Hey Monstrum fans! I hope everyone is doing okay. Thanks to COVID-19
I'm stuck at home, as you likely are, too. So I thought I'd give you a peek into
how my monster-loving brain prepares for the inevitable zombie outbreak... or robot
apocalypse! Bioterrorism attack! Nuclear war. Alien invasion! Major solar flare.
Finding out the Matrix is real! The great flood. Super-volcano. Sharknado. Bees rising
up and taking revenge! Giant mutant insects.
I mean... pandemic. Whatever. I'm ready. So I'm going to show you what's in my
go-bag. My bug out bag, bug in bag, get out of dodge bag – basically the bag I keep in
my car stocked full of survival necessities in case [BLEEP] hits the fan.
Or should I say when it does.
I'm Dr. Emily Zarka. And this is Monstrum.
When resources become scarce it's quickly apparent who is prepared and who is not.
Sure, you could go full survivalist mode and stock an underground bunker or
secret cabin in the woods with months worth of food, water, and toilet paper, but
that kind of preparation isn't realistic for many people and likely isn't
necessary. So where can you look to figure out what will keep you safe?
And even more importantly, help you get in the right mindset to survive in a
life-threatening situation? Horror stories. Horror books and films shape my
life obviously. Yeah, I study monsters for a living, but there are other day-to-day
things, like always making sure where the exits are and what object in the room
could be used as a weapon. Some legitimate organizations like the CDC
and FEMA have some great survivalist tips, and those are definitely worth
looking at... but there's also a few things missing from their checklist that I
think can be the difference between staying alive and becoming zombie food.
Although I was a Girl Scout and taught to always be prepared,
I really didn't start stacking the deck in my favor until I began watching
horror movies as an adult. Let's be clear: a lot of it is nuts.
Some of it is outright ridiculous. ["Oh my gooooodddddd!"]
But there are some very useful tidbits in horror stories that you can use in
real life. Yes, I keep a go-bag in my car. Yes, I pretty much always have a stocked
pantry with two weeks worth of non-perishable food. And yes, I have a
zombie apocalypse survival team of people I vetted who possess the skills
and mindset necessary to survive an outbreak of the undead.
Call me crazy, but my survivor mindset means I'm ready for the worst if it
happens, whether that's my car breaking down at night in the snow or a sudden
hoard of the Living Dead.
Before we get into my go-bag, let's talk about horror
movies and how they inspired me to become more prepared. I for one
have learned plenty of things while delightfully watching horror movies. Here
are just a few examples. Night of the Living Dead: finding food should be a priority.
Then securing and barricading your location. And honestly, Ben is just
one of the most competent horror movie characters out there.
You're Next: no bug out bag here, but
an excellent example of how resourcefulness and survival
training can save your life... even when you're in an unfamiliar territory.
28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later let me know that you can't always trust
authority or anyone who broadcasts shelter...
And if a huge group of animals
starts running in one direction, you run in that same direction! Plus, a plastic
bag full of soda and money is useless... minus temporarily disarming a zombie.
There are also some helpful examples of what a good go bag looks like.
Bushwick has a pretty decent one. There's a first-aid kit with scissors,
gauze and rubbing alcohol; a flare; pain meds; water; a flashlight; a knife; duct tape; and a
sewing kit – all of which come in handy in one way or another throughout the movie.
All right, so now it's time for what is actually in my bag! So this is my bag.
I know some people say that I should probably have like a pack bag or
something with an internal frame, but this one was free – it was my brother's
old backpack – and it has lots of pockets which helps keep me organized. So this is
what I have right now! So let's see what's in my bag. I keep this on the
right side for easy access, this is sort of my, like, defense pocket.
A knife: kind of self-explanatory, but a knife is always good to have.
Hand sanitizer.
Flint: this is a fire starter that I highly recommend that you practice with.
It can be hard to get the hang of right away, and the last thing you want when
you actually need it is having to spend an hour trying to get a spark.
Tiny alcohol bottle! Alcohol is always a valuable resource to have for bartering
and to actually sterilize wounds in a last-ditch effort if you need to.
Pepper spray gun: I like this one because it has a really far shot and I actually
have two shots. Again, protection from other people.
Workman's gloves! Please get these!
If you ever read The Road or seen the movie The Road, having these is
really important. Flashlight: this one is awesome because it's actually a hand
crank, so I don't need batteries or any electricity to use it, and it always works.
My multi-purpose tool! Definitely important to have some kind of basic
multi-purpose tool. This one also comes with an additional flashlight. One other
really important thing to have in your survival kit is some kind of can opener.
