Oh, hello, PushingUpRoses here. Don’t mind me, I’m just putting on my face. Say…
you heard any good jokes lately? Yeah, me either. Though the last one had me in stitches.
Hey everyone, PushingUpRoses here and today we’re taking a look at Goosebumps: Escape
from Horrorland, the FMV game featuring a handsome Jeff Goldblum as Dracula. Now THAT’s
chaos theory.
Developed and published by DreamWorks interactive, Escape from Horrorland is not meant to directly
follow the Goosebumps book, One Day At HorrorLand, but rather serve as a sequel. Even though
I do enjoy the nostalgia of the Goosebumps franchise, I was not looking forward to this
game. I fully expected it to be trash fire. Live acted games from the 90s are always a
crap shoot and licensed games in general don’t have a great track record, but after playing
this I can honestly say it was pretty damn fun. Zany, campy, straightforward...that wasn’t
bad at all! It’s not exactly a steak dinner but it’s at least a… really well done
whopper from Burger King.
We start up the game and meet Lizzy, who believes her house is being taken over by some kind
of dangerous paranormal activity. Are we...on the ground or something? Why is she hovering
over us? She tells us that her brother Luke and his friend Clay are stuck in the house,
so we follow her to see what the deal is and...it’s lookin’ pretty normal. Lizzy: “What??
Don’t you believe me? I was positive this house was going NUTS.” Oh wow, this acting
is amazing. (mimics Lizzy) Suddenly, the house sucks Lizzy in through the door. House: Mmm,
yes. Come right on in. Not your bike though, pleh!
We both get tossed into a weird, cloud-like portal, then thrown right into Horrorland,
every creepy goth child’s dream come true. The first thing you’ll notice is the fisheye
lens effect when you navigate the screens. It seems like a clever idea in theory but
in execution, it’s not great. It made me feel slightly disoriented at times and just
looks kind of wonky. We hear some yelling, and find Luke and Clay stuck in the stocks,
so our first order of business is to get them out. Not that I want to, mind you. Like most
adolescents, they are terribly annoying.
Similar to how I approach other adventure games, my first instinct was to look around
and get a feel for my surroundings. If you’re not sure where you are, you can check the
directories around each area; they provide a little sequence that features an eccentric
woman who gives you some information about Horrorland. And other random, unhelpful tidbits.
Woman: “Did you know that werewolf spelled backwards is flowerew? WELL NOW YOU DO.”
She comes across as a creepy version of an infomercial host. Woman: “Stick your neck
out at Guillotine Plaza! Hah, yeah right Marie Antionette.” This woman is an icon. Woman:
“Ohhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooo!”
Since you can do a lot of things out of order, the first thing I decided to do was visit
the bat barn. Seemed like a fun spot. On my way I encountered a scarecrow. Sir? Sir? Sir?
SIR? He won’t talk to me until I solve his puzzle; clicking these insufferable pumpkins
until they say “The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight”, the title of one of the Goosebumps books.
This was not fun. But I was looking forward to seeing the Scarecrow come to life because
I thought that was one of the scariest books and episodes from the series. Scarecrow: “I
walk once more to open the door.” What? That’s not scary. That’s not anything!
Scarecrows don’t wear stripey trousers! And the makeup is about on par with the Wizard
of Oz. I kind of just want to cuddle him up and tell him he’s not a failure of a scarecrow
or something. Just keep trying, buddy.
Maybe the bat barn will be scarier. Well, it’s not. But at least I feel at home with
my little bat friends. What’s this? A trash can in the bat barn? Oh no… no no… it
can’t be. They wouldn’t. It’s…. It’s…. A 3D maze.
Right, so these mazes are scattered around Horrorland and thank fucking god, they are
not mandatory. You can go around them if you need coins, which are used for the hint system.
So far the thought of navigating yet another ridiculous, ugly 3D maze in an adventure game
has been the scariest part of this game.
I went back to see what the pumpkins were up to, and after you complete that scarecrow
puzzle, they have nothing better to do than attempting very odd celebrity voice impressions.
Peter Lorre Impression: “The Scarecrow Walks at Midnight!” Christopher Walken Impression:
“The Scarecrow...walks… at midnight. And he WILL kill you. You will die.” John Travolta
Impression: “The Scarecrow walks at midnight Mr. Kotter! I swear! He is absolutely scary,
it’s unbelievable! It’s so funny like Oh my GAHD.
