Ian: Man, I feel really good right now.
This mustache…
Kwaku: I’m really excited for this show.
The greatest thing about this show is that-- *dlfjklsajfdkljfkladjf*
Shelley: This is terrible!
This feels like death!
Ian: You look like Hagrid.
Shelley: I am Hagrid!
I feel like Hagrid!
Kwaku: This is 3 Mormons and the Half Blood Prince.
I don’t know if that made sense but, you know.
Shelley: It did.
Kwaku: Shelley, how do you feel about beards?
Shelley: I hate this.
I hate them, I hate this.
It’s getting in my mouth.
How do you stop that from happening?
Is this a real problem that other people have?
I feel like if I were to eat, it would get stuck and then I could like save it for later,
but that’s disgusting!
Ian: No one-- Shelley: Beards are gross!
Ian: No, no, no, beards are totally fine.
Shelley: Beards are gross.
Ian: The fact that we have to say that beards are gross is just a stupid, silly thing.
Kwaku: I think that they’re nice but they’re reserved for ancient people, like _______.
Appropriate, appropriate for him to have a beard, okay?
He probably-- Ian: Why was it appropriate?
Why was it appropriate?
Shelley: Because he was old-- Kwaku: They couldn’t shave.
They couldn’t shave back then.
Shelley: They would’ve had to use a sharp rock--
Ian: They could shave back then!
Kwaku: No, no, no, if Moses had a Schick Hydro Clean, you know what, I think a lot more people
would’ve followed him.
Shelley: I agree.
I don’t know what that meant, actually.
Kwaku: Why is that offensive?
Ian: Are you saying that clean-shaven men have the-- have more-- have the upper hand
in persuading men to come unto Christ if they are clean shaven?
Shelley: Yes Kwaku: No
Shelley: If I knocked on your door right now, like this, and said,
“Hi I have a message about Jesus Christ, would you like to hear it?”
Ian: Well first off, you’re a woman, you’re a woman.
And that beard is fake.
Shelley: But it’s not fake!
It’s real, I grew this for the show!
Kwaku: At Brigham Young University, the Honor Code says you cannot have a beard.
Shelley: Yeah, it does.
Ian: That’s true.
Shelley: I’ll take it off now.
Mine was easier.
Oh, so you put yours back on, cause you can have a mustache at BYU.
Ian: That’s true, you can have a mustache at BYU.
Shelley: So lots of people like hate on that rule because they’re like,
“No, I should be able to have a beard.
Like, I go to BYU and I want to have a beard!”
If you wanna go to BYU, then you sign the Honor Code, then you should follow the
Honor Code and if you don’t want to follow the Honor Code, don’t sign it, go to a different
school, grow your beard, do whatever you want.
Ian: Okay, I with you Shelley that you should not
argue against the Honor Code that you’re signing.
That’s just very silly and kind of immature.
BUT, if you think you want to change the Honor Code, why not do it?
Shelley: Do it in the appropriate way.
Ian: What is that?
How do you change the Honor Code in an appropriate way?
Shelley: I don’t know how to change the Honor Code.
I’m gonna be real with you.
Ian: Well, Dallin H Oaks, the President of Brigham Young University in 1971--
I’m not going to be able to say this verbatim,
but he did say that the reason we have an
Honor Code and that you have to shave your face in order to go to school there is because,
it was just against culture and it was counter-culture.
However, he was like, “I would be surprised if it’s not subject to change in the future.”
The President of BYU said that.
So if it’s subject to change and now kinda beards are more acceptable, why not?
Kwaku: Beards come into style and they go out of style.
Ian: Yeah Kwaku: That’s how they always have.
So you know what, maybe it will become acceptable-- Ian: I think it is acceptable.
Why is it not acceptable right now?
Kwaku: It is acceptable right now.
Shelley: Because the prophet said no.
Ian: Oh my gosh!
Shelley: He did!
He’s in charge of BYU!
So he’s in charge of the Honor Code!
When he wants to change it, it’ll get changed!
Ian: It is the administration of the university that decides the Honor Code and who does not
decide the Honor Code and then they submit it to the First Presidency so that they can
make the decision so that they can sign off so they can say yes or no.
Shelley: So then the prophet signed off on it!
Ian: Here’s the thing though-- Shelley: He’s cool with it!
Ian: What if the university said, “Alright, let’s allow beards.”
And then the prophet signed off on it.
Shelley: Then the prophet is cool with it!
Ian: Sweet.
Shelley: He’s cool with it.
If you signed it, follow it, if it doesn’t say no beards--
Ian: Not everyone goes to BYU, right?
So if you’re not going to BYU, you’re probably thinking,
“Why are they talking about why you can or cannot have a beard?”
Kwaku: Yes.
Ian: Okay.
Honestly, I don’t think it’s a controversial issue.
The fact that we have to say yea or nay is kind of silly and I think, don’t--
just worry about yourself and don’t worry about other people’s follicles.
Shelley: You should worry about other people’s follicles
when you’re kissing that other person.
If your girlfriend says you should shave-- Ian: What if she’s cool with it?
Shelley: You should shave.
Kwaku: My girlfriend, I love my girlfriend’s beard.
And it feels great.
Ian: Your girlfriend’s beard is quite nice.
So let’s do this new little segment on our show called Rate That Beard!
Kwaku and Ian: Whoooooo!!!
Yeahhhhh!!!
Beards!!!
Ian: Okay, so on Rate That Beard, we’re gonna start with Ryan Gosling.
Okay, let’s look at this one.
Shelley: I will admit, that is an appropriately attractive beard but, how about this one?
Ian: That’s like the Notebook version of Ryan Gosling.