So this is a Japanese-style one; it's really simple, relatively lightweight
not super bulky, doesn't take up a lot of space. Waterproof matches.
Allergy pills! I'm allergic to shellfish and have some other allergies so this is something
super important to me. The moral of this story is: keep around medication that you
need personally. So if you have anything you take on a day-to-day basis, I would
recommend trying to get an extra 30-day supply of that and keeping it in your go
bag just in case.
A quarter.
Now moving to the interior pocket.
More workman's gloves! you can never have too many, and if you're
traveling with someone else and they don't have them, you're good to go.
A blanket! For staying warm or helping build a shelter. Yes, I did take this from
an airplane. Don't judge me. Deck of cards: for entertainment, but also
for bartering purposes. People are gonna be bored for the apocalypse, maybe they
want something to do and they have a lot of canned food – you get food, they get a
source of entertainment, everyone wins.
Face masks, for protection.
This one's important: a hand-crank and solar-powered radio. Let's say the
electricity is cut off, or the news stations are down, you can't get on the
Internet; I can have a little form of staying on
top of everything. Ooh! An emergency blanket. This emergency blanket can keep
you warm – which might be important if someone goes into shock, or if it's
nighttime and you're freezing – but also they're reflective.
Emergency rations! They have almost 4,000 calories in each bar, there's enough for one person
for three days in here. Tastes like shortbread, it's actually not terrible.
Duct tape. If you buy anything, buy duct tape. It has infinite uses!
You can't go wrong with duct tape. Buy duct tape!
A life straw. This allows me to drink from
natural water sources that might not be safe otherwise, so I know I can get water
by having one of these handy.
Ooh! First aid kit. Absolutely crucial to have a first aid kit.
I also keep some expired medications, some pain meds, and
antibiotics in here – you never know when you might need them during the apocalypse.
Oh, this one's fun. So I know I said that horror movies were what really
got me on my survivalist journey, but one thing that really started it is
this book: The Zombie Survival Guide. And yes, it does talk a lot about how to kill
zombies, the best weapons to do so, but I think it's really important. It talks
about things like protection, how to remain invisible, look and listen, you know.
Will banks be safe? (The answer is no.)
Not only is it entertaining, but it reminds me of where my survivalist journey started.
Ooh emergency poncho! More hand sanitizer.
So I have a pair of socks because I keep a pair of old sneakers in my bag as well.
After watching some disaster movies where you see these women running
around in high heels all the time, that's impractical and you could hurt yourself,
so I always keep extra pair of shoes and socks, so I have more secure and stable
footwear if I need it. Then I also keep this guy: The Art of Eating Through the
Zombie Apocalypse. What I really like about this is that it teaches you how to
do things like pickle vegetables, make a makeshift fishing line, how to clean and
gut animals... it has some great recipes for canned food and air-dried food. Also, I
like that it sort of encourages a mindset where it's not just about survival, but
about being comfortable – so even things like using spices to help make your
canned food not so terrible or monotonous. Keep this one handy.
And finally, I have a notebook and a pen. Not only to keep notes for myself, or if I
needed to make a sign or something, but I actually took an urban survival
class a few years ago and I have all my notes in here. So things about how to
purify different kinds of water, basic food starter kit, that kind of stuff.
So yeah. That's my go bag.
We've been doing this for a long time. Apocalypse scenarios feature heavily
in many religions. From the Norse Ragnarok
to the events described in the Bible's Book of Revelations.
But these end-of-days stories go back even further, to around 2000 BC: an Epic
of Gilgamesh, which features a huge flood. But what keeps us drawn to all these
apocalyptic tales? Watching a scary movie or reading a terrifying book offers more
than entertainment. We get to experience danger without actually being in harm's
way... in other words, it's kind of
like an emotional and intellectual practice for our brains to learn how to
react. In the mid-18th century, philosopher Edmund Burke proposed that
humans could experience something like delight when encountering the sublime:
something that evokes the idea of danger and pain without actually posing an
immediate threat. This is why we enjoy rollercoasters, haunted houses, and of
course horror movies. As Burke says, at certain distances and with certain
modifications – like a movie screen, for instance – we can experience delight: the
relief of not being the person who is suffering. There are lessons we can learn
from horror. Even if there is no specific monster to point a finger at, how
characters in fiction respond to dangerous situations can help form our
own habits. The overall takeaway? Be prepared. But please, for the love of God,
there's no reason to hoard toilet paper! And hey, if Ron Swanson can have an
emergency Tammy bag in case his ex-wife shows up, you can keep a few things in
your car or desk at work. [SWANSON] "Godspeed."