You're not gonna believe some of these books are real.
Let's talk about that.
♪ (theme music) ♪
- Good Mythical Morning! - Google estimates that there are
- 129 million books in the world. - They estimate.
And I'm gonna go ahead and estimate that of those 129 million books,
there are approximately… (nasally voice) twenty...
one point four million books that are just weird.
Pretty specific. Oh, weird books. Oh, at least.
Yeah. At least that many are weird. And I have devised a game in order to
highlight some of the weirdest books that I have found in print or in sale or in
ebook form, and you're gonna learn.
Okay, well, that's perfect timing, because we are launching the Good Mythical Morning
Book Club today! More info about that after I win this game.
- Okay, here's what's gonna happen… - Haha, how many do I have to get to win?
I am gonna present a summary of a book, and then you have to tell me if it is a
real book or a book that I just wish was real or made up.
- Yeah, fake or real. - If you get five or more correct
out of eight, you win an unauthorized biography written by me of you:
- (Link) "My Hair Goes Up:… - (Rhett) Wow.
…The Life and Times of Rhett McLaughlin," by me.
You really took a lot of time there, Link.
- Well, I… - Phew, boy, that looks good!
- You'll win a biography. - My hair does go up.
If not, I'm going to destroy this and you'll never get to read it.
- You gonna burn it? Okay. - I'm gonna burn it. At the end of this.
- Are you ready to play the game? - Good old-fashioned book burnin'.
- Are you up to the task? (snaps) - Yes.
According to this first book, thanks to 15 years of extensive research,
humans can now harness the power of "telethapy"… te-le-pa-thy...
- to communicate with canines. - Why don't you say it to me telepathically?
- (silly voice) Te-le-pa-thy. - Te-le-tha-py.
- Nope. Yes. - Te-lepathy.
- To communicate with canines. Dogs. - "Dogs."
Learn to speak with man's best friend using the latent power of your mind.
Ridiculous or real book?
Uh… can I get an excerpt?
- Certainly. - Heh heh heh heh!
Quote: "Remember to think like a dog. For the sit command, here's a helpful hint:
concentrate on a mental image of a warm patch of sun-drenched floor, not a chair."
- Patch of what? - "A waorm patch of sun-drenched floor,
not a ch--" I guess that's where dogs sit. They don't like to sit in chairs, so don't
think of a chair.
- (inhales and whistles) Woooow… - Ridonculous or real?
I know that there are people who think that this is possible. And surely...
- Some of them have written a book. - Someone is willing to publish it.
Ridiculous or real, Rhett? Final answer.
False!
Ooh! I tried to get you with a false right outta the gate, and I didn't!
It is ridiculous. (correct ding) But if it did exist, it would be called
"Psych-Canine: Think-Controlling Your Dog"
- Psych… - Psy-ch-ca-nine.
- Psychic-canine. - Yeah. All right, good work, Rhett.
- Here's the next one. This book is a-- - I used telepathy to come up
- with that answer. - This book is comprehensive survival
manual to helping you prevent, prepare for, and ward off an imminent home
invasion by garden gnomes. Yard art.
Ridiculous or real?
- Okay, I'm assuming you have an - Or both?
excerpt for this one, too? Do you have an excerpt for all of them.
Sure, I could work one up. Um, here it is.
- (Rhett chuckles) - "Garden gnomes can't swim, so water
is one of your most reliable allies. Just as medieval castles were protected
by large-scale moats to keep attackers at bay, you can surround your home with
- a similar deterrent." - You know what, Link?
I know that there is this "culture" around garden gnomes. People like to personify
them and they like to think about all the stuff that could happen, and it's like a
comedy book, and it's like, (silly voice) "I'm gonna write about garden gnomes,
and everybody'll think I'm cute and funny." True!
- You're right. It's real. - (correct ding) Yeah, that's right,
- garden gnome people! - Chuck Sambuchino in 2010
published "How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack: Defend Yourself When the Lawn
Warriors Strike [And They Will]." This book answers the question as
old as work itself: How can I do number two at work and still be number one
on the job? Ridiculous or real book? Or both.
I took… when I used to have a… like, a normal job.
- Mhm. Civil engineer. - Boy...
I really stretched out that moment in my day.
- Oh, you relished it? I, I... - Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I pooped for 30 minutes. I know it's bad for you. You can get hemorrhoids
- and that kinda thing. - I didn't wanna poop at work
- when I worked for IBM as an engineer. - Oh, we had a nice bathroom.
- (mouth click) Big stalls. - Lotta people comin' in and outta there.
- Big stalls. Tall toilets. I'm a tall man. - Ridiculous or real?
- Would you like an excerpt? - (laughing) Yes. I would.
"Step two: simulate loud flatulence while continuing to concentrate on the
- discussion. Step three: - False. This is not real. False.
simulate flatulence again. Give your target a suspicious stare."
It's not real. He made this one up. But it's a good one.
- It is real. - (incorrect buzzer) Oh!
"How to Poo at Work," 2011, Mats and Enzo.
Penguin Publishing Group went for that one.
- Okay. - All right.
From the invention of the lightbulb to the IKEA desk lamps of today,
this literary retrospective takes you on an exhaustive journey of lamps
throughout history. Real or Fake?
Excerpt, please.
Here's one: "Enlightening tip number 63: Although entrancing and seemingly
good enough to drink, lava lamps are filled with dangerous chemicals at
high temperatures. Do not drink the liquid inside a lava lamp unless you take your
- life lightly." Why not? - This is not a real book.
Because they would never say that in a book.
They have humorous enlightening tips. That's why they call them "enlightening
- tips." It's a coffee-table book. - Oh, yeah yeah, but it's still false.
- Oh, you're right. - (correct ding) (laughing)
If it were real, it would be called "The Brief History of Lamps."