Everyone’s got ups and downs, different seasons and stages.
Shelley: That is a beard that is not fulfilling any purpose other than being unattractive
and gross and weird.
Kwaku: This looks like when your sixth grade math teacher doesn’t take a shower before
he comes in and even all the little kids know that there is something wrong
Ian: What?
Shelley: Okay, beards are weird, this picture proves it.
Ian: Okay, fine beards.
Let’s move on to a cleaner shaven face, with an upper lip caterpillar.
This one looks good.
Shelley: You can’t put a something in sepia tone and just say that’s it’s good because
it’s in sepia tone.
That’s the only reason this picture is acceptable.
Ian: No, no, no, not just because it's in sepia tone.
First off, it’s Robert Redford.
Two, it’s the best western in the world, which is Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid
Kwaku: Not the best Western!
Shelley: He is blonde with a brown mustache, that is like the equivalent of a blond girl
having black eye brows.
Ian: But just look at the mustache. Is it nice?
Rate That Beard, I give it an 8 out of 10.
Shelley: i give it a 2.
Kwaku: It’s not even a mustache!
It’s a beard.
Ian: It doesn’t matter, but is it good?
Kwaku: Okay, for the most part mustaches do look creepy but he makes it look good.
Shelley: Creepy mustaches, what?!
Kwaku: Okay, honestly Jack black pulls it off.
Ian: He is a goof ball!
Shelley: You think that's funny?
Ian: He wants to be funny, look at his face.
Kwaku: He looks for what he is doing.
If he came up to you, people would say,
“Hey, it's Jack Black! It's funny!"
You're not going to be like, “Oh, go shave.”
Shelley: I would!
I would tell him to shave and help him with women.
Kwaku: I don't think that he needs help, he is a millionaire.
Ian: Jack Black, since he is trying to be silly, style points, I give him a 7.
Kwaku: I give him a 9 Shelley: I give it a 1.
Ian: Shelley just hates hair!
Shelley: I hate hair
Ian: But then there is this one, Shelley.
Kwaku: Mhmm, you see.
This is the guy that can’t go within 10 feet of a school.
I don’t think..
Ian: This is Tom Selleck!
This is Tom Selleck…
This is Magnum P-I.
This is the epitome of a perfect mustache.
Kwaku: It’s old news.
Shelley: It’s old news!
Kwaku: Back when mustaches were in, you could to do that.
If this guys were near your children.
Part of you would be like “Mh, mh, mh, mh, Get the…”
Shelley: Get out!
Ian: if this guy was near your children you would be like, “Guys, this is Tom Selleck.
This is what I watched when I was a kid.”
Shelley I wish he would button up his shirt up.
Ian: Yeah, chest hair is sweet.
Shelley: Weird. And just to finish it all off:
Proof that a beard makes you look creepy!
Kwaku: Clean Shaven.
(smiles) Ian: No, Andrew Garfield in this first picture
looks like a 12 year old.
Second picture, looks like a man.
Kwaku: No, he looks like a handsome man.
Shelley: No!
Kwaku: First picture.
Shelley: First picture!
We finally agree.
He looks Handsome.
Second picture, what is growing on his face?
Kwaku: He looks like werewolf. Looks awful!
Ian: He looks like a liberal arts professor that just came out of Massachusetts and he
has this nicely trimmed beard to really finish it out.
Shelley: That is psychotic Ian: he looks like he got electrocuted
Shelley: Anyways.
Shelley: I give it a 0.
Ian: I give this a 10.
Shelley: You don't even give this a number.
Kwaku: Cause he is in the negatives.
Ian: I feel like we kinda have some pre-judgments
of people that have beards.
And you know, I’m just going to worry about myself about my own hair follicle on the cheeks
and on the armpits and on the chest and uh,
I'm going to worry about that and not going to worry about anyone else's.
Shelley: He is worrying about that!
Ian: I’m not like worrying about it like,
“Am I manly enough, like am I allowed to unbutton.”
No, that’s not what I am saying.
Shelley: Grow a beard if you want.
Ian: Exactly!
Grow a beard if you want to.
Shelley: But if you want to, you will look like an evil supervillain
Ian: From the 80’s.
Shelley: In my opinion Ian: That’s fake, that's fake.
Shelley: That's real Ian: I think if you want to grow a beard, just grow it.
The fact that we have to like say that it's okay or not okay is kinda weird.
But…
Kwaku: Ladies and Gentleman Shelley: Of the Jury.
I'm just kidding.
Kwaku: You and I both know, that this episode was pointless.
But it's important to remember we are Latter-day Saints, if you have a beard…
I don't care.
And if you don't have a beard, I don't care.
I don't care what you do!
I honestly don't!
Ian: Get out of here Kwaku. And honestly I wish I could grow a beard and the fact that
I can't makes me cry at night.
Shelley: I stand by the evil supervillain thing.
I will think you are an evil supervillain if you have a beard, or facial hair, or anything.
Don't throw things at me!
You're off screen! Watch 3 Mormons!
Ian: And please subscribe to our channel, Kwaku's not going to come back but that's okay.
Shelley: You can follow us on Instagram and Twitter and all the other social platforms.
Ian: And if you don't agree with us, that's totally cool.
Comment away.
Shelley: Also, comment your creepiest picture of a beard you have ever seen ever of the
best beard you've ever seen.
Ian: And it has to be you wearing the beard.
We are not going to throw out the pictures.
Shelley: Nope Ian: Okay, 1...2...3...Wha!
Ian: Where’s Kwaku?
Shelley: He’s gone.
It's fine I offended him.
It's okay. If I offended you, I apologize.
I probably won't apologize to Kwaku.