I love this question,
how do I make my husband feel more loved?
I'm Paul Friedman. I founded The Marriage
Foundation.
We get these questions all the time. You
could write in too.
Go to themarriagefoundation.org
and go to Ask a Counselor.
You should definitely subscribe
to this channel because
the answer I'm going to give you is
going to make you feel so good. You're
going to realize there's so much to
learn about marriage
all of that stuff that's out there now
that is
not tied to The Marriage Foundation
not much of it is very good.
You want your husband to feel loved
probably you're feeling like
he may be slipping away or where is that
joy that you had when you first got
married.
What happened to the expectations you
had
for a marriage that would get better
all the time where your love would
become
something you couldn't even talk about.
It was so wonderful
where the happiness just kept growing.
Those expectations are the right
expectations to have.
We get married in order to experience
love and happiness. We are human beings.
It's our birthright
to experience these and we have all of
the tools
at our disposal beginning with free
choice.
What we don't have is the knowledge.
Somehow, our world has gotten so far off
track
when it comes to the individual
experience
of happiness. We get into politics. We get
into sports. We get into news. We get into
TV.
We get into drama. We don't get into love
and happiness,
and there is no better vehicle
to experience love and happiness than
marriage.
You're asking the right question.
How do you make your husband feel more
loved?
It's not that complicated. Now you may
benefit from reading one of my books. You
would benefit even more
by taking the course for women and I
understand it's a little pricey
but here's the thing. We
are human beings. What does that mean?
We're not a body, we know that.
We're not a mind even though western
psychology
says, "Oh no, you are the mind." We're not
our emotions.
We have a body. We have a mind.
We're souls. The soul is pure love. This
is not a religious discussion.
This is the truth. You're a soul. You have a
mind.
You have a body. You experience
marriage at the level of love.
You've gone to weddings just like I have.
There's always that moment when you feel
this like
tremendous surge of love. Your mind
cannot
wrap around it. It transcends
the mind that's where you're supposed to
be with your
husband. How do you do that? That's the
question. How do I
get my husband to feel that love
is by being that love.
How do we do that? W,
there is a way but you got to know where
you're going so I had to describe where
you're going
first.
What happens to us as souls is we get
caught in
caught up in the day-to-day stuff,
the material stuff and we allow it
to be more important
for the moment than
the feeling of love. Something comes up
doesn't matter what it is. Our mind just
goes
laser-focused on that thing
but it shouldn't. What you have to learn
how to do
is to control your mind so it stays
embedded within the love you feel for
your husband
and this thing that will pass
in an hour and a day, a week, a month
will be nothing.
You deal with it with part of your
attention.
Most of your attention is on
loving him and finding ways
to express that love for him
so that he knows that
his heart is where you want to be,
and that your heart is open
for him to come in,
that's it. Now, we don't learn how to do
this.
We grow up in a world that is material.
It's not interested in love.
The marriage counselors will tell you
that love is an emotion.
It's an abstract thought. They're idiots.
They're good people, they're good idiots
but they don't know
and that's why there's such a high
divorce rate unfortunately because
people don't know how to
get their marriage to where it's
supposed to be.
And where I'm telling you is what
it's all about.
Go to our website. Get one of my books.
Take the course. You got to get
into this. It'll blow you away. Marriage
is the most amazing
path in life. I think it's a spiritual
path
because it's all about love and love is
spiritual. You can't touch it, feel it, see
it, hear it, taste it blah blah blah.
It is transcendent, metaphysical
but it's where it's at. You know you take
a look at these
guys like Stephen Jobs. He's dying.
What does he say? This guy's my hero by
the way, I'm not putting him down.
He goes, "I blew it. I blew it.
I didn't have that love that connection
in my life
and I wish for you that you find it."
I wish for you that you find it too.
Please subscribe to the channel. Leave a
like,
leave a comment. Visit again.
I hope this was helpful to you. I didn't
tell you
buy him flowers, cook them a good meal.
I'm not going there,
that stuff -- it's fine. You'll do that
anyway but you'll do it from the heart
not just to get him to think
a certain way that's manipulation. No.
You want to be the real deal for him
that is what it's all about.
Take care! Paul Friedman here from The
Marriage Foundation.
Thank you!