SLoP oN My KnOb
Like CoRn On ThE CoB
chEck iN wiTh me aND
DUDUDUDUDUUD ( that cake tho cake)
MaC
So that was my disgusting attempt of becoming a meme
In 2019
20-nine-MEeeeEME (no stop)
*strained Wheeze
* (No Mac, no)
*gay mac silence*
Y'all might be cringing now (Most definitely)
But I think I just started something
Watch
SloB oN mY knOb
2019
The year where my lease ends and I can get a new apartment
oh my GawD
You guys do nOT UNDERSTAND
Like I HATE this place
Like I hate it
Like I haaaaaate it
There's no room for anything
But that was just Adult talk. I'm sorry
Let's go back to
slOp KnOB
Speaking of brand deals
I might have one in this video
And if I do
It will come riiiight
now~~
wow. great quality content. (i would buy this)
Woooow, that was a great
Thing you guys should get
thanks for sponsoring!
(Laughing but really saying 'help me')
2 0 1 9
A brand new year
A brand new day
A brand new life
To talk about some old shIt
So over the few years we always hear the same -
Okay- wait
I'm holding a vodka bottle. I should put this back (WHeRe hMmMm?)
How chaotic (think of the children Mac, tHe cHiLdReN)
It was on the ground. I wasn't chugging it (sure)
Like that wasn't - I'm not -
i'M sObEr RiGhT nOw
(u sure about that)
Naw slop
Every time I crouch down my thighs, like, cramp
So I'm probably not gonna move... anymore (mood)
So the one thing you always hear
About all of the times over the past few years on this platform
A statement many of playas have played
((gAY Mac SilEncE WHilE Mac regrets his decisions))
Yeah 0.0
Jesus held no fury against this- did that make- that didn't make- I'm just trying to hy- I miss the old YouTube
I mIsS ThE oLd YouTube
I miss
*all hail jesus*
The old youtube
First off what is old YouTube?
YouTube has been around for like what?
Fifteen years? Considering some aspect of it old is like a weird thing
It's younger than me. So like DON'T. What are people
Classifying as old YouTube? Is it the time when (DOdODOooOO) maybe that other time we did (CAGH). I don't know about y'all
For me, I don't really look back at that
CoNtEnT *wheezing*
[sLoB] I'm not saying it was a bad thing. I'm just saying it's a thing we
*thinks of a good thing to say*
Walk forward from, (?) you know? [kNoB] especially been seeing a lot more
Youtubers and creators talk about that as like captions underneath pretty pictures with all their white
friends- we started an entire conversation about old YouTube we can get into another day, but now [cOrN] at the same time
Y'all still making videos like y'all- nobody's dead [where is that cough from] last time I checked so like what-?
*smacc*
What's the tea? (Oh, sorry Mac, I just spilled it) so today we're just gonna unnnpack them
What is old YouTube, you know? Find out that shit. So in order to find out what people classify as old YouTube, what the hell did I do?
I went to Twitter, of course
I'm always going to Twitter like I make you guys do my work for me and then take y'all's money for it
Like have you noticed my bullshit? I take self depriving humor to an entire different level. Lets take it back
Lets rewinddd. So I took the Twitter cuZ I lOvE yOU GuYs sO mUCh sksksk
I mean I do cuz I wanna like spend time with all of yah. Let's be positive. Let's think positive
So today we're gonna review those landmarks
And see if this is something we need to bring back in 2019 or re-evaluate ourselves on. You know? you knOw let's do this
Let's go lets tOOdoO them bOoTy lets tOOdoO them bOoTy [scoOotie Em DooOdie? lmao what does he say] ooOOOOooOOoOOOOH
Who?? what? Who sings that? [sLOb] now first things first
First one we need to talk about at least the first one we need to talk about because bitch
We *clap* cannot *clap* make *clap* video *clap* about *clap* old *clap* YouTube *clap* without *clap* throwing *clap* some *clap* balls *clap* at *clap* my *clap* man
F R E D like bitch. BIIITCH now we cannot sit here and pretend like fred figglehorn
(have you seen his movie tho?)
(lmao you got em)
Was not the main reason why YouTube got money in the first place. Like honestly, like honestly, let's be honest
Fred was the start of all of this (weird snorting). I dont know if that's a compliment or if that just shows
*struggling* was the start of ALLL of this *wheeze* I dunno if,
that's a compliment ( its not)
or if that just shows, *regrets life*
Where humanity can go, you know. Some of you guys probably don't know what Fred is. Some of you guys probably weren't even born when Fred started
(take this advice) Get the fuck away from me turn off this video and go to bed
[sLOb oN My kNoB]
Everybody that like watched youtube back in that day has seen at least one
Fred video from cool people around my age to 45 year old men that like to watch little boys
I shouldn't have said that [sLOb] Last time I saw a Fred video was like in
*music stops*
(sees demon in the corner and is reflecting on life)
yEs. Let's watch Fred goes to the park. uploaded ten years ago and it's only three minutes. ThREe mIN-
Okay, that's one thing about old YouTube. I would love to come back
*more gay laughter* You know how many videos i could make a day if they're only three minutes long.
tHrEe mINuTEsSS
if i were to start making three minute videos right now people will probably think I'm a crackhead or one of david dobriks friends [ooh savage]. I don't know
THREE MINUTES?
