KING PIN GETS KILLED
BY ANOTHER DRUG KING PIN THOSE
ARE THE RULES.
SO I’M FOR MIGRANTS COMING TO
NEW YORK CITY, AND IT’S NOTHING
TO DO WITH HAVING TO REPLACE MY
MA SUESES.
ALL RIGHT, P, MARCO, KLEM AND
STEW, YOU’RE NEVER GOING TO FIND
THEM.
I WANT THEM TO UNDERSTAND THEIR
OBSESSION WITH CHEAP LABOR BUT I
LIKE IMMIGRANTS ESPECIALLY
COMPARED TO WHAT’S HOME GROWN
HERE.
HAVE YOU EVER MET A WOKE
MIGRANT.
I HAVEN’T.
THEY THINK LATINX ARE THE MOVIES
I MADED IN TIJUANA IN THE 90s,
AND THEY’RE RIGHT. IT’S HOW I MET RICKY MARTIN.
IT’S HOW I MET RICKY MARTIN.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: TRUE THERE ARE BURDENS
TO THE SYSTEM WHEN LOTS OF
ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS SHOW UP.
THEY PUT MORE STRESS ON THE
INFRASTRUCTURE THAN JOY BEHAR ON
A TOILET SEAT.
[LAUGHTER]
>> Greg: BUT THEY AREN’T EVEN
CLOSE TO WHAT SOME AMERICANS
HAVE DONE TO THIS COUNTRY.
ILLEGALS DIDN’T UPEND THE
CRIMINAL JUSTICE SYSTEM.
THEY DIDN’T CREATE CRITICAL RACE
THEORY.
IF THEY DID THEY’D BE RICH.
THEY DIDN’T DESTROY SPORTS.
UNLIKE MEGAN RAPINOE YOU COULD
ARGUE THEY MAKE SPORTS BETTER.
AS FOR THE TWO YEARS OF RIOTING
I DO NOT REMEMBER SEEING ANYBODY
RUNNING BACK INTO A BURNING
BUILDING BECAUSE THEY DROPPED A
BREAKFAST TACO.
>> A RACIST WOULD SAY.
>> Greg: THAT WAS A SHOUT-OUT TO
DR. JILL.
ANYWAY, THERE ARE HORRIBLE
EXCEPTIONS.
THEIR DRUG DEALERS AND GANG
MEMBERS AND SOCCER FANS.
AND WE COULD DEBATE CRIME
STATISTICS ALL YOU WANT BUT IT’S
HARD WHEN WE DON’T CALL IT CRIME
ANYMORE.
WHICH IS WHAT THE WOKE DID NOT
MEXICANS.
AND ILLEGALS HAVE INCENTIVES TO
KEEP THEIR NOSE CLEAN BUT BE
HONEST YOU WOULD TRADE 100 WOKE
SISTERS FOR ONE HARD WORKING
DUDE NAMED JULIO KEEPS TO
HIMSELF HAS STRONG FAITH AND
ISN’T AFRAID OF A HARD DAY’S
WORK.
I’LL TAKE THE TRADE.
I’LL LOSE A HUNDRED LIBERAL ARTS
GRADS FOR ONE GREAT SHORTSTOP.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: NOW I’M NOT SUGAR
COATING ILLEGAL IMMIGRATION THAT
WOULD BE STUPID TO DO NOT TO
MENTION FATTENING AND BAD FOR
YOUR TEETH.
I’M SAYING WHAT’S HAPPENING TO
MAYOR ADAMS RIGHT NOW IS NEEDED
SPREAD OUT THE RESOURCE BURDEN
AND SEE HOW THESE CAPTAINS OF
COMPASSION HANDLE IT.
BECAUSE IN A REAL CRISIS WORDS
ALONE ARE NOT ENOUGH.
YOU HAVE TO ACTUALLY DO
SOMETHING.
♪
>> HEY, BUDDY, WATCH OUT.
>> OH, HEY, KAT.
>> JOE, IS THAT A FAX MACHINE?
THAT IS SO AWFUL.
PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF THERE’S
ANYTHING I CAN DO.
>> YEAH, YOU COULD HELP ME GET
THIS FAX MACHINE OFF MY CHEST.
>> OF COURSE.
I’M SURE IF YOU NEED TO GET
ANYTHING OFF YOUR CHEST.
MY HEART GOES OUT TO YOU.
