Amazon is rolling out a creepy new
surveillance bot, that you can have
in the comfort of your own home,
cutely named Astro.
Now, Americans will very likely buy
it, willingly put it in their
homes, and
they will in fact be surveilled.
But before I get to
the surveillance component of this
bot, what will it be used for?
What would you need a robot for?
Is it going to scrub your toilets?
No, is it going to do anything
genuinely useful for you?
Not really.
Here's some examples, that Amazon
rolled out in their first ad.
[MUSIC]
>> Hi grandma, I miss you.
>> I miss you too, hey,
you got the toy I sent.
>> Yeah I love it, Astro,
follow me.
[MUSIC]
>> Cool, all right, race you.
>> Come on.
[MUSIC]
>> Told you I turned it off.
>> And now, I totally believe you.
Ooh, yikes.
[MUSIC]
>> Message from Steve, remember to
eat something green today, dad.
>> Check.
>> Okay, great, I hate it, thanks.
But John,
I'm curious what you think.
>> Your curious if I could have
the robot, or whatever that ice
cream was, which would have?
Take the ice cream, and it's not
just because it's Wednesday.
Look, obviously I want a robot
more than the average person.
>> Of course you do. >> I don't
think anyone's surprised by that.
I definitely want a robot,
as I talked about in TDR.
I want to go to space, but
they keep putting me in these
difficult positions.
When it's only A-hole billionaires
going to space,
I don't like it anymore.
When this is what the robots are,
it's not cool anymore.
That video, it read him
the message, but it could have
just been an Alexa that read
him the message, or his phone that
read him the message, or a watch.
Why did it have to be the robot?
It didn't mean anything that it
was the robot.
>> Your phone has reminders, it'll
give you reminders, if you need to
remember to eat something green.
>> The girl was like talking to her
grandmother, seated at a desk.
And then she's like, follow me and
she's like, yeah, I'll race you.
That is fun for three seconds
maybe, and then it's- >> No,
no it's not fun at all.
>> No, I don't want to do this.
They don't know why, other than
the surveillance, they have no idea
why you would want this robot, and
they've got nothing.
I'm not saying there aren't reasons
to want some robot, but they don't
know why you'd want this robot.
>> Did John Iadarola just deliver?
I thought you were going to love
it, I thought you were
going to be pro robot.
>> What am I going to do with
that robot?
>> I don't know, I don't know, but
I don't understand why people-
>> Does it walk a dog?
>> Have the Alexa thing,
right, like why?
>> Well that could be,
it answers questions and stuff.
>> It answers questions, wow,
>> Yeah, its tells you the time and
sets timers, you can just yell out,
I like that because that's
like Star Trek.
But the robot- >> It's listening to
you throughout the day,
while you're in your home.
>> Yeah, I need it to listen
sometimes.
>> I just think it's so
unnecessary and
I- >> I'm making pizza and
I don't want it to burn, listen.
>> I remember, okay,
I remember my husband.
I don't remember where
the event was, but
he went to some sort of event where
they gave out that device.
It's called the Alexa right?
>> Sure, there's multiple devices,
but yes, >> Whatever,
that little disc thing- >> The Dot.
>> That surveills you,
and listens to you
when you're in your home, okay.
>> Yeah. >> And
he gave it to me and I was,
don't put that in my home.
Why do we need that?
We don't need that.
And I get it we're already being
surveilled with our phone.
But there's something extra about
these devices.
And now we're talking about
something that has
video capability.
>> Do you want to know
the creepiest part of it?
>> All of it?
>> Yeah, that too, but look,
I have one, and
I find it to be useful.
I do think though, the gap between
just one of those and the robot
ain't a gap, the functionality's
exactly the same- >> Yeah.
>> Except it's following you
around. But I remember when I
went to the Arctic.
I left, I locked up my house or
whatever, and I came back more than
a month later.
And I unlocked my door and
I opened it.
And I said computer,
because that's what it responds
to for me, and it sprang to life.
And I was like,
you were listening for
more than a month.
>> Yeah. >> Nothing happened,
no one came over,
it was just listening forever.
>> So creepy.
>> That was creepy.
>> I don't know, so, there might be
some useful things for this robot
to do around the house right?
>> What can it do?
