(bright music)
- Good morning, friends.
I just got back from the doctor.
I had a doctor's appointment for my jaw.
I have this weird condition.
Okay, maybe not so weird.
It's like called TMJ and I grind my teeth a lot
when I sleep and then when I wake up,
I just get the worst headache.
Also, when I drink alcohol, like my jaw hurts.
Yesterday, Max and I went to a pet shop
and I fell in love with this black Pomeranian
and a Jack Russell Terrier.
I really wanted them, I wanted to take them home
right there and then, but we know
that's not the right way to go when you're trying
to adopt a dog.
Plus, adopting a pet impulsively
is never a good idea, says Max.
If it was according to me,
I would've just taken him home right there and then.
But, obviously, I'm not single.
I'm married.
So decisions have to be made together.
So in lieu of that, I got myself a Tamagotchi instead
and we're gonna hatch him today.
And I'm gonna name him what I would've named
that cute little black Pomeranian.
He's gonna be butter.
(plastic crinkling)
- I got it at Walmart and I got it in this
beautiful black flame design.
Actually, I haven't gotten a Tamagotchi
in a really long time.
So, this is a fun gift for me.
(tamagotchi beeps)
Now we just wait for butter to hatch.
I'm gonna be like a nineties kid.
I'm gonna put it here on my belt loop today.
Ah,
that's such a vibe.
This design is literally perfect.
This is so my style.
See and then I can just like play with him like this.
Having a Tamagotchi is way better than a dog.
I can take him to a restaurant.
I can take him in movie theaters.
You can't go nowhere.
'Cause you're too big.
I'm sorry, I don't mean that.
I don't mean that.
I'm sorry.
I'll take you anywhere, okay.
You wanna meet butter?
Meet butter.
Here, here, Brutus.
Here, Brutus.
Yeah, that's butter.
That's butter.
So I found out something interesting this morning, guys.
While I was waiting at the doctor's office,
I was reading up on Tylenol
and apparently Tylenol can actually numb the pain
from not just physically, but also your depression.
So if you're not feeling that well mentally, pop a Tylenol.
It's kind of what I did this morning.
I also read that it also numbs your happiness a little bit.
So I guess like it kind of just makes you level.
I popped it this morning because I was scared of needles.
Taking Tylenol will be like the crutch that holds me
together while the needle comes close to my face.
Comes close to my face.
(Yos sighs)
But yeah, added benefit of that on this gloomy day
is that it kind of cures my depression a little bit
and I have a little pep in my step.
Yay to popping pills.
Although with butters around,
I'm not sure if I need pills 'cause he makes me so happy.
Don't you, butters?
Look.
(Tamagotchi jingles)
(machine beeps)
- Another one of those.
As long as that replace a dog, good.
(Max giggles)
- Max is cranky today.
'Cause he has to wake up early to take me to the doctor.
(Max sighs)
- You have to gimme a kiss for being so nice to you
and waking up in the morning.
- Flex.
What a good husband.
- I know, I'm the best
- Wait, I didn't even say where were going.
We're going antique shopping again.
'Cause we had so much fun last time.
(Brutus barks)
Brutus just barked.
- Know what's good about that place.
- What? - It's cash only.
So you have a limited budget.
- Wait, do we have cash?
You grabbed cash? - No.
(Tamagotchi beeps)
- Butter's hungry.
- Is it gonna keep beeping like that?
Then let me take care of butter.
- Kill butter.
- That's so mean.
(cheerful music)
- [Max] Does this place look legit?
- Look at all the Asians here.
They know what's up.
- [Max] There's one right there.
So what are we getting?
- Fish soup, noodles,
beef and chicken curry.
- [Max] Mm, sounds yummy.
- Let's try Cambodian food.
Fish in French is "poisson".
(Max and Yos speak in french)
- And fish is (speaks in french)
(cheerful music)
- Okay, here you go boys.
This place looks so legit.
(Max speaks in french) - Yes.
We're either gonna find treasure here
or we're gonna find something haunted.
- Don't bring a ghost back home.
- I'm gonna bring bad energy into this place.
Ooh.
French woman, French men, French daddy.
- Look babe, there's a creepy ghost girl.
There.
(Yos giggles)
- [Yos] She looks pregnant.
- [Max] Admit that you want that in your bathroom.
- I feel like I could spend a week here.
Look at all these beautiful things.
I feel like that could be a cute vibe for the bathroom.
But, Laurent says it looks a bit depressing.
Oh my god, look at these small paintings.
(cheerful music)
- Okay, I'm the women's bathroom right now.
I'm sorry for this buzzing noise.
These are the things that we need to accomplish today.
We have to get lamps.
We have to get a dining table, dining chair,
and artwork.
Now I'm gonna poop.
- [Max] It's a bit overwhelming.
There's too much stuff around.
- You're undiagnosed ADD can't handle this, but it's okay.
You gotta take your time.
Okay, you just have to concentrate on one thing
at a time.
- [Max] That's a lot of crap surrounding us.
- Don't say that.
These are treasures, treasures.
Oh my God, vintage books.
I'm getting that.
Dragon Ball (Yos laughs).
- [Max] No, Yos.
Don't touch, don't break it.
If you break, you pay.
It's okay, Yos.
- We have to get it.
We need it.
- [Max] No, we saw a nicer one last time at the other store.
- But this one's small.
- [Max] And raggedy.
- This is more fitting for an apartment setting.
The other one was like too big.
- Hey, Yos.
Look over there.
(both giggle)
- [Yos] You're breaking my heart.
You're breaking my heart.
- I'm breaking your ass.
- [Yos] You need to get that for my Pomeranian.
- [Max] That's a bit creepy.
- [Yos] I can walk around the mall with it.