>> YEAH, WELL, MY HEART’S
GETTING CRUSHED BY THIS FAX
MACHINE.
>> I’M STARTING A HASHTAG ON
TWITTER RIGHT NOW, OKAY?
JUSTICE FOR JOE, WE’RE STARTING
A MOVEMENT.
>> WOW.
AND IRONICALLY I’M UNABLE TO
MOVE BECAUSE OF THIS FAX
MACHINE.
>> I HEAR YOU.
YOU’RE IN MY THOUGHTS.
>> HERE’S A THOUGHT.
CAN YOU PUSH THIS FAX MACHINE
OFF OF ME?
>> I’VE GOT TO GO.
I’M GOING TO BE LATE FOR THE
RALLY.
WE ALREADY HAVE SUPPLIERS.
DON’T WORRY, I GOT YOU.
>> HELLO XEROX?
YES, I CAN HOLD.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: SO THIS WORKS WITH
IMMIGRATION, HOW ABOUT
POLITICIANS WHO JUST DISMISS
CRIME.
THEY HAVE PRIVATE SECURITY,
GATED HOMES.
THEY NEVER SEE WHAT YOU SEE.
THEY’RE SAFE AND SOUND WHILE YOU
SUFFER.
AND THE WORSE THINGS GET THE
MORE THEIR GATED HOMES ARE WORTH
AND THE CHEAPER THE LANDSCAPING
LABOR.
HOW DO YOU MAKE THEM SEE THAT
BESIDES PLACING ADS IN MODERN
WINE SNOB MAGAZINE?
THAT’S NOT REAL.
THUGS CAN MAKE CRIMES AND ARE
QUICKLY RELEASED AND OUR
GOVERNORS DON’T DO SQUAT.
NEXT TIME DRIVE THE PERPS TO THE
STREETS WHERE THE GOVERNORS LIVE
AND DROP THEM OFF LIKE DONG
DUNNING ON PELOSI’S FRONT STEP
AND WATCH HER PANIC LIKE SHE
JOINED FOUND OUT HER PLASTIC
SURGEON WAS RUN OVER BY HER
MEXICAN MAID.
LASTLY IT’S TOUGH SEEING
POLITICIANS IGNORE VIOLENT CRIME
WHILE FOCUSING ON A SHOW TRIAL
BECAUSE IT HASN’T TOUCHED THEIR
LIVES.
THEY HAVE TAXPAYER FUNDED
SECURITY.
TO MANY JANUARY 6TH SEEMS MORE
PEACEFUL THAN GETTING HOME AFTER
DARK.
THINK ABOUT THOSE WHO GOT AWAY
WITH CRIME WHILE JANUARY 6TH
PROTESTERS ARE IN JAIL.
MAYBE THIS TIME WE SHOULD HAVE
BEEN GETTING VIOLENT STREET
FELONS TO WALK THROUGH A DOOR AT
AN OPEN CAPITOL.
THEN THEY WOULD HAVE CARED.
>> PERIOD.
>> Greg: LET’S WELCOME
TONIGHT’S GUESTS!
SHE’S BRIGHT AND SHARP, LIKE A
GLOW IN THE DARK DART.
STRATEGY BP AND FORMER PRESS
COMMUNICATIONS FOR PRESIDENT
TRUMP’S CAMPAIGN, ERIN PERRINE!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: HIS PET PEEVES ARE
COMMUNISTS AND RUST, RETIRED
MARINE CORPS JOHNNY JOEY JONES.
THAT WAS NICE.
THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HIM AND A
DEER IN THE HEADLIGHTS IS THAT
PEOPLE ACTUALLY HAVE HEARD OF
DEER.
ACTOR, COMEDIAN AND WRITER JAMIE
LISSOW!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: AND SHE’S SO THIN HER
PAJAMAS ONLY HAVE ONE STRIPE.
FOX NEWS CONTRIBUTOR KAT TIMPF!
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
>> Greg: JAMIE OBVIOUSLY WE
TALKED ABOUT THE FACT THAT YOU
LIVE IN ALASKA, ONE OF THE GREAT
THINGS THERE IS NOBODY IMGRATES,
RIGHT?
>> THAT’S TRUE.
>> Greg: EXCEPT FOR SEALS AND
BEARS.
>> THAT’S TRUE, SEALS AND POLAR
BEARS.
IT’S BEEN A GOOD PLACE HONESTLY
TO RIDE ALL THIS STUFF OUT.
