Hello there I’m Morgan Freeman and today I’m recapping my favourite
Disney Plus show - the Mandalorian. I watched it last year and I’m doing this from memory,
so you’ll have to give me the benefit of the doubt on some of the details. OK, lets roll the tape.
This is the Mandalorian
He’s the Starwars equivalent of Dog the Bounty Hunter
He wears a mask, as do all his buddies, possibly for Covid. We don’t know
We start with a classic bar brawl.
Why aren’t you wearing a mask, why are you wearing a mask, sliced by a door, that kind of thing.
He brings bounties cold or warm to Carl Wethers - but the money ain’t good.
However there’s a big jackpot available, with this shrivelled old dude.
Mando and Shrivels have a chat, Mando agrees to bring in a middle aged man cold or warm
In return he gets a lump of metal and a promise of more lumps of metal
He takes it to a lady blacksmith, possibly his girlfriend,
and gets some brand new 80s shoulder pads. Before jetting over to utah
Where he meets this hairy testicle and learns to ride these two legged slugs
Him and the testicle ride the slugs two times over where they encounter a rival bounty hunter
After a scuffle they agree to work together
They fight off the bad guys and make it inside
Turns out the middle aged dude is actually a Baby Meme
They shoot the Meme
But actually wait, no, it’s tin can that’s dead
so they get back to mando's car, but it's broken down, and he doesn’t have roadside cover
His hub caps were stolen by these ‘nostalgia trips’
Mando evaporates a bunch of the ‘nostalgia trips’ before the parley
Mid parley he tries to flame grill one of them but
they agree he can have his hub caps back in return for an egg
They take him to the chicken coup but gets bashed about by this
chicken rhino. He get’s real muddy and tired.
Before the Meme saves him with The Force
The Nostalgia Trips get their Yokey Goodness and Mando can finally bring the Meme in warm
This guy has spoken
The meme keeps putting Mando’s ship in neutral
but that doesn't stop mando exchanging with shrivelly. The Meme for the metal lumps
which in turn get's smelted by his girlfriend into a full set of armour.
Carl Wethers bigs him up big style but he has traders remorse.
He breaks into Shrivelly’s office to steal back the Meme
But in doing so, he alerts dog and the other bounty hunters. Who try and stop him escaping.
It looks like he’s got no choice but to give Carl Weathers the meme, but in the knick of time his
buddies arrive to help him escape. He's got to get one of those.
Meme and Mando show up as fugitives in this forrest Lodge, walk past this gross ass cat
and Mando ends up fighting this strong lady. The meme has a coffee, which becomes a double meme.
Mando takes on a bit of freelance work, only to find the client is asking not
really asking for a reasonable amount of work.
He says point blank no, but then also immediately yes.
He enlists the help of the strong lady to protect a muddy village from raiders of the lost AT and T
Then spends a minute saying why he doesn’t take off his helmet for everyone
before taking it off in plain view of a bunch of kids.
He trains the village brave heart style to protect themselves
against the AT and T. And then does a home alone style trap, and it destroy’s itself.
He’s about to leave the meme in foster care, but then it gets shot, oh wait no
it’s this guy that was shot. Got me again ha ha.
The Mandalorian needs cash to repair his ship, so lands on tattoine,
which is a brand new star wars place.
He leaves the meme with a quickfit nanny and goes looking for work.
He point blank refuses to work with this noob but then after barely any convincing agrees.
They’re going after someone crazy dangerous. She did something on the something system.
After bartering with these weirdo’s they get attacked by danger lady.
They formulate a plan to get near her under cover of darkness and citizens arrest her.
Ah but they only have one speeder now Mando goes to get the big lizard things
from earlier which noob guards danger lady. Danger lady convinces the noob to let her go,
but she's actually dead on the ground, ha ha got me again! mental!
Noob has been convinced to bring mando in cold to become part of carl weathers club.
He kidnaps nanny and the meme, but mando dupes him super easily. Pays for his parts and legs it.
Still in need of money, Mando contacts his old associate for a job. He joins Bill Burr,
Hellboy, a robot fly and annoying floppy eared alien lady to heist
a prison ship. Leaving the meme with flybot.
The other 4 use their strengths to break in, though the galaxy police get tipped off and
are on their way. Richard Ayoade helps them through the crystal maze and they also make
a big deal of this guy’s strength which seems pretty redundant on this mission.
They save floppy ears brother but mando get's roundhoused into the
cell. thankfully he escapes, tracks them down and puts them in the cell.
and then delivers floppy eared alien man to his old buddy but they want to kill him. little do
they know that he left the galaxy police tracker in floppy ears pocket. The 5-0 finish the job.
Carl Weathers gets in touch, apparently, shrivels has overrun his town, he proper wants the meme
back. Mando doesn’t trust old weathers so he get’s strong lady, teste head and tin can to come with.
Turns out teste has fixed tin can and switched him from a bounty hunter, to a carebot.
They show up to cautiously do Carl Weathers plan, which is to use the meme as bait to kill shrivels.
While camping, teradactyals kill carl weathers, or they would have
done if it weren’t for old doctor meme force. The next day, they travel out into the desert
and carl weathers, kills mando and his buddies, oh wait, no it’s Carl Weathers buddies that are dead,
come on you got me again, oh haha, 8 more times and I might get annoyed.
Apparently he couldn't do it cos of doctor memes excellent medicare. Testehead takes the meme back
to the ship and the gang carry on to meet with shrivels. Shrivels gives some sound parenting
advice before he get’s shot walter white style through the walls. A bunch of stormtroopers and
then Moff Gusfringdeon show up. 2 Endor rejects sadly kill testes for brains and steal the meme.
Endor rejects punch the meme a few times and demonstrate their shooting prowess,
before tin can show up to take possession of the quaffle, I mean the meme.
Back with Gusfringdeon, who it turns out was responsible for mando’s ma and da dying,
he says they have until nightfall, and we find out he was basically the emperors Heinrich Himmler.
Tin can helps break the siege momentarily and reunites meme and mando, forming memedo. Mando is
down injured and refusing help, he won’t take his mask off because of covid. A stromtrooper tries to
flame grill them all but meme has other ideas. Tin can heals mando with some lighthearted banter
and they all escape into the sewers. Turns out mando’s buddies are all dead apart from his maybe
girlfriend, they chat about mangos childhood. She carves the rhino-chicken into his shoulders,
gives him a jetpack and tells him to take the meme to something that no one has heard of, the jedi.
The gang escape down a Mustafar tunnel, but there is a trap waiting for them. Tin can
mathematically calculates that there is no escape so he kamikazes himself,
saving the gang. But they aint out of the woods yet. Cos Moff Gusfringdeon stole Darth vaders
car and is whipping round the sky in it. If only Mando could fly now. he can and does.
Brings down Gidds. So that’s where we are, oh he has a black lightsaber as well. Carl weathers
invites mando back in his murder for hire club, but he says nah I need to take the meme to the
jedi whoever they are. Oh and he gives Testicle head a funeral. Phew. Right, when’s season 2 out.