Isn't having a new boyfriend or girlfriend so exciting?
There are butterflies and flirty texts,
brushes on the arm that make you light up,
and long conversations over the phone.
The beginning of a new relationship can feel so heady
and come with a head rush of emotions and thoughts.
But how can you be sure
that your new bae is ready for a romantic relationship?
How do you find out if you're both on the same page?
To help you gain more clarity in your situation,
here are five signs that someone isn't ready.
Number one, they're going out
with a lot of different people.
Have you ever been in a situation
where you're getting to know someone
and are starting to develop feelings,
only to find out
that they're going on multiple dates with other people?
It can be jarring and disheartening
to find out the person you like is seeing other people.
According to globalnews.com,
this is a common scenario
due to the popularity of dating apps.
Apps like Tinder, Bumble, Hinge, and countless more
have vastly widened the pool for potential partners.
Online dating expert Julie Spira,
while advocating for casting a wider net,
also explained the darker side to casting such a wide net.
She says that if someone continues to play the field
and doesn't take a digital leap of faith with one person,
they may end up on a merry-go-round
and end up in a series of one-and-done dates,
or dates that don't go past a few weeks.
If this is happening to you,
and you're not currently seeing anyone else,
Elite Daily notes that having a straightforward conversation
about where the two of you are
could be helpful in establishing what the dynamic will be
moving forward in a committed relationship.
Number two, they bring up their ex often.
Have you ever wondered why your new partner
keeps bringing up their ex?
Have you been stuck thinking
that it could mean something deeper?
Maybe they mention their ex out of nowhere,
or reach out to their ex on their birthday,
or still keep in touch with their ex's family.
If you're entering into a relationship
with someone who is emotionally unavailable
because they have unresolved feelings for someone else,
this could lead to a big hurdle
in trying to properly connect with them.
If they strictly engage in polite conversation with you,
and don't talk to you
about anything deeper or more meaningful,
and it feels like they push you away
when you get too close to an emotional boundary,
then this is a sure sign
that they aren't ready for a real relationship with you.
Number three, they don't know what they want.
Have you ever expressed exactly what you need from someone,
only to be met with an, "I don't know"
from the other person?
It's hard for someone to be all in
and ready for a relationship with you
if he, she, or they is unsure of what they want.
It puts you in an unstable kind of situation
with little support.
Wishy-washiness and a shaky sense of commitment
is never a good sign
when it comes to establishing a relationship.
Number four, they're flaky.
Does your partner text you last minute
and bail on plans or dates all the time?
Or if they do happen to show up,
are they chronically late to every gathering?
This is a major problem
when your partner has an inability
to follow through on plans or arrive on time.
This type of behavior shows a lack of commitment
and a skewed sense of priorities.
If they can't or refuse to make time for you,
then you simply aren't important enough for them,
as they'll always have better places to be
and friends to hang out with.
And number five, there's a lack of progression
in the relationship.
Does it feel like your relationship is at a standstill?
Has there been too much distance between dates?
Has it felt like there have been any steps taken forward
in the relationship at all?
When you're suffering a lack of progression
in your relationship,
there might never be a mention of a future together,
or there's no immediate plans being made,
or you're struggling to feel emotionally fulfilled.
According to lifestyle.com,
the progression of a relationship
typically occurs in five stages:
attraction and romance,
reality sets in,
disappointment,
the stage in which conflicts get resolved
and there is growth and a healthy partnership,
and finally, stability and commitment.
If it feels like this dynamic is in limbo
and isn't headed towards the next stage,
it could very well mean your partner simply isn't ready
to take the plunge and be in a relationship.
Did you relate to any of the signs mentioned?
If you're unsure of your relationship status
and feel like you're holding onto
a shaky sense of commitment from your partner,
then it's time to give things a hard look
and choose to fix the issues or move on.
You'll figure out what's best for you.
What other signs can you think of
that someone isn't ready for a relationship?
Share your thoughts with us in the comments below.
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and you think it could help someone else, too.
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are listed in the description below.
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