♪ You used to call me on my cell phone ♪
♪ Later when you need my love ♪
♪ Call me on a cell phone ♪
- How's it going, bros?
I need to stop saying that.
I'm watching too much Pewdiepie.
And it's becoming, uh.
I have a question for myself.
Do I own any other shirts?
I swear I'm filmed the fast two videos
in this exact shirt.
I swear it's been washed.
I'm not that disgusting.
Can you let go of my glasses please.
Oops, oops, oops.
Thank you.
I promised to make this video, I guess it's another
advice video specifically about anxiety.
If you don't know I have an anxiety disorder
and I'm doing pretty well with it so I figured
why not give so advice to some people
who might not be doing great.
Yeah, I asked you guys on Twitter
if you wanted any advice and I'll just
answer those questions now, I guess.
When did you think you first showed
signs of anxiety and how did you first handle the it?
I handled the it not very well.
I remember my first anxiety attack.
I was sitting on my bed, I was sitting over there,
and can I just take a moment to say,
Casper, you are looking so beautiful today,
you are looking so colorful,
and I love you very much.
So yeah, I was sitting on my bed over there and I was
opening a gift I got from somebody
and suddenly my heart just sank
and everything was spinning and I had to take
a moment to just breathe a bit
and afterward I was like, what the hell,
and it was pretty scary.
And then after that I just started isolating myself
from people a lot, just leaving the house
was pretty terrifying, I guess,
I felt pretty paranoid that people were out to get me
and stuff, I didn't really know how to handle it
because I didn't tell anybody for a little while
because I thought I was just being stupid.
The start was not a fun time.
How do I learn to take opportunities more often
instead of backing out at the last minute because
I become too scared?
You just gotta force yourself
because you'll thank yourself later in life.
The main thing with anxiety, I think, is you've gotta think
about the future, because when you have anxiety
everything feels like right now I'm gonna die,
right now is the worst time,
right now I'm so scared,
but you've gotta take a step back and think
okay, next week would I feel better if I were to do this,
if I were to take this opportunity to see friends
or to take this job I've been offered or something.
Also, the more opportunities you take,
the more you learn how to deal with those opportunities
and how to handle them in the future.
Even if you don't necessarily stop feeling scared about
those opportunities it'll become easier
to control your anxiety.
You've gotta push yourself and you've got
to practice feeling scared so you learn
how to handle being scared, I dunno.
Tips on controlling it without medication
and tips on helping friends who have it.
Well, I'm on medication now but before,
and I still do now, actually,
I shake my legs a whole lot, I know I said this
in the last video and people thought I said
shave my legs, I don't shave my legs,
I have wonderful hairy legs, thank you.
Now, I, oh, he gave me a kiss, thank you so much Scoobs.
Oh, another one, I feel so special, thank you.
So, yeah, I shake my legs a lot.
Like, I bounce them.
I used to hold myself back from doing that
because I thought I'd be annoying the people around me
and now I figure hey, if I don't do this,
I'm gonna want to freaking die,
so you're just gonna have to deal with it.
So, yeah, I shake my legs a lot.
I bounce my legs.
I bounce them.
If there's any nervous energy in my hands
or like shake my hands
at the risk of looking insane it makes me feel better.
So if you need to shake something, shake it.
Shake it like a Polaroid picture.
Drawing is very helpful.
I think I said in my last advice videos,
or one of my first videos, that I draw lines,
I don't do that so much anymore but that is really helpful
it helps you get your mind off whatever your mind
was on before, and so is music.
Music and making videos really helps take your mind
off it so if there's something that you really enjoy,
use it to help you, I guess.
And for friends who have it, ask them
what makes them uncomfortable, ask them
what their triggers are, what makes them panic,
and try your best to respect that and respect them
if they feel they need to take a step back,
to leave the room, to gather themselves if they've had
a panic attack or something.