*devilish high pitched nostalgic voice* hi, um its fred again
oh my god
hAHAAhAA- ooooooooh
Come through ratio. come through old camcorder. come through 480p being the maximum, OkAy
Old youtube had it all bitch
*devilish high pitched nostalgic voice (illegible)
huge party things. Yeah, she has a really big hangover today
*swing creaks, along with devilish high pitched laughing that could terrorize a country*
*more laughing*
(Fred falls and... aHEM... mOaNs)
*Mac tryna process this weird shit*
18 million views and he's swinging on a swing in a high-pitched voice (oh bitch we know this is some quality content)
Old youtube were that bitch, honestly
Old Youtube was the days
We were all just astounded by the fact that unknown people from the middle of nowhere can do the same shit we saw on TV
Like honestly, and we can click on it whenever we wanted to like damn. That was old youtube
We were still like in that holy shit moment
honestly around the time for all of YouTube was top elations a TV show moments of bloopers some videos of cat having someone make
content not based on any of that was like an astounding stack, you know, and that's what Fred was, honestly...
maybe we'll see now who can really actually do shit on this platform other than shit that we're shitting out! :D
Y'know, eAsY? Fred: this is that dog that usually runs on a playground or community playground- I named him Sparky
*Fred stares at you* I like that name (oh yes daddy)
Hi BaBy
My mom says that they the-the gun thing. They'll think that when they're older, they can shoot it (ok wtf Fred)
Okay, okay *hAhAhA
like he's just walking around a field just living his life as being himself this became an empire bitch like
Platform blew up because of this like you are
Do you understand these cuts bitch if I were to do these cuts, bitch?
Y'all would definitely think I'm on crack. (we already do what are you talking about) but back in the day. That was okay. Do you understand who I talk about Fred first?
Cuz I want to talk about this next one because I'm a biased. ass. bitch.
[nAnA sLoP]
The most highly requested channel for me to talk about (oh no)
one-and-only shanedawsontv (WELL SHIT HERE WE GO)
hEhEhE
you guys might know shane. shane dilly dilly. daddy shane. daddy-dad-dad-dad shane
shane di? shane di. daddy shane. shane-diiiiii
*gay confusion*
N-nevermind.
Conspiracy videosss, documentary he did with Jeffree Star... (king), Jake Paulll (ew) but not this bitch.
This BITCH remembers the Shane Dawson that used to make those PARODIES.
The Shane Dawson that did those SKITS. THE Shane Dawson aka
Shanaenae (ooh yes) aka iT LoOkS LiKe HiGh sChOoL MuSiCaL
tOoK a sHiT uP oN yOuR BoYfRiEnD!
*Mac screams? Cackles? Makes noises that sound like something that would come out of Satan himself? idk* hAhAaAa
The star model of every phase
YouTube had. From making small little parody videos on your webcam. From when
Youtubers started getting cameras, from the long hair... to the short hair. (oooh memories) - TV showwww - booook - movieeeee.
Going down Shane Dawson's channel is pretty much going down the history of what YouTube has done and what YouTube is doing
Pretty freaking cool actually and the one video I want to talk about. The video that's closest to my heart. The video that I think
started it all, goddamnit. Fred is Dead. (yES-) The first video
I watched of his- after watching the Fred special of
iCarly. (omg don't make me cry) When Fred made a video that jUsT sO hApPeNeD to be the same title as Shane Dawson's video
which I think SO many other people found him from. And I think what started at all,
honestly, I think that was THE Big Bang that created the big legend, honestly- HONESTLY.
But does it meet the test of time? Do we truly missed the old Shane we want the old Shane to come back LeNnY
Let's unpack this. (there it is) Ladies and gentleman... Shane Dawson, circa 10 years ago. Fred is DEAD.
Also, 3 minutes. 3 MINUTES BITCH. 3! Like, I take a longer SHIT. (tmi) I-I just want that to come back.
Like, can we bring that back? 3 minute long videos?
Just upload every day, 3 minute long videos, upload every day. Just like shut up and just like, take it. You know, we're tired-
cOmE tHrOuGh
iMovie graphic. cOmE tHrOuGh Windows Movie Maker beginning scene with the fade-out. (omg yes)
10 years ago Shane: Hey you guys, Shane Dawson here.
