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to certain degrees all people fight as
one is that's awesome something about
the human race that makes us unique when
we don't accept what is we don't like
circumstances that's where when they
changes for example if we could just
accept what was what we realize we could
apply we would definitely not be taken
to the air and airplanes right now so to
a certain degree not accepting one in
this is healthy but then there are some
of them who just not accepted what is it
we were like downright warrior team
tortoise we can't accept it won't accept
it as if are some fire it depends on and
when we're that type of person our life
is riddled with suffering why is it
really suffering because what about then
you have to accept you can't change them
so those of us who are warriors against
what is we don't actually get what we
need you want because we're in this
pattern in the universe based on the law
of mirroring otherwise known as the law
of attraction
whatever we resist persists because we
resisting something we're focused
directly upon it and the primary form
that resistance takes is the
unwillingness to accept what is and
reality so for example let's say that
someone that you love dies nothing you
can really do about that isn't it
there's no way to bring them back to
life
so what's most intelligent to do is to
accept that and to move forward with
your life knowing that that isn't
reality
but what do we do instead we spent all
of our mental energy focusing on how it
could have been different all of our
mental energy farming with the
universe's if somehow we'll be able to
get them back if we give something the
absolute health of Hoarders the reality
is too much to accept and so it's only
natural that the only place the energy
can go in the situation is finding that
it even happened in the first place and
panicking about the future potentially
we realize that none of this will bring
them back to life that the reality
they're dead nothing can change that
have to be accepted but know that
releasing resistance by accepting what
is in many situations included in the
corner to subscribe is the hardest thing
you will ever do so we have never asked
of it it is easy as flipping footsies
acceptance is the opposite of denial and
avoidance by accepting something we have
to acknowledge it as valid or as real we
have to accept it as the truth of what
is and when we do that our being is able
to digest it is able to take it in and
opposed to completely regress is doing
that so there are two misconceptions
while people think that accepting
something means that you're never going
to perform the effort to change anything
acceptance actually has nothing to do
with whether you want to or I want to
change something enough it's just about
acceptance this is their reality right
now another misconception that we have
is that acceptance means that you
condone something yet again acceptance
has nothing to do with whether something
is good or bad or right or long and has
only to do with the fact that you're
accepting this is the reality right now
if you want to find your own resistance
all you have to do is to think about a
circumstance in your life is calming you
a whole lot of pain right now until that
you are so desperate to change it's not
even funny
now try to look at the plain facts of
the situation try to figure out what is
so once you've done that you can ask
yourself can man be okay for example if
one of my friends and I are now I'm such
bad terms that we hate each other I may
be desperately trying to find a way to
make it better I may be telling myself
all kinds of stories about why I can't
ever seem to have long lasting and good
relationships I may be thinking about
how it could have been fermented I may
be telling myself all the reasons it is
right to be so damn angry endure because
they're full all of this in the fight
against what is all this suggests that
it's not a patience accept what if so
what is so is that my friend
were once really good friends now hate
each other what is so that I am
heartbroken about it what is that I have
no idea how to make it better can I
accept that just that in truth it has to
be okay
the reality because it is the current
reality regardless of whether or not I
want what is to be different and
regardless of whether I may do something
to try to change what is the reality is
that this is what is right now we have
to accept what is before we do anything
else so here's another analogy let's say
that I'm going on a hike and I have a
map with me but let's say that I just
got lost but and I'm really 50 miles
away from where I'm supposed to be if I
can't accept that's what it is I'm 50
miles off course
then I'm never going to be able to find
course again if I spend my time and
energy thinking about how it happened
and how I should have avoided it and how
it could have gone differently and about
what this means about me as a person and
about how this will impact the future
all I'm doing is avoiding accepting what
is what it is is that I am 50 miles off
course and that feels crappy so here's
where I make this really clear a lot of
us lose our personal energy and lose our
capacity to make lasting changes in our
life because we won't accept what's so
we spend all of our energy fighting
against what has happened it shouldn't
have happened
how could I have prevented it from
happening that doesn't change the fact
that it happened so a much better
strategy is to just accept that it
happened so that you can move forward
from where you are cutting the losses
that aren't lost in other words you are
not going to be able to change the
outcome of something that has already
happened so another layer of what's
happening is that you can't accept what
is because what is makes you feel like
crap and you don't want to feel that way
so underlying this behavior of resisting
something that has happened instead of
accepting it is the fact that you don't
want to accept how you feel obviously if
something crappy happened it's natural
to feel crappy about it so can you
accept that you don't feel good
once you accept that you will see whole
new possibilities that you didn't even
see before because all of your energy
was focused on trying to prevent
something that already occurred let's
take this one step further I said that
acceptance has nothing to do with
condoning something but one of the most
powerful ways that you can start to
accept something is to approve of it so
what I want you to do is to take an
example of something that's going really
crappy let's say your car breaks down
don't start with something enormous or
something that you really don't like but
it's not destroying your life right now
try to find approval for it try to find
all the positive aspects about the car
being broken down and see if that helps
you release resistance to what is
so this means instead of falling into
the trap of criticizing yourself for not
taking the car and to get the check
engine light looked at or panicking
about what it will mean if you don't get
where you're going on time or blaming
someone else because none of this helps
you if the car is broken down take out a
pen and paper and start listing all of
the things that are good about this
situation right here and now for example
perhaps it broke down right next to a
restaurant so you can wait for a tow
truck
indoors perhaps that you are grateful
there is such a thing as a tow truck
service in this day and age perhaps the
positive is the taxis or uber exists so
you can actually get where you're going
on time regardless perhaps the one nice
stop to help you out and that made you
feel better about humanity in general
write down anything that makes you feel
more okay or softer about something
having happened commit to accepting what
is so you don't have to like something
to acknowledge that it is so and then
spend as much time and focus as you need
to enabling yourself to swallow what is
so so that you can refocus all of your
energy on what to do now there is
absolutely no that it's going to come
out of focusing on how something that
has already happened should if it could
have been different it's not going to
change what is and you will be blown
away once you accept what is accept what
is so how fast your situation can remedy
itself
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