I am in wonderland right now.
This is like an amusement park for my tongue and my stomach
and I am happy like I haven't been in years.
I believe in living again
[S] I believe in the goodness of humanity [M] I believe I can fly
[S] I believe I can fly!
[M] I believe I can touch the sky
[S] I need more. I must have more.
[M] Meemers presents: The Bloopers
[S] Okay
Martina's giving me sass right now. You know what, I just got off the plane and I'm starving
and I'm going to have some General Tso's chicken.
This is where it comes from.
I'm gonna have the original right here.
Can you see how gorgeous this is?
Oh my gosh
Americans, you have never had anything like this before.
Well, you've had something like this before, but not really like like *this* before.
[Simon moans] [M] Simon being the original hipster.
[S] Oh my gosh
*gasp* I could totally one-up everybody now at a Chinese restaurant.
Okay, are you ready? I am so pumped for this. I am so pumped for this.
Oh it has like, a, you can smell the spiciness and the sweetness right there.
Look at how sticky that is. Do you see that?
[Simon moans]
[moans]
It's a little...
subtle hints of orange glaze
beneath a bed of peppers
and the toughness of the chicken skin fried
battered so gently.
Talk like William Shatner.
Meemers presents: The Bloopers
[S] I'm so good at cutting with chopsticks. I never realized I was so talented at this [M] Ooh...
[M] Simon finds his new calling in life.
[M] Quits vlogging and becomes a professional radish cutter
[S] The bubble tea is right behind us.
We are ordering more bubble tea.
[S] Why, hello doggie!
Oh!
Hello little doggie.
Aw no! I'm sorry! I'm friendly!
Don't run away from meee!
Uh...
Shen Jian Bao.
Not quite...
Shen Jian Bao?
Shen *Jian* Bao.
Shen...
Jian Bao
[S] Do it.
[M] Okay.
[M] Can I see the other one here?
This one...
[S] Ducky, wait!
[S] Fried chicken steak.
[M] That doesn't sound very Taiwanese [S] This sh*t is bigger than my ass cheek. It is so huge!
It's like a thigh muscle.
[S] Go!
[M] Okay, ready?
xinhua xia zhan
Close, right?
[S] Yea
[M] Okay, I'm not saying it again.
[off screen] Hua Shen Juan (peanut roll)
[S] Hua Shen Juan
[off screen] Bing Qing Ling (ice cream)
[S] Holy sh*t! There's more?
[S] We are in the Grand View Resort ba- *cough cough*
[S] Water fight!
[M] No
[S] okay
[S] "Taiwan Beer".
Didn't really think of a better name for it than "Taiwan Beer".
What's the name of the beer in Taiwan?
Well, it's called "Taiwan Beer".
What is this a glass for ants? I can cover my whole hand in it.