>> I don't know,
there was a little more,
a little more from that ad,
let's take a look at it.
>> Astro. [MUSIC]
Let's dance.
[MUSIC]
>> What?
Thank you, all right, I'm in.
>> Why didn't the person bring it?
>> $999 for that for that.
Just get up and get your damn beer.
>> It can't get the beer.
>> Again,
the only thing that might make me
consider it- >> Is the dancing.
>> No. >> I know, you like dancing,
you want to dance with a robot.
>> Not interested.
>> What if Christian was on a trip,
and then
he brought the robot up to you.
He's way far away,
thousands of miles.
And then he's dancing on the robot
face, and
you can dance with the robot.
>> I'd divorce him.
[LAUGH] >> You'd like it >> I
would not actually divorce him.
>> You'd think it was cute.
>> No, I would not think it's cute.
Okay, look, I just think there's
no need for this,so >> There's
literally no need for it.
>> With all new technology,
with anything in life, right?
Do the cost benefit analysis.
So you just saw what the proposed
benefits are.
>> What are the costs other
than the $999?
Well, first and foremost,
Astro is a surveillance device
that tracks you and
everyone who enters your home.
When a user purchases the nearly
$1,000 robot, customers are asked
to enroll their face and voice.
As well as the faces and
voices of anyone who's likely to
be in a home.
So Astro can learn who's supposed
to be there.
[LAUGH] >> All right, no,
it gets worse, it gets worse.
So, Motherboard obtained
the internal documents for
this robot, which the company has
code named Vesta.
Vesta slowly, according to these
internal documents, slowly and
intelligently patrols the home when
an unfamiliar person is around.
Moving from scan point to scan
point, the best location and pose
in any given space to look around.
Looking and listening for
unusual activity,
one of the files reads.
Vesta moves from a predetermined
scan point, and pose to scan any
given room, looking past and
over obstacles in its way.
Vesta completes one complete
patrol, when it completes scanning
all the scan point on the floor
plan, okay.
>> That whole graphic could just
then have as its next sentence, and
when it finds the human,
it murders it.
Human you cannot hide behind
obstacles, it will find you.
>> If the robot detects something
it thinks is out of the ordinary,
such as seeing a person it doesn't
recognize, or sound like glass
breaking or a fire alarm,
it will investigate further.
Including following an unidentified
person around the house,
the file reads.
So I'm sure they're trying to sell
this as like, it's
an additional security measure.
Yeah, I'm sure that when someone
tries to burglarize my home,
they're going to see that robot and
be super terrified by it.
>> That's a point,
why is that thing following me?
I guess I keep robbing this place,
go away robot, go away.
They're going to steal your $1,000
robot, but the joke's on them
because it's actually worthless.
>> It's just, it's so dumb,
don't enable Amazon,
don't buy this garbage,
don't put this in your home.
>> They should be paying you to
have it. >> Get up and
get your own damn beer. >> Yes.
>> I can't stand the,
how can we make people even lazier?
And by the way,
I don't think Americans are lazy,
but physically speaking.
>> No, we disagree now.
>> We do, okay.
>> If it could actually do those
things, I'd probably be down.
If it could get you a beer.
If it could run your errands,
if it could walk a dog,
if it could literally do anything,
I might be down for it.
It can't do anything really.
A Roomba is a thousand times more
valuable than this thing.
>> Yeah, it has utility.
>> Yeah, it has some
goal that it can achieve.
>> Yeah, I agree.
I had a Roomba though,
not an actual Roomba, I
bought an off brand version of it,
it's much cheaper, and I hated it.
It just it's noisy, it doesn't know
what it's doing, it's aimless.
And it's like I'll just freaking,
I'll just vacuum
myself God damn it.
>> Just push the Roomba >> Right,
it's like you already went in that
spot, go in that spot over there,
that giant fur ball from my dog's
fur, get that.
[LAUGH] >> Anyway now look,
again the only thing for
me that would be fascinating,
is if it could literally scrub
the toilet, that's it.
>> That was your first example of
a useful thing, I feel like this is
a particular- >> I'm just tired of
scrubbing the toilet, that's it,
I don't want to- >> That's ten
times a day, it just wears at you.
>> [LAUGH] No