Another really good thing to do is once you know
these things about your friends, once you know
that they don't like certain situations, they don't like
to do certain things, if you're ever
in a group situation and someone suggests something
like, hey, everyone let's go to a party
and you know your friend will not have fun with that,
speak up and say, how about we don't do that,
how about we do this instead for like a different reason.
Obviously, don't straight up say, we can't do that
because my friend here is a nervous wreck.
Your friend will really appreciate that
if you can speak up for them because it's hard
to do that yourself.
And if you're ever with your friend when they are having
an anxiety attack, a lot of people like to be left
alone but its good if--
(whap)
I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.
If you know your friend has an anxiety disorder,
to make sure you know what they would want you to do
if they have an attack, just go with it, dude.
Go with it, my man.
If your friend ever has a lot of attention
on them do something to draw attention
away from them.
So, you know, like, throw up your arms,
be like, hey, there's an ice cream truck outside,
everyone go go go!
And everyone will run away to the ice cream truck.
Do you think one ever could get rid of anxiety?
And someone replied to this saying
I'm not lil boy but I think you can huney.
Well if that response wasn't sufficient,
I'll give my input as well.
I don't think there's a way
to completely get rid of anxiety.
I think even if you feel cured and you manage to get off
meds and you feel okay most of the time there'll
still be times when it comes back and,
what's that sniff for, little goose?
What have I done?
I'm just sitting,
what an attitude.
Do you think it's better to try and step
out of your comfort zone when you have anxiety
or only do what you're comfortable doing?
I kinda answered this in the other question
but I think baby steps pushing yourself out of your
comfort zone are very good
because otherwise if you never push yourself
to do anything other than what you already do
you'll never make progress and you'll never
learn how to handle those situations.
Definitely, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone
is key if you want to get better.
It's essential.
How do you tell your parents about it?
I don't want them to react weird.
I've heard a lot of questions asking this
and I'm not sure how to answer because I don't know
your family situation obviously but I'll tell you
how I would tell my parents about it now
if I could redo it because I don't really
remember how I told them.
I think the first thing to do is to do some research
online, find some reliable medical website
that gives information on anxiety disorders,
do some research on different types of disorders,
because there's a whole bunch,
and then go to a parent or a sibling,
if you're in a bad family situation and you have
a sibling you can trust maybe go to them
and get their help with how to go about it.
But yeah, go up to a parent and say hey.
♪ Hey ♪
♪ What a wonderful kind of day ♪
Hey, I'm not feeling great, I'm not having a great time,
I've done some research about it and I think I may
have this disorder, I would really appreciate it
if you would come with me to the doctor
to find out what the heck is going on with my brain.
Maybe explain to them, like, a situation
where you had a panic attack or explain
to them how you're feeling and make sure
that they know that it's not normal,
it's not just normal teenage angst and worry.
There's other people who can support you.
It doesn't have to be your parents.
There's friends, there's siblings as I said,
there's other family members, there could be
family friends, there could be teachers,
just because your parents don't support you
from the start doesn't mean they never will,
but there always will be somebody.
You just gotta look around.
How would you explain the difference between anxiety and
just stressing out about things occasionally?
I think the main difference is an anxiety disorder
is irrational and a constant daily struggle.
Stressing out about normal things, like,
it's normal to stress out about exams, about friendships,
about money, these are normal things to get worried about
but the point where it becomes a problem is when
you obsess over it.
I think anxiety symptoms overlap
with obsessive-compulsive disorder symptoms in a way
because your thoughts get very,
they go in circles and you get very obsessed
about things you're worried about.
Going outside and thinking,
that car there, that guy wants to run me over
if I cross the road.
He's gonna run me over.
Thinking that if you get out there, something bad's
gonna happen so you'd rather just stay in bed.
Essentially, if it's irrational, if there's no reason
behind the things you're worrying about
and if its negatively affecting your life
if its stopping you from doing things that you want to do
that's not just normal stressing out.
