With all the talk about Bennifer’s love and future nesting, we couldn’t help but lean
into Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner’s story. The actors seemed to be going the distance. The
whirlwind romance, a very private ceremony, three kids and gushing about each other left and right.
So, what happened to the loving couple? Was it his alcoholism? Or maybe they just weren’t right for
each other? And how did his biggest regret lead him to the love of his life? In today’s video,
we’re taking a trip down memory lane to Ben wooing Jen with emails and everything that followed.
In the year 2000, the new millennia, they met on the movie set about WW2 and felt an initial pull.
At that time, Garner was married to actor Scott Foley. If anyone remembers Felicity? No?
No one? Okay. Scandal is more like it, we guess. Two summers later, Affleck and Garner found
themselves working together again. Although both were with other people (Affleck was dating none
other than JLo), Affleck later said this set was where he and Garner fell in love.
“We met on ‘Pearl Harbor,’ which people hate, but we fell in love on ‘Daredevil.’
By the way, she won most of the fights, which was a pretty good predictor of what would happen down
the road — my wife, holding swords and beating the living shit out of me.” Ah, the loving husband.
Affleck got engaged to Lopez a few months later in the fall. And mere months after that,
Ben and Jennifer Garner appeared on Dinner for Five, a television program in which actor
and film director Jon Favreau and a revolving guest list of celebrities eat, drink, and talk.
Although Garner was still married to Foley and Affleck was engaged to Lopez, some viewers noticed
a hint of a spark between the two actors. One writer for Vulture said that at one
moment during the episode, Garner gives Affleck “such a genuine look of gratitude and affection,
it still makes me a bit uncomfortable to see it on television.” Oh whoa!
And what do you know, a few months after the episode aired,
Garner and Foley went their separate ways. Foley said that nobody else was involved.
“Jennifer became a huge star, and she deserved everything she got. There was no
other relationship, there was no infidelity, nothing. People get divorced, you know?”
Shortly after the separation announcement, Garner filed for divorce and made the split official. In
an interview, she later talked about the divorce and said that they simply didn’t have a shot.
“He’s a really good guy, and we just imploded.” Was it a similar situation with Ben, though?
She did say he was great but a complicated person. “When his sun shines on you, you feel
it. But when the sun is shining elsewhere, it’s cold. He can cast quite a shadow.” Ahhh, so sad.
Jennifer used to gush about her love all the time during their long-term relationship.
In 2010 Garner described her husband as “sexy and kind, but he’s also a riot.
We can be very goofy together.” A year later, she said she would do anything for him because
she knows it’s not taken for granted. The same goes for Ben, as the actor was
expressing his love to the family and Jennifer in particular on every occasion. For example,
in his 2013 Oscar-winning speech, he thanked her for the best marriage, saying:
“I want to thank you for working on our marriage for 10 Christmases. It’s good. It is work,
but it’s the best kind of work. And there’s no one I’d rather work with! I adore you.”
No wonder he romanced her with words. When talking about how they met,
Garner told Parade that Affleck is “a very good writer” and wooed her with emails, explaining,
“He’s a very persuasive writer.” That is so on-brand for the actor, considering
how he wrote letters to JLo to win her back. As we all know, he succeeded. Man, this guy is good!
And one of the first public outings Affleck and Garner graced us with was more than just romantic.
It was like straight from a movie. Shortly after the World Series games that cemented their
relationship, Jennifer visited Ben in Vancouver while he was filming the film Man About Town.
The couple went for an intimate stroll together but ended up getting caught in the rain.
Oh, okay, that is romantic and a half. The pair got engaged a few years after
they first met. Hmm, how’s your guys’ math? After months of mostly keeping their relationship
private, Affleck proposed to Garner on her 33rd birthday.
The couple got married in a private four-person ceremony. Victor Garber, Garner’s Alias co-star,
officiated the wedding, and he and his husband were the only guests there.
“It was an incredible honor and one of the most special events of my life,” Victor later said,
speaking of the nuptials. “I will never forget it. It’s embedded in my heart.” How sweet is that?
And how sad is the fact that Ben and Jennifer announced their shock divorce plans
ONE DAY after they celebrated their tenth wedding anniversary? “We go forward with
love and friendship for one another and a commitment to co-parenting our children,
whose privacy we ask to be respected during this difficult time. Thank you for understanding.”
At the time, it was widely reported that Ben had an affair with the family nanny.