So I was doing a little browsing on YouTube the other day. Fred is basically this kid who talks in the high-pitched voice
and says random things about medication and his mom and stuff.
CoMe ThRoUgH webcam, honestly. Honestly. Can we bring that back?
Come through with the SwOoP / He just looks like the PhRaSe "I listen to my chemical romance." (Me)
Like I-
((Random shit))
I don't know what that means (Me neither Mac) .
[sLoP]
"SO many hundreds of thousands of subscribers. There's no way I'm gonna be able to tOp HiM" (Haha unintentional gay joke and I'm dying over here)
*gay silence as he realizes everything*
[kNob- ]
Daaamn, old YouTube WAS a different world *signature gay laughter*
Hundreds of thousands. How can I top hundreds of thousands of subscribers?? People can get a million subscribers in a day now. A DaY.
Like, I can't, bUT. Some people have- some people are right now, and that's the THING.
10 years ago hitting 100,000 subscribers, basically meant, like, you were a gOd on YouTube.
Nowadays, (oof you sound like an old man) is hitting 100 thousand's like, "Congrats get a plastic picture frame."
Whatcha gonna do about it?
Young and emo Shane rETURNS: The only other thing to do get rid of him?
Mac: *looks into the camera cheekily* Shane: Yep.
I'm talking about that
*again with the amazing gAY LAUGHTERRRR*
ComE ThrOuGh WiTh ThAt jUmPcUt!
That is ME right now, I can't judge because I do the shit
Every two seconds. Okay!
[sLoB-] BiTcH [oN mAh-] bItCh [KnOb]
That's how we did it right now because I'm that CRAP.
I'm not a killer. I can't kill somebody but I know somebody that WILL. (yeah, your mother, because Fred stole your apple slices)
Get ready, Freddy's coming for you.
*dramatic Royalty Free suspense sound clip*
Come through...
freesoundeffects.com
*in the high pitched-squeak voice again* Hey guys, my name is fReD! I'm all tied up! ANd I don't know where I am... (still happy tho)
Maybe my mom tied me up. (wut O_o) Last time my mom tied me up, it was because she wanted some alone time.
"Mommy time" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
*fart sound effect*
I think I just farted.
*so done* Oka- okay.
COME *clap* THROUGH *clap* JUMP *clap* CUTTT!
That's coming back though, like that is coming back. I do it, bitch. Duh, it's coming back. So like- *Mac noises*
I mean, I'm just glad jump cuts are back for my short attention span ass, okay?
If I'm stuck in here, what am I gonna eAt?I'm gonna have to DRINK my own PEE.
Do you know how hard it is to pee directly into your mouth?
*unholy footage is being shown. it's not really pee, but it's still unholy, like y'all need Jesus*
mY EYES!
*contemplating life itself*
Shane Dawson. aHUHUH-
I can't judge this video that hard because this video is LITERALLY ME in 2019. (well we'll have some good vide this year then)
I'm old YouTube, honestly *lurches forwards for comedic purposes*
Mac: *staring into the camera, dying inside* Shane: I need to get out of here. *shrieks unholy... ly? i dont fucking know*
*fully dies inside* wHERE IS THIS GOING?!?
We love it, we love it. This video started it all bitch. This video built an EMPIRE.
Honey. HUNNY.
Like he's sitting up there and some big-ass house up in the valley while we're all over here. Just coutin' our blessings, y'know?
You know- like, DAMN, THIS VIDEO!
(yESSSSSS) Yo, Fred!
tHERE SHE ISSSSSS! THAT'S HERRR! DAT'S SHANAENAE! AHHHHHHHHHHH-
*gun clicks* Oh mah god. *Shanaenae shoots Shane as he says, "Uh oh."* Oh... my god.
These are the same sound effects Vine users started using on Vine...
Old YouTube comes back in many forms, bitch.
We cannot act like these make it better. There may be more things... but we still go back to that clownery. (wut)
Honestly.. that video is what got me addicted to Shane Dawson
Honestly, he's probably one of the reasons why I make YouTube videos today. (aWWWWW THESE ARE SOFT HOURS)
You guys don't understand-
I was, like, THE BIGGEST YouTube fan back in the day. I was OBSESSED with it. It's still weird to me that I'm, like doing it. (STOP I'M GETTING EMO)
You know? [sLo- sLo- sLo- sLo- nAh] NOW. I have been told in various of threatening tones...
That I am not allowed to make a video reviewing old YouTube without talking about...
(Oh no what's next)
(I know what this is)
(ohmygod)
(well have fun guys the subtitler is just gonna take a 20 hour nap)
*Mac is staring at the camera, smiling in agony*
Hi.
So, my name is-
BIIITCH. *mORE MAC LAUGHTER YASSS*
That *clap* cut *clap* BITCH. OOOOH THAT CUT.