I found the fanciest cup of all fancy cups.
You take a sip with like two fingers.
- [Max] Okay, Yos.
- Do we get it? (Yos laughs)
We get it right?
- [Max] Bye.
Hey, Yos.
Is that Indo?
Is this Indo?
- No, I think that's like Thai.
Not, not every Asian country is the same Max.
That is so racist.
- That one is Indo. - Nope.
- [Max] No?
We've just got one.
- I know, but this one's even cuter.
This one's like speed racer colors.
- You made your choice.
- R2D2.
- This one looks like you.
- [Max] The burger guy? - Yeah.
- [Max] He has my double chin.
(both giggle)
Yos. - Yeah.
- [Max] It's like a maze.
I'm lost.
- [Yos] It's also like a runway.
(crickets chirping)
I'm gonna show you your twin.
- Who's my twin?
Oh God.
- You guys have exactly the same face.
Do the same pose.
The hand, the hand thing.
Literal twin.
- [Max] Press his button.
To infinity and beyond.
Ow, bitch.
(both giggle)
Meet my new boyfriend.
I'm replacing you with another twin.
- Oh my God, he's white.
(Max laughs)
- What are you trying to say?
- The fact that he's white is more shocking
than the fact that he's a mannequin.
- He meant my ex is white.
- [Max] Hey, look on the right.
- Whoa, do you think that's real?
- Yeah. - Do you think that's real?
- (Yos gasps) Don't touch it.
It's me.
- [Max] Yeah, it's a twink Superman.
- [Yos] Look at his bulge.
- [Max] Non existent.
- [Yos] Wanna see mine?
(Max laughs) Max and Yos.com
Look what I got, it's not really that vintage.
It's from 2004 but that's vintage for me.
Max hates it.
- [Max] It hurt my eyes so bad.
Those colors should not be allowed altogether.
- Hey listen, you're white, I'm yellow and we're together.
- [Yos] Wait, you look so hot.
- We're gonna go and shoot some Nazis.
You look so cool.
Maybe in the past life you were like in the army, you think?
- No, I don't respect authority.
Well also 'cause you're gay, so.
A gay soldier, they having a lot of fun.
- Check this out.
That's the kind of thing that you bring back home
and it's cursed.
- [Yos] Good job Max.
- Ten dollar less.
- He's so proud about getting the price down.
He got the painting for 25 instead of 35.
Good job.
- You should have done that also with the t-shirt
that you paid 35 for.
- I know,
I should have.
(tamagotchi beeps)
- Can I tell you guys something really out of pocket
that happened last night?
Oh, this is a story time.
I haven't done a story time in a very long time.
So this is very exciting for me.
If you guys don't know this about Montreal,
Montreal is very known for their night life.
And one of the highlights of Montreal night life
are the strip clubs, specifically male gay strip clubs.
And this was first introduced to me,
I think the first night out when I arrived in Montreal.
This form of entertainment is very popular
in Montreal for a very specific reason.
And that reason is that they go full nude.
And when I say full nude, they get hard,
very hard.
So last night we decided, it's been a while since we went
to a strip club and there's this one very popular one
called Stock Bar.
Each strip club kind of specializes
in different types of men
and Stock Bar specializes in very fit,
muscular, younger type of guys.
There's also another one called Campus
which is more daddy kind of muscle, very big, big dicks.
And there's another one called Taboo.
And they're more for twinks and there's a few other ones
but I haven't visited those ones.
These are the main three ones that I've gone to.
Last night started off like any other strip nights
where we kind of just sat down, had a couple of drinks
and we have a good time.
We're seeing different types of dicks.
When you're married and you're kind of just married
to one dick.
Seeing other types of dick is a luxury
when you're not in an open relationship obviously.
I'm not there to play with anyone.
I'm only there to look at the eye candy
and it's always very entertaining
and we always have a good time.
While we were enjoying the entertainment that was on stage,
I noticed a very peculiar looking young twink
to the side and he was with two of his friends
and he was dressed in a very gothic kind of alt style.
And he kind of looked like Timothée Chalamet.
And I was like, oh my God, that guy looks like
a spitting image of Timothée Chalamet, except he has studs
and was wearing like leather chains and piercings.
So obviously I knew that wasn't him.
A minute later I noticed that he took his clothes off
and I was like, oh my God, is this twink working here?
I have never seen a twink at Stock Bar before.
So I got a little bit excited.
I told Max and my other friends, I think that twink
is gonna start dancing.
Lo and behold, he really did.
So me being the tipsy twink that I was got really,
really excited.
And I went to Max, Max, give me a $5 bill.
I have to support my fellow twink.
I got the $5 bill I went up there
and I slipped that $5 bill under his pants.
And it's the most exhilarating thing
that's happened to me in the past.
I would say year, definitely a highlight.
He grabbed my hand and gave me a little rub on his tummy
which was kind of fun.
And then I went back to my seat
and I think everyone was entertained.
And I think Max loved it as well.
I have a clip that Max actually took
but I don't think I'm able to play
because we're not technically allowed to record anything.
I think that's like the rule of a strip club, no?
Anyway, that night went on,
he ended up going full nude, super fun.
And this is the painting that I ended up going with.
I bought this painting specifically to hang
on my bathroom on top of my toilet.
I fell in love with this painting
because of the aging of the wood.
And then I noticed on the text below,
it says Quebec from the opposite shore of the St. Lawrence.
I just think the whole idea of having a vintage print,
that's kind of true to where you live
is so romantic and so beautiful.
So I can't wait to hang this up.
And anyway, that's pretty much it for our week.
It's been a very entertaining one, that's for sure.
And I'm gonna see you guys next week.
Bye.
(Yos claps)
(bright outro music)