Affleck reportedly left a vacation with Garner and took Christine to a charity
poker tournament in Las Vegas, but his rep denied the two were romantically involved.
A month later, the magazine reported that multiple sources confirmed that the actor
had been dating the 28-year-old. Affleck’s rep, however, adamantly denied the reports.
“The story is complete garbage and full of lies,” he said of Us Weekly’s report that
Ben and Christine struck up a relationship after Affleck and Garner were separated but
before they announced their divorce. “It’s shameful. We are considering legal options.”
But Jennifer set the record straight about the timing of their dalliance when she said
that they had been separated for months before she ever heard about the nanny.
“She had nothing to do with our decision to divorce. Bad judgment?
Yes. It’s not great for your kids for a nanny to disappear from their lives.” Jennifer added:
“I have had to have conversations about the meaning of scandal.”
Almost a year later, unnamed sources told People magazine that Affleck and Garner had called off
the divorce, although they weren’t back together. An insider said they wanted to work on things and
were giving it another try. This totally makes sense considering that the parents of three
had been attending couples therapy “for years” in an attempt to salvage their marriage before
they separated. On the outside, they were a picture-perfect family, but on the inside,
they’ve been struggling for a while. “They were going to divorce when Sam
was born, but you know how it is — baby comes and solves the issues for a bit,
but it’s just a Band-Aid. It hasn’t been working for ages,” a source previously told Us.
But what led to it? Was it Ben’s struggle with alcoholism? Later that month,
Affleck made a Facebook post where he discussed his struggles. The actor wrote that he completed
treatment for alcohol addiction, which he’s dealt with in the past and will continue to confront.
Ben said he wants to live life to the fullest and be the best father he can be.
“I want my kids to know there is no shame in getting help when you need it, and to
be a source of strength for anyone out there who needs help but is afraid to take the first step.”
The 45-year-old actor’s battle began at a very young age.
In fact, his childhood experience of watching how his father, Timothy, battled the same disease
may have had a more significant effect on him than he probably realized.
While speaking to Barbara Walters in 2012, he said:
“My father was an alcoholic... I did know that as a child. He drank a lot. My father was a — what
did they call him — a real alcoholic. He, you know, drank all day, drank every day.”
Even though his father eventually got sober, the whole ordeal left an impression on young Ben.
In an interview with Dailymail, he said that having his best friend,
Matt Damon, and his brother’s support helped him get through the rough times. Of course,
being a father also had a positive influence on the actor. No matter how bad things were,
Affleck had always had no problems asking for help. One of his friends reportedly told People:
“This is a lifelong battle, not one that he takes lightly. His focus is on
his family and getting better so that he can continue with what he loves.”
According to a family source, Garner was always there for him even though they are no
longer together. She simply wanted him to get better for the sake of their three children.
Despite all the controversies surrounding the actor and his setbacks,
we have to give him props for always asking for help when he needed it.
It reminds people that having love and support around you can get you through almost anything.
In 2018, the actor took it to Instagram to express gratitude toward those who have
been there for him throughout his journey. “The support I have received from my family,
colleagues, and fans means more to me than I can say,” he wrote. He concluded the post by writing,
“I hope down the road I can offer an example to others who are struggling.”
Three years after the separation, the pair finalized their divorce. In an interview
with the New York Times, the actor spoke about how his addiction impacted his relationship.
When cracks in his marriage to Garner began to appear, he increased his alcohol consumption.
“The biggest regret of my life is this divorce,” Affleck told the publication. “Shame is really
toxic. It’s just stewing in a toxic, hideous feeling of low self-worth and self-loathing.”
“I have certainly done things that I regret,” he added. “But you’ve got to pick yourself up,
learn from it, learn some more, try to move forward.”
And he did. The biggest regret of his life seemed to have brought him back together with JLo.
The relationship keeps blooming as the couple is looking for a place
and hanging out with both of their kids. Ben and Jennifer tried to work things out,
go to therapy, work on their issues, and support each other through rough times.
But maybe they just weren’t right for each other? The struggles certainly didn’t make it easy on the
famous couple. And no matter how hard you try to make it work, sometimes it just doesn’t. It seems
like Garner and Affleck realized that and decided to move on, co-parenting kids and supporting
each other’s choices in a romance department. Garner “can tell he is happy,” the source says,
adding that Affleck and Lopez’s families are “getting along great.”
What do you guys think of the former couple? Drop your opinions in the comments below. As always,
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