Oooooooh with the small blackout fade!
Dan. *moves hands as if there's meant to be a graphic there*
Nice to meet you. *pauses* Was there SUPPOSED to be a graphic?
Mac. *copies Dan, smiling awkwardly afterwards, clearly withering away from the inside*
Now, I've kind of always wanted to be someone who posts videos.
But I guess I've never really had the confidence... but that was until some really good friends
that I've made recently persuaded me to give it a shot... and so I am.
DAMN.
I can't judge that hard because this was probably my first video on YouTube- this actually WAS basically my first video on YouTube too- I- okay, I- (ya good?)
Y'know what, I'm gonna link my first video on YouTube in the description of this video.
Fuck it, we're doing that now. Every YouTuber goes through the same fucking process.
We all turn on our low quality cameras, our webcam, talking such a low mundane, monotone-ass voice...
and as time progressed, we just start ultimately screaming at our cameras, and that's me. (truth.)
Dan: Please don't take it personally. (what..?)
*makes the stuffed animal attack him* URRGHHUUUGHHR!
(oH OKAY THEN)
*more gay confusion, what has he gotten himself into...?*
*wheezing*
That was YouTube comedy bitch. Like, I can't. [oN mAh kNoB] I did the SAME THING!
We all did it, we all did it! (you're not wrong)
We all came across it! I'm not cringing, I'm not CRINGING. I'm just more like, UGH, yep, WE DID THIS. *wheezes in gay*
THIS MAN. SELLS OUT STADIUMS NOW.
He went on a STADIUM TOUR BITCH. FIRST VIDEO - Stadium Tour in 2018. Like bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch. Money.
[aHuHuH] I'm gonna call it. 2019 is a year where...
I could be makin 30 minute videos, but with my lazy ass... you guys could not see me until, like, March. *wheeze once more*
Is that the old YouTube y'all want back? I think that the reason people say they miss the old YouTube...
It is for multiple reasons. I know for a fact when a lot of creators say they miss the old YouTube, they basically meant
The unsaturated platform it used to be. It was a simpler time on YouTube, but that time cannot survive now.
Let's be honest.
YouTube is now a gigantic world phenomenon. Creations of things that, ten years ago, could not survive this day and age.
That's just how life works. That's just how things progress! Trying to make a TV show that was successful in the seventies successful now, without it
being successful back in the day would never happen! A day when hitting a hundred thousand subscribers
basically meant that you were like the most famous person on the internet. That's more of a... regret not jumping on a bandwagon
before it completely took off scenario. Other than actually missing the old YouTube. Is it harder to gain an audience on YouTube now?
Yes... and no I guess.
There's SO MUCH content on YouTube, like over like a million minutes gets uploaded a second, then at the SAME TIME...
Someone being able to hit two million subscribers. In just 4 days?(Ddaeng, that's a lot. Haha, get the reference? Ddaeng?)
10 years ago? Never heard of it! Literally impossible. I don't even think two million people had YouTube account ten years ago.
There's so much more content being uploaded on YouTube every single second, but at the same time
There is so much more people watching YouTube,
digesting YouTube, spending time on YouTubers... than there has ever been before! (wow...)
Moral of the story...
Don't let the idea of glorifying the past... mentally destroy your future.Life is just a big-ass trial and error.
We're always moving forward and making mistakes. That's just... being human, y'know?
Nobody's perfect in this world,
But if you just... sit there
glorifying how life used to be, all you are doing is creating tension in where life is going! Am I making sense? (Yes you are)
I don't know if I'm making sense. Nobody's perfect. I think we keep on forgetting that nobody's perfect. (True. Love yourself. You nice, keep going.)
We're all trial and error. YouTube is a big-ass trial and error. Google is a big-ass trial and error.
Y'all remember when they tried to make Google Plus and Google Glass bitch? (Ew yes)
*Mac mating call* [sLoB-]
All life is is just trials and errors until we find that beautiful silver lining that is perfect to us. (Really well explained...)
Comment down below. Should I review any more older YouTube videos? Should I just stop to make it less weird?
Should I, like, not talk that much in 2019, and give you guys a bunch of weird ass faces? Just, like, call it a day. (I wouldn't mind tbh you're handsome asf)
Isn't that what people do on TikTok? Wait a minute- [*insert meme here*]
People are like, staring at me from their balconies.
So, my name's Mac, and don't forget like comment share and subscribé
BWAAAAAA- yEs i'm filming a video BiTcH
*text-to-speech* This is the part where the ending music plays [yas] this is the part where the ending music plays [slay it mama]
This is the part where the ending music [slay it mama]
This is the part where the ending music plays [yas] this is the part where the ending music plays [slay it mama]
This is the part [bitch] where the ending music plays. (bye mac :'((( )