By the time I got back to the stocks to check on the boys, the entire village was ablaze.
Lizzy dramatically flings herself into the fire and I briefly thought “Welp. I must
have lost.” But I managed to turn the water on and everyone was fine. Sort of. I mean,
Lizzy was thrown in a freezer at some point, and Luke was wrapped up and put in a sarcophagus,
and Clay was thrown on a platter like a head of cabbage but other than that they were all
fine. This is fine. Walken: You will die.
As you can see, we’re not exactly following a story, which is not typical for adventure
games. There’s a reason we’re in Horrorland, but after playing a few minutes of the game
I realized it was going to be interaction heavy - there are a lot of things to see and
click on, some more interesting than others. (Pumpkin farts.) And your objective is to
save your parents. Pretty standard stuff for Goosebumps. What did impress me was how well
the live acted sequences were; historically, actors in video games have been… very, very
extra. I can only think of greatly exaggerated scenes from Phantasmagoria, or the exact opposite;
subdued, forgettable performances by actors with no ambition toward acting. Mostly I equate
FMV actors with extreme cheese, even if they have to portray a serious role, but for Goosebumps,
it works perfectly. Chewing the scenery, characters with no chill, really weird camera transitions
and cuts - that’s exactly what I want in my Goosebumps game. Even these weird effects
are pretty interesting; I know it’s fake, I can TELL it’s fake, but it works because
this entire game is campy and surreal as fuck. I’m sure it’d be even more effective to
a kid. Something I find really interesting about Goosebumps in general is that I always
found the books by R.L. Stine were scarier than any visual medium they’ve been adapted
to. The episodic series and games are so much cornier, relying on goofy humor and dream-like
moments; it’s similar to what happens when Stephen King books are adapted. When we read
them, we don’t notice how corny they are, and how unscary some of these paranormal elements
would be if they existed in real life, so instead of trying to make it realistically
frightening, some horror is altered to have a bit of humor, or it just leans into the
cheese completely. It’s not a bad thing, just something I’ve noticed about R.L. Stine’s
content in general.
Even though we’re not exactly following a story, there are still things I need to
do. Such as: Stealing a steak from an innocent group of ants, cutting a mop’s head off
using a guillotine, AND meeting the creator of the park, Madison Storm. You see, he was
kind of lonely so he built a machine that would attract monsters, then he would never
be lonely again. This looks like a prototype for that Mouse Trap board game. I know what
you’re thinking, “Why doesn’t he just hit up a bar or a social club like a normal
person?” Madison: “WHO STOLE ALL MY CHOCOLATES?! Ungh! Ugh! Chocolate! Yes, yes!” yeah, see,
that’s clearly not going to happen for him. These monsters are kinda all he has. Must
be hard having a name with anagrams like “Damn Riot Moss” and “Raid Moms Snot.”
On our adventure we also meet a kind hearted monster named Stump. Stump is a cute name.
Next bird I adopt will be named Stump. Stump: “Shouldn’t be helping. Can’t help it!
Don’t tell.”
He seems very eager to help you, perhaps a little too eager, and gives you some hints
about what you should be doing.
The hardest part about this game is keeping tabs on these kids. They are always wandering
around, getting themselves into trouble. In the beginning of the game I was with Lizzy,
but after I rescued Luke from a mummy, he joins us. Luke: “Hey... “ Check out my
freckles.
Apparently when I wasn’t looking, Lizzy turned herself into Smeagol. Smeagol-Lizzy:
“I am NOT having a very good time here.” Goddamn this is weird. Ooo, books. Maybe there
are clues in her about what I need to do next. Tall Tales. ...Oh. It’s… a book with animals…
that have long tails. (heavy sigh.)
I opened the book of love out of curiosity and it hurt me. Typical.
Now for my most anticipated section of the game, Vampire Village, where we finally get
to see Jeff Goldblum as Count Dracula. Fun fact, did you know the count has a murphy
bed? (Woman shrieking) So I am not sure what I was expecting, but Jeff Goldblum is...just
Jeff Goldblum. Slightly awkward, but even more so here because he’s having a difficult
time talking with the fangs. Dracula: “My beauty… don’t hide your eyes, Lizzy Morris…”This
is a VERY lethargic Count Dracula. Good dancer, though. Despite the count’s lack of energy,
I found this section very charming. There’s a short part where Lizzy dances with him,
and it’s very Disney’s Haunted Mansion, with all of the vampires rising up to join.