WATCHING THE VIDEOS IS STARTING
TO UPSET ME ALL THE VIOLENT
VIDEOS.
I ALWAYS FEEL BAD THEY’RE ALWAYS
BEATING UP THAT SAME GUY WITH
THE BLURRY FACE.
>> Greg: THAT IS TRUE.
>> Jamie: THERE’S GOT TO BE A
BETTER WAY TO HANDLE THE BORDER
THING, THERE HAS TO BE.
BIDEN AND GIVING OUT IDs.
I DID JUST HEAR IT’S ACTUALLY
FASTER TO FLY TO TIJUANA CROSS
THE BORDER AND GET AN ID.
THE LINE IS SHORTER THAN AT THE
DMV.
>> Greg: IT’S TRUE.
>> Jamie: I LOVE MEXICANS TOO
BIG FAN.
MY WRITING PARTNER’S FROM MEXICO
CITY, MY BROTHER-IN-LAW IS
MEXICAN.
THEY TOLD ME SOMETHING
INTERESTING THEY SAID YOU CAN
TELL WHAT MOOD SOMEONE FROM
MEXICAN’S IN BY THE WAY THEY’RE
HOLDING THEIR GUN IF THEY HAVE A
GUN.
SIDEWAYS, RUN.
UP IN THE AIR, TIME TO PARTY.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE].
>> I LIKE IT.
>> Greg: I WAS WORRIED ABOUT
WHERE THAT WAS GOING.
>> Erin: SO WAS I.
>> Greg: ALL RIGHT JOEY DO YOU
THINK THIS WAS A GOOD STRATEGY?
I’M STILL UNCLEAR WHETHER TEXAS
OR FLORIDA SENT ANYBODY TO NEW
YORK.
I THINK THEY CAME ON THEIR OWN
BUT I DON’T KNOW.
THIS IS WONDERFULLY IRONIC I
GUESS.
>> Johnny: I GUESS I DON’T
UNDERSTAND BECAUSE BEFORE GREG
ABBOTT DID IT THE BIDEN
ADMINISTRATION DID IT AND WE
REPORTED.
SO IT’S GOOD WHEN THE FEDERAL
GOVERNMENT DOES IT BUT NOT WHEN
A STATE DOES IT AND ADAMS IS NOT
THE COMMUNICATOR TO GET A
SALIENT POINT ACROSS SO IT COMES
OUT LIKE IT’S GOING TO BE BAD,
IT’S GOING TO INVOLVE US LOSING
SEATS IN OUR SCHOOLS AND ALL
THIS BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
WE’RE GOING TO WANT IT TO BE BAD
BECAUSE THAT’S THE JUST THING TO
DO.
ON GIVING THEM IDs IT’S THE
DUMBEST THING I EVER HEARD.
NOT BECAUSE I’M FOR OR AGAINST
GIVING THEM IDs I COME FROM A
TOWN THAT’S 78% HISPANIC THEY
GET ONE THAT SAYS ILLEGAL
IMMIGRANT AND THROW IT AWAY AND
GO DOWN TO THE RIVER AND GET ONE
TO CIRCUMVENT TAXES AND ANYTHING
PUNITIVE AND THINGS THAT DRY UP
EVERY FEW MONTHS.
I’VE SEEN IT HAPPEN OVER AND
OVER AGAIN, MY FRIENDS PARENTS
THAT WERE HERE ILLEGALLY AND MY
FRIENDS WERE NOT.
YOU CHANGE YOUR ID WHEN THE
SITUATION NEEDS YOU TO YOU
CHANGED YOUR IDENTITY.
YOU MAY GO BACK TO WORK IN THE
EXACT SAME FACILITY A YEAR LATER
UNDER A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT
IDENTITY FOR TAX PURPOSES AND
EVERYTHING ELSE.
THIS IS WHERE EVEN BUSINESS
OWNERS ARE COMPLICIT IN THIS BUT
THERE IS A DECADES OLD INDUSTRY
FOR THIS TYPE OF FRAUD AND THEIR
ID IS NOT GOING TO CHANGE THAT.
>> Greg: THIS IS HOW KILMEADE
HAS MANAGED TO BE AT FOX.
>> THAT’S IT.
>> Greg: HE’S BEEN FIRED
ALMOST, I DON’T KNOW, HALF A
DOZEN TIMES BUT HE GOES DOWN TO
THIS VAN, I GUESS BY THE RIVER.