Okay, so I'm going to an appointment so I can get meds
for anxiety but I'm worried that I'm not going
to feel like myself.
Okay, so I'm on meds.
I'm a crazy kid on meds.
And I was worried about that too.
But they'll start you on a low dose.
But all I really got, I mean obviously
it's different for everyone, but all I got
I felt very tired, it made me very tired.
At first it didn't seem to feel like it was,
guys, he's kneading me with his hands
because he's getting comfy.
At first, I didn't' feel like it was working but it takes
you to be patient with it, it takes a couple months
for it to start setting in
as long you don't get any serious side-effects
it'll be a gradual process.
It doesn't take anything away from your personality
it just kind of numbs your feelings a bit.
It dulls it down and you feel calmer
and it's working well for me.
It doesn't work for everyone but that's my experience.
Why is it bad to self medicate, and another,
how do you seek help if your parents don't want to help
and what is your opinion on self-diagnosis?
It's bad to both self-medicate and self-diagnose
because, one, you're not a doctor, it's such a complicated
thing, it's a chemical thing, it's not something
that can be treated or diagnosed through some internet
definition, it's different for everyone.
For me, it doesn't make sense to self-diagnose
because the day I got a diagnosis it was the worst day
of my life because it's horrible to have
that kind of mental illness label given to you
and I just don't understand why you would
give that to yourself when you're not a professional
and it's possible you might not have this disorder.
I dunno, I don't understand it.
So that's why I'm against self-diagnosing.
I know it's controversial, but it's just my opinion,
guys, it's just my opinion.
If you self-medicate you don't know
what's going into your body.
If you're ordering stuff off the internet
that's very dangerous ground and you could do
far more damage to yourself than help.
Seeking help if your parents don't want to help.
I'll put some links in the description for people
you can call who are like phone call therapists
who are there to help you.
You don't need any parent supervision,
you don't need any parent permission,
it can be completely anonymous.
There's also people where you can talk to them through
messenger if it scares you to do phone calls.
How do I calm a shaky voice?
I guess this applies to speaking as well as singing.
I get this a lot when I'm singing.
A shaky voice often happens when you forget
to breathe and that's what happens when you get anxious,
you kinda choke up,
everything tenses back here.
Be aware of the inside of your vocal cords.
Be aware of the space, make an effort to open
your lungs, make an effort to get a feel for what's around
you, get a feel of the space you take up,
consciously open up that soft palate in the back.
Breathing and water.
Water's good.
How do you know for sure you have anxiety?
I may have it but I don't want to get evaluated.
I'm afraid, buddy, the only way to be sure
is to get evaluated.
Push yourself.
Baby steps.
First, walk two steps towards the doctor's office.
Next day, walk four steps.
Next day, touch the handle.
Don't go in.
Next day, touch the handle, open the door.
Don't go in.
Next day, take a step in, and then leave.
Next day, take a step in, make an appointment,
and then cancel it.
Next step. (laughs)
So, I'm seeing a lot of questions
about things to distract you.
Get a pet.
That is my number one thing
because when you're anxious it can feel
like it's all about you but when you get
a little friend, then it's not about you anymore.
You've got to take care of your little friend.
He's helped me a whole lot.
I hope I've answered your question in some way.
I've also sorry if I've repeated myself,
if I've said anything that I've said
in a video or in a stream.
My memory isn't very good, I'm sorry.
I hope this video helped you.
Caspy's giving you a little wink.
(ping)
Yeah, stay safe, and don't forget to,
oh, speaking of forgetting, I almost forgot something.
I almost forgot.
I just want to give a quick shout-out to my friend
and his movie, he made a short film,
you should go and check it out.
There's a little preview right here,
you can see it, Casper's modeling it,
he's poking his little face out the top of it.
Some awesome cinematography and there'll be a link
if you click on that video or you click the link
down in the description you can go
check out the video.
Yeah, watch the video.
Like the video.
I'm gonna go do a wee and, yeah. Goodbye.
(chill music)