It’s too bad about the Goldblum’s lack of energy; even when he’s being zapped with
a magic ring he’s still just saying things like “ohhh nooo...don’t…” After we
escape the mildly loose clutches of the count, we finally find our parents. It’s not lookin’
so great for them, but everyone else seems jazzed about their eventual demise, similar
to One Day at Horrorland where the parents are put on a deadly TV show to entertain the
monsters. There’s even a little go pro creature up there, awwwwww.
I don’t think anyone knew how to wrap up this game regarding how to save the parents
- it seems like there should be a puzzle leading up to their rescue, but there’s just nothin.
Somehow Clay ends up in this tower without ANY explanation. “Don’t ask me how I did
it.” What?? What do you MEAN don’t ask me how I did it? How, why, what? That is a
hefty plot jump. As far as I know, Clay didn’t even know what the monster attractor machine
looked like, and suddenly he finds in this massive tower. Sure Jan. How did you even
get up there??
So he reverses the effect of the machine, and everyone splits. Except for Stump, good
ol kind hearted- whaaaaaaaaa….? Stump was Seth Green the whole time?
Also, does this remind you of a Dead Or Alive video? Dead Or Alive: “You spin me right
round baby, right round…” Without much elaboration, the park self destructs. ...Aren’t
the parents still back there? Hope they made it out alive.
In classic Goosebumps form, the game throws a vague ending at our player; when you escape
from Horrorland and are back safe and sound with your parents, who apparently escaped
at some point, you are greeted by your new neighbor, Maddy. Luke: “Maddy??” Maddy:
Hi kids! Have we MET?” If you DON’T save your parents, you get an even better ending
where they have been transformed into monsters. Oh Goosebumps, you and your slight twist endings.
Beyond the two different endings, I don’t think you can actually die in this game. You
can get hurt a LOT, but all it really did was take away the coins you can use for hints.
Even when I was getting my ass kicked by a bunch of bats, I still didn’t die. Despite
that, I with there were more than 6 save slots. I’m very particular about my save slots.
I actually had a lot of fun with this game; there’s a lot to do, it’s FULL of Goosebumps
books references, and the acting is… yanno, it’s intriguing. I’m not going to say
it’s good, but it’s entertaining. Not everything is particularly scary, but it had
a creepy atmosphere. I also really like these settings, even if the fisheye lens thing is
a little bizarre. The entirety of Horrorland was very easy to navigate, and some of the
sections looked how I envisioned them in their books. I was pleasantly surprised by how manageable
the puzzles were - they’re a combo of inventory object and logical, and they are very fair,
sometimes enjoyable. This... is a good licensed FMV game. Holy shit. I didn’t think that
was even possible; I figured the best thing about this game would be smokin’ hot vampire
Jeff Goldblum but he was one of the weaker parts. Don’t get me wrong, I’d smash that,
but he didn’t add much to the excitement. Interestingly, this game has an amazing cast;
on top of Jeff Goldblum, we also have Isabella Rosalini, Eric Lloyd, and Adam Wylie. It’s
not very long if you know what you’re doing, but if you take the time to look around, appreciate
the...yanno, whatever all this useless crap is, then I think you’re going to like it.
Goosebumps: Escape From Horrorland: It’s okay! Yeah! It’s okay. Like a Whopper.
Wow, wasn’t that exciting? I just love a happy ending. Say, you’re looking like you
could use some work. If you come closer, I can patch you all up. No? Well… suture self.
Happy Halloween, my darklings.
Hey everyone, thanks for watching my video on Escape from Horrorland; I’d love to show
you more videos but FIRST - patreon! Yeah, you know, the thing I talk about after every
video! If you like my work and want to support my show, please consider throwing a few bucks
at me. Don’t literally throw it but… actually, I don’t mind. Throw it at me.
If you are interested in more Goosebumps content, I linked a few on the screen. On the left
we have a video about plant dad, and on the right we have an episode about magic prunes.
If you liked this video, consider sharing it with whoever, and if you just can’t get
enough of me, my social media info is in the description. As always, see you in the next
one!