>> DOWN BY THE RIVER.
>> Greg: AND HE GETS ANOTHER
JOB.
HE’S BEEN ON LIKE SO MANY FOX
AND FRIENDS SHOW, THEY’RE JUST
TERRIBLE BUT IT’S LIKE, YOU
KNOW -- ANYWAY.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
ERIN.
YOU’RE IN DC YOU HAVE THE SAME
ISSUE WITH YOUR MAYOR BOWSER,
STILL A FUNNY NAME IF YOU ASK
ME.
IS SHE DEALING WITH THIS OR NOT?
>> Erin: NO, NO ONE’S DEALING
WITH IT ESPECIALLY NOT DEMOCRATS
BUT ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY’RE
SURPRISED NOW THAT HEY PLAY
STUPID GAMES WIN STUPID PRIZES
YOU WANT TO HAVE AN OPEN BORDER
AND THEY DO THESE LATE NIGHTS TO
JOEY’S POINT THEY ARE MOVING
ILLEGAL INTO TESTIMONY INTERIOR
OF THE UNITED STATES,
PENNSYLVANIA AND OTHER PLACES
AND THEY’RE ALL OF A SUDDEN
SHOCKED THAT THERE ARE ILLEGAL
IMMIGRANTS IN THEIR COMMUNITIES
AND IT’S A STRAIN ON THEIR
SYSTEM.
I DON’T KNOW WHAT THEY EXPECTED
TO HAPPEN BUT ALL OF A SUDDEN
NOW THEY NEED TO FACE THE
REALITY THAT OPEN BORDER
POLICIES WILL LEAD TO MORE
PEOPLE COMING INTO THE COUNTRY.
IT SEEMS COMMON SENSE BUT THEY
DON’T SEEM TO HAVE THAT.
>> Greg: YEAH, AND THEY’RE
TOTALLY AGAINST ANY KIND OF
PROCESS THAT WOULD ACTUALLY
STREAMLINE THIS BECAUSE I, I
MEAN, I BELIEVE IN THE -- I
BELIEVE THAT, YOU KNOW,
AMERICA’S MADE UP OF RISK TAKERS
KAT.
YOU KNOW ABOUT TAKING RISKS
>> Kat: YES.
>> Greg: YES.
I HAPPEN TO LIKE RISK TAKERS,
PEOPLE THAT COME HERE TO DEFY
ALL ODDS LIKE MY PARENTS DID
WHEN THEY MOVED FROM SAN JOSE
CALIFORNIA TO SAINT-TROPEZ
CALIFORNIA.
THEY WENT ON THE 101 IT WAS 30,
40 MINUTES PROBABLY MID TO LIGHT
TRAFFIC BUT THEY DID IT ANYWAY,
U-HAUL
>> Kat: THAT’S LIKE A LAURA
INGLES WILDER SITUATION.
>> Jamie: THEY MOVED FROM A
TRAILER PARK TO A TRAILER PARK.
LITTLE LAND LITTLE MORE ROOM TO
GROW.
THAT WAS MOVING ON UP, YOU KNOW.
>> Greg: WHAT’S YOUR TAKE ON
ALL THIS?
>> Kat: I THINK THAT ANYBODY WHO
WANTS TO COME CONTRIBUTE TO OUR
ECONOMY THAT’S NOT VIOLENT
SHOULD BE ENCOURAGED AND WELCOME
TO DO SO.
AND SO MANY TIMES WE TALK ABOUT
THE PROBLEMS WITH IMMIGRATION,
IT’S NOT REALLY THE PROBLEMS
WITH IMMIGRATION OR WITH
IMMIGRANTS AT ALL IT’S THE
PROBLEM WITH OUR WELFARE STATE.
SO IT’S NOT LIKE THERE IS A
STRAIN ON THE SYSTEM, IT’S THAT
THE SYSTEM IS A STRAIN ON
EVERYONE AND ALL OF US.
AND I THINK WE NEED TO START
LOOKING AT IT THAT WAY.
>> Greg: THAT’S A GREAT POINT
>> Kat: THANKS.
>> Greg: THERE YOU GO.
ALL RIGHT.
YES, YOU CAN APPLAUD, I’LL GIVE
YOU THAT.
ALL RIGHT, THAT’S ENOUGH.
ALL RIGHT.