- (Rhett) Ho ho, creative title, Link! - (Link) Hey!
A book dedicated to unpacking the dating principles of James Tiberius Kirk, Capitan
of the Starship Enterprise and Casanova of the Cosmos. An official Star Trek
overview of his love interests. Real or fake?
Whee, boy. He liked some alien ladies.
Mm. A green woman. There's nothing green woman.
- All colors of women. - You see that Guardians of the Galaxy?
- All alien races of women. - Zoe Saldana?
- I did. Saw her in the airport, too. - She looks even better that way.
She was blue in one movie, green in another one.
What color will she be next? (laughing)
Gosh, so st… that sounds like something my dad would say.
- (laughing) - I don't even need an excerpt.
- This is true, man. - It is true.
- Yeah! (correct ding) - And look at all the women on the
cover. This was published in 2008.
Here we go. A Ben Franklin-penned tome about farting.
I have read this. True.
You have not. It's impossible that you've read it, because I...
- …didn't make it up. - Aha, yeah! (correct ding)
- Did you read it? - I heard about it, man.
- I downloaded it for free one time. - Really?
- Never read it. - it's called "Fart Proudly." Published in
1781. It's the writings of Benjamin Franklin you never heard in school.
This photo book presents inspiring photos of people and cats dancing together.
Also includes moving testimonials of the personal transformations brought about by
this uniquely joyous form of human-animal connection. Dancing with cats.
Not dancing cats. Dancing with cats. Ridiculous or real?
Oh, man. There are people who want to dance with cats. This is definitely real,
but I would like an excerpt to prove it.
"The earliest written record of a cat dancing with a person dates from 1692,
and evidence of the practice is alluded to in the nursery rhyme 'Hey Diddle Diddle.'"
The cat and the fiddle.
No, a cat ain't dancing. He's just… he's just playin' the fiddle.
True.
- Yes! (correct ding) - (laughing) It is true.
Written by Burton Silver and Heather Busch in 2014.
You have won. Im'ma go ahead and give you the last one.
"Smart people have fallen for some pretty stupid stuff. So have politicians
and actors. This public record of the gullibility of pundits and pop stars is an
unbelievably funny read." Ridiculous or real?
- Stupid things that people have fallen for. - Mhm.
Yeah, true.
False, (incorrect buzzer) but if it were true, it would be called "Gullible:
A Collection of the Stupidest Falsehoods People Have Fallen For, Including You
- For Thinking This Was a Real Book!" - Ohhhh!
- (laughing) I got you. - You got me.
But you still win. I've written this book for you. you can read anything.
Uh, actually I just made the cover. And it's...
- What book is it? - It's Josh Sundquist's book.
- Ho ho! - But I commandeered the thing.
- Okay, thank you for the… - I said I'm the author, but I haven't
- done anything. - I am proud to win, and I am also
proud to announce the first ever Good Mythical Morning Book Club!
That's right. We are going to be listening, not reading a book together. Why read
when you can listen using Audible? That's what we're gonna do.
We're gonna pick out a book. Matter of fact, we're gonna pick out one right now.
I'll tell ya what it is. It's called "What If?: Serious Scientific Answers
to Absurd Hypothetical Questions." I've already started listening to it.
It's by Randall Munroe, the guy who created the webcomic xkcd.com.
- And it's narrated by, uh… (snaps) - Wil Wheaton.
Wil Wheaton, his name just left me. friend of ours. He's a Star Trek guy, too.
Yeah. Has he had any romances with alien women?
- I don't know what women he have dated. - What womens have you dated, Wil Wheaton?
- (laughing) - (laughing) But it's a fun listen, so
let's listen to it together. We can talk about it in a subsequent show,
a couple of chapters. One question is, "What if everyone on Earth aimed a
laser pointer at the moon at the same time?"
- Oh, I know what would happen. - He actually gives a...
- Turn the moon red. - real but entertaining answer to that.
"What if you tried to hit a baseball pitched at 90% of the speed of light?"
- That's another chapter. - So he actually goes through the
process of the mathematics, the science to figure out the physics, what would
happen if… to get a real answer to these questions.
But it's also fun to listen to. And for us to talk about, so that's
what we're gonna do. If you wanna be a part of the club, all you gotta do is
listen to the book and watch the show. You can get a free audiobook and
30-day trial and audible.com/GMM.
They got over 150 thousand titles to chose from, and we look forward to you
- being a part of the book club. - Yes. Thanks for liking and
- commenting on this video. - You know what time it is.
- Hi, I'm Taylor. - And I'm [Ismene].
- And we're from Melbourne, Australia. - And it's time
To spin the Wheel of Mythicality!
Don't forget to like us on Facebook, because we do exclusive videos
over there, and we like it when like us, because we need more people to like us,
- because we have a self-image problem. - Click through to Good Mythical More,
where Rhett shares an amazing, life-changing experience at...
- a library? Garden? Something. - "Rhett & Link at a retirement home."
(raspy voice) Heyyy, buddyroll. Good to see you again.
Good to see you, but I told you don't call me buddyroll.
- Call me ruddyboll. - Ruddyboll, did you see Lerlene?
- You see what she did to herself? - Oh yeah, she wore that apron.
- No no, well, she wore the apron, but... - Nothin' else.
- No, yeah, and she painted herself. - Did she? Like, like...
Demi Moore on the cover of Vanity Fair about 10 years ago when she was
- pregnant? Oh! - No, like an alien, man.
- She's got it like a apron. - You talkin' like that
- Zee-wah Saldoony. - Yeah, Zee-wah Saldoony.
- She's like an alien that'll cook for ya. - Mm. Beautiful.
[Captioned by Kevin: GMM Captioning Team]