NARRATOR: This program contains subject
matter and language that may be disturbing to some viewers.
Viewer discretion is advised.
Good morning, princess.
[spanish]
[spanish] for nana.
My name is Sandra, and I'm 43 years old.
And I live in Denver, Colorado.
So I'm married to Jose, just about 20 years now.
I have six children.
I was blessed with good babies, so I kept having more.
EMILIO: She'd always make moments feel special.
My mom always did put kids first.
ALEXIS: My mom was always very involved in my school,
with PTA, getting parties set up.
EZEKIEL: She would always come to our field trips
with my sister and me.
So she was always involved with us in school.
ALEXIS: I think my mom today is a completely different person.
She's kind of everything that I never thought she would be.
It's, like, it's not Sandra anymore.
It's a different person.
I pretty much lost everything.
I'm addicted to heroin.
CATHERINE: I don't know where Sandra's
getting her money for her drugs because she doesn't work.
She hasn't worked for maybe two years.
SANDRA: I'm so tired of waking up
and first thing that I have to figure out
is how I'm gonna get my fix for the day,
how am I gonna get my money for the day.
If the drugs don't kill my daughter,
her being out on the street will.
Not in a million years did I think
that my mother would be addicted and that this
would be her life.
CATHERINE: Sandra was my first born.
We loved playing with her and taking her to parks.
She was happy, very friendly.
SANDRA: I had a great childhood.
In high school I was pretty popular.
I loved school in general, not so much the work,
but the social part of it.
When I was 16 years old, I found out I was pregnant.
CATHERINE: Sandra had to quit school when Alexis was a baby.
SANDRA: I just remember being overwhelmed with just
the need of being responsible.
My dad told me if I didn't, then I could no longer see him.
Everyone thought I was crazy for getting
married at such a young age, but I didn't see any other way.
I knew that I wanted Alexis to have her dad in her life.
Their marriage didn't last.
They were very young.
If it would have been up to me, she
would have not been married.
I was married a whole 10 months.
I remember being terrified.
I felt like I let my parents down.
I took Alexis for a little while
till she kind of straightened her life out.
It didn't take too long because she loved Alexis and didn't
want to miss any time with her.
He stepped in and took care of my older two children
and we ended up getting married.
I graduated high school when I was 39 years old.
I wanted to lead by example as much as I could.
The day that I walked was one of the proudest days I had.
But a whole lot can change in a matter of just a few months.
I have this big ugly scar that's got me really self-conscious.
This scar here was pretty much the size of my whole cheek.
I was involved in a high-speed chase last year.
REPORTER: Parents outside of Denver Elementary School
are relieved to find their children are safe today.
At 3:45 this afternoon officers began
tracking this speeding SUV.
She needed a ride.
Her friend was wanted, so very paranoid.
I sat in the back seat with my babies.
REPORTER: After running a stop sign,
it clipped another vehicle and crashed into the school bus.
The bus then slammed into a tree.
With 39 kids on board.
My babies and I were in the back seat.
EMILIO: Israel was unconscious for hours.
Emily was all scratched up.
We were all freaking out.
SANDRA: And I just remember not knowing if he's going to live
or if he's going to die, and that I caused this,
and that it's my fault.
She lost custody of the children.
But she still continues to use.
She has not seen her smaller children for five months.
So this morning I used about a quarter gram.
So right now I'm working on getting
my next half gram to last me for the rest of the day.
CATHERINE: I don't always give her a ride,
but sometimes I feel really bad.
I don't know if you might have 20 bucks that I can borrow?
That'll work.
OK, bye.
Mom.
That was yesterday.
About four years ago everything kind of changed.
Sandra just went downhill.
VANESSA: She fell down the stairs.
She hurt her back.
CATHERINE: She was having a hard time
just getting around the house because her back
was just hurting her so much.
SANDRA: Sometimes I would just sneeze, and all of a sudden I
would throw my back out.
VANESSA: And in the end, she just turned to the painkillers.
It started with Vicodin, and then
they changed it to Percocet.
It took away the pain, plus it gave me a burst of energy.
I talked to my wife and I said,
something's wrong with Sandra.
She would be up still doing laundry
and it's about 2 o'clock in the morning.
SANDRA: I felt like those pills just made me super mom,
and I could do anything.
Prescriptions just ran out.
She was not able to get any more refills.
SANDRA: I'm home with these two little ones,
and I couldn't function.
That's when my friend was like, here, this will help.
It made everything better just like that.
I was very shocked to know that my daughter
was using heroin.
Her behavior changed quite a bit.
It was pretty drastic.
CATHERINE: Sandra's children were her whole world.
You would think, what am I doing?
It's time to stop.
I need help.
I haven't seen my mom in a few months, probably.
You kind of feel abandoned.
I miss telling her what was going on in my life.
I miss making her laugh.
I just miss my mom.
The last couple hours I've just been trying
to track down some money.
I feel good now.
I just need to make sure that I'm always ready for tomorrow.
Hopefully everything goes through as planned.
As a last resort I have traded, you know,
sex for drugs or for money.
But I do make sure that it has to be the right situation.
I'm very nervous.
I'm shaking.
Hey.
Hi.
Sandra, I want you to know, your whole family's
here with all the love in the world for you, sweetheart.
Mom, I hope you know how much I love you.
We have so many good memories.
You were the one who taught me how important family is.
But for you, that's changed.
One of the scariest things was when you and the kids
were in that accident.
Seeing my little brother lying lifeless with a neck brace
is something I can't forget.
Mom, I'm sorry if I ever made you
feel like I didn't love you or appreciate you, because I do.
But if you refuse this help, I don't have any choice
to not only cut you out of my life but also [inaudible]
and you will no longer be able to watch her grow.
Mama, I love you so, so much.
When I look back to see what has happened
to you and to our family, it breaks my heart.
It kills me to see what you've become.
You missed helping me pick out a wedding
ring, mom, for my fiance.
You missed Mother's Day.
You missed my birthday.
If you continue down this path, you will
no longer be part of my future.
Mom, my whole childhood growing up
was something special.
I had loving parents and a mom who would do anything and more.
Growing up, there were also bad times.
When you were living with us during your addiction
was one of the hardest things in my life I had to deal with.
Every time I hear sirens, I think of you.
And I just pray to God that you're OK.
If you don't change your life, I'll move on,
I'll get married, have kids, and you wont be a part of that.
So please, mom, will you take this opportunity
and go with Sylvia and get this help?
Will you go?
Yeah?
Of course.
Oh, how wonderful.
[crying]
I have been sober for 88 days, and I feel great.
I'm going back to school for my bachelor's in project
management and construction.
Things are falling into place.
I'm trying to get back on my feet for [inaudible]
to go back home to Denver.
My relationship with my children,
it's just changed so much.
They're so much happier now.
They encourage me a lot.
I can always count on them to lift my spirits
and just remind me what's important.
[laughing]
I feel like as long as I keep going this direction,
our relationship will just get even better.
CHILD: Love you.
OK.
Love you, too.
Being clean for 88 days has taught me that I am strong,
and that I can do this.
I am super grateful for the opportunity to be
able to get clean out here.
And I just really want to be the mom that I used to be.
[music playing]