Brainy Dose Presents:
Why BAD Things Happen to GOOD People
We’ve all been there: down on our luck and asking, why me?
I mean, who hasn’t asked themselves this question while going through some of their
worst moments in life.
When something bad happens, it’s only natural to wonder why.
Is it bad karma?
Is God punishing me?
Am I cursed?
The reality is likely much more complicated than that.
Unfavorable and even unfortunate things can happen no matter what you believe, what you
do, and how good of a person you try to be.
And while it’s impossible to provide a definitive answer as to why bad things happen to good
people, here are a couple of possibilities:
Being Easily Influenced by Others
When I say easily influenced, I mean that when someone else makes a suggestion, you’re
more likely to accept it without actually thinking it through.
You don’t really consider whether or not the idea is good for you; you just go along
with it.
And when you do this consistently over time, it can lead to all kinds of bad things.
In fact, being easily influenced by others is one of the fastest ways to get yourself
into trouble.
If you make decisions solely based on the opinions of other people, you inevitably end
up doing things that aren’t in your best interest.
Now, we all know how persuasive some people can be; but it’s important that you don’t
let their influence cloud your judgment.
You need to stay true to your beliefs and aspirations, even if they don’t match what
someone tells you is ‘right’ for you.
Getting Attached to Outcomes
Having goals and aspirations is great, but if you get too attached to them, you might
end up setting yourself up for failure.
Here’s why: When you’re attached to an outcome, it means
that your emotions are tied up with something that is to happen in the future.
And when that future doesn’t happen in the way that you want it to, or at all, those
emotions get triggered.
This is especially true for things that seem really important, like having a child.
This can be a hard time for anyone, but if you're already attached to the outcome in
some way, it can feel like everything is falling apart at once.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t want things or have certain expectations.
But to avoid getting discouraged when things don’t go your way, you need to know how
to keep yourself from getting too attached to outcomes.
Being Too Trusting
We all want to believe in the best of people, but sometimes our faith in others can be misguided.
You can’t know everyone’s true intentions, and you may overestimate someone’s moral
character -simply because they seem nice.
Unfortunately, this can lead to situations where others may take advantage of your trust
or use you for their own benefit.
It can often be hard for us to see ourselves as vulnerable targets; it feels safer to think
someone else is at fault.
But when someone tries to manipulate you into doing something that goes against your core
values or makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s important not only that you recognize it,
but also that you take action immediately.
Otherwise, those little nudges might turn into full-on manipulation tactics that make
you feel like a victim.
Making Bad Choices
When you get into a bad situation, it’s easy to think that you’re not responsible
for the problem.
Even if you made some mistakes along the way, it doesn’t feel like you deserve the repercussions
you face.
It’s not like you meant for it to happen that way!
The problem is that we often have a distorted and idealized view of ourselves.
We tend to forget that we’re imperfect beings and don’t always act in our best interest.
People rarely want to take responsibility for their own fallibility, or acknowledge
that they need help.
And sometimes, they aren’t even aware of their own shortcomings.
When you make mistakes, it’s not hard to think that you’re the exception: You think
to yourself, I’m a good person; this doesn’t count as a bad choice.
But when you look at the big picture, it becomes clear that good people can make bad choices
too.
It takes courage and self-awareness to recognize these issues.
But once you do, life becomes much easier because you can start working on improving
yourself rather than blaming others for your problems.
Some Things Are Simply Out of Our Control
You might be a good person, and you might do everything right, but that doesn’t mean
your life isn’t going to have rough patches.
It’s just the way things go sometimes.
And when that happens, it can feel like the universe is conspiring against you.
But really, it’s just that there are certain things in life that we can’t control.
Bad things happen to good people every day, and often without seemingly any rhyme or reason.
That’s a hard thing for people to accept, especially if they’re used to being in control
of every aspect of their lives.
But if you’ve ever been in an accident, missed an important appointment, or lost your
job unexpectedly, you know that things happen, and sometimes, they’re out of your control.
Life is unpredictable, and it can seem unfair.
Some have it easier than others; and sometimes those who do their best don't get the credit
they deserve, while those who do harm and cause trouble are often praised.
The bottom line is, we live in an imperfect world; one where things don’t always go
according to plan and where bad things happen to good people.
The important thing is to keep going.
Keep striving toward something better, even when things seem impossible.
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