Another episode of "What The Fit."
I, of course, am your host Kevin Hart.
I would not be your host if I was just by myself.
That's no fun.
You gotta have amazing people to be with, talk to,
to experience these-- these fun-filled activities with.
And today I got my guy James Van Der Beek here.
- How you doing? - I'm good, bud. How you doing?
Good to see you, man. I'm good.
Where you at with fitness?
- I got a newborn at home. - Whoo!
So it's been a minute since I've been in shape.
- Kevin: Is the wife breastfeeding? - James: Yes.
I had a dream once I was breastfeeding.
- Oh, my God. - And I gotta be honest,
I woke up kinda sad that I couldn't do it.
What if we competed in a decathlon today?
- A decathlon. - We got a high school track team
- Okay. - that we're gonna be out there with.
And also we got two Olympic gold medalists.
- Wow. - So this way, we can do the decathlon properly.
- Okay. - Okay?
The loser has to go
in the classroom on a college campus
- Okay. - and pose nude for--
for an art-- an art drawing.
- For the art class? - Yeah, like an art-- the art class.
- We gotta stand up there. - Stand?
We gotta let it all bear out.
And I'm very nervous
about trying to pose if I'm--
if I'm not-- if I'm not at least at half mast.
You definitely don't-- Yeah.
It's a hot day. There might be a lot of air-conditioning--
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I don't want--
I don't wanna get hit with daytime peen,
and that-- that's what I leave--
- that's what I leave on this campus. - Daytime peen.
Yeah, daytime peen.
- You know, my daytime peen ain't ( bleep ). - I think that--
That's what their painting should be called.
"Daytime Peen."
Right there, puts enough "go get it" in both of us
so we go out here and give this our all.
- What do you think? - All right.
I think nothing like humiliation is a motivation.
It's a great motivation.
- I'm melting. - That's easy!
I believe in making an entrance.
- Okay. - I think it's very important
to set the tone of how today is gonna go.
- Okay. Okay. - All right?
Kevin: Flame on!
USA!
Oh, my gosh.
USA!
( music playing )
- You guys okay back there? - Men: Yes, sir.
All right, you guys look great.
Kevin: USA!
You wanna hold it a little bit?
- I'll hold it, sure. - Yeah, yeah.
Share the torch.
I'm gonna be a little honest with you.
- Yeah? - I gave it to you because it was--
it was too heavy for me.
- I'm realizing that right now. - Yeah.
He run like an old man.
He looks a little constipated.
Here, give it to me. It needs to look like I had it the whole time.
- Ok. There you go. - Watch your hair!
All right.
So, go ahead and introduce yourselves and break down who you are.
I'm Carmelita Jeter, fastest woman alive.
Gold, silver, bronze medalist from the 2012 London Games.
- Wow. - Anchor leg from that 40.82 world record
- Wow. - that broke 27-year world record.
Well, that's what I did when I ran in my church league.
My name is Ashton Eaton, two-time Olympic gold medalist in the decathlon.
- Both: Wow. - Won in 2012 and 2016.
- World record holder as well. - Yeah.
- We're with Code Black track club. - Okay. Okay.
- My name is James. - Yeah.
My qualifications are
calling for my stunt double when needed
and I've got-- I got pretty good hair.
- There you go, there you go. - I would say
- that's probably-- - I'll give you the hair.
That's probably what makes me most qualified to be out here today.
Uh, Kevin Hart, and I have two track teams
that I ran on in a church league.
Youth Christian Runners.
I anchored that. I also ran anchor with The Ushers.
I wonder what they said when they passed the baton.
- Thank you, Jesus. - Amen!
Thank you, Jesus.
Communion.
- That's amazing. Wow. - Ash: All right.
First we're gonna do the 110-meter hurdles.
Off the back?
- Off the back. - Carmelita: Off the back!
Carmelita: Come on, you got it!
We have Tara in the building,
who's gonna, you know, give you a little lesson.
I'm gonna show you how to get in the blocks properly.
- You hold it there. - Yep.
- When the gun clicks, you explode. - Bow! Bow!
Bow! Oh! Okay.
- That's right, Tara. I'm gonna smoke your ass. - What?
Wait, I forgot which lane I was in.
Well, you need to figure it out.
- Let's go now. - All right.
Kevin: Wait, give me a second. God.
- This the lane, too, right? - Yes.
- Yes. - All right, well, get out of my lane.
- You ain't intimidating nobody, Tara. - On your mark.
Wait a second! Why you so in a rush?
Goddamn!
- ( groans ) - I think speed's kinda her thing, bro.
No, no, no. It used to be her thing,
until she came across a legend.
Head down.
Remember, you cannot leave out of the block until I shoot the gun.
Will you come on?
God!
Set.
- ( gunshot ) - Oh! Catch her!
- Come on! - Catch her! Oh, Jesus!
- Go! - Let's go, let's go! Get your feet down!
Goddamn! Goddamn!
- What the-- Oh! - Woman: Get him, James! Get him, James!
Get him, James!
- Go, James! - Whoo! Whoo!
Go, James! Go, James!
- I hate you now! - Whoo!
That was sick.
- James, nice work, man. - Thank you, man.
So the winner of 100-meter 110-hurdles...
- ...James! - ( cheers )
Ashton: Nice work, Tara. The real winner.
I don't know what happened,
but as I jumped in the air,
I just saw James' hair fly by me.
- Let's go to the shot put. - Is the shot put in the shade?
♪ Come on, come on ♪
( grunts )
Technique of the shot put is you have to have the shot in your neck.
- Ah. - Has to be touching your neck.
- Has to be touching your neck. - That's a lot of germs.
( laughs )
You can get across the ring however you want.
You turn that.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, I see why he sucked.
It's about where it hits and not rolls.
- All right, James, first up. - All right.
- Okay, James. - You see what you gotta do.
Good luck, James.
- Here we go. Ready? - Good luck.
Good luck, James.
- No pressure. - ( grunts )
- Wow! - That's a good throw.
Stop cheating, Carmelita! What the--
- What was that? - Listen.
- Come on! You're not even-- - Listen!
- You put the flag in there two different times! - I didn't.
- God! - Just-- just throw it further than that
and you win, dude.
You guys don't stand a chance.
- All right. - Wow.
Try to hit me.
( grunts )
- ( grunts ) - Let's hear that grunt.
( grunts )
I'm about to-- Ooh, let's get it.
Ooh!
Jeez, I thought he was gonna throw it.
Just throw it already!
Stop throwing me off then!
- Now he's gotta start all over. - Yeah! Now I gotta go back to my routine.
Just watching you is exhausting.
- ( grunts ) - Ooh.
- ( grunts ) - Oh!
So the winner of this event is...
- If I win, do I get to see how far I can throw Kevin? - Yes.
...Kevin Hart.
Wow.
What is that?
It was very close, James.
- Yeah. - You almost got him.
- I kinda like it. - Yes!
Yeah, I don't have technique.
Yeah, I don't know the proper way to do it.
And, yes, this sun is definitely baking me
to a point where I can't see.
But I'll be damned if I'ma lose.
We could drop Kevin Hart behind enemy lines
in any condition against any army
and through sheer determination and force of will,
- I'ma figure it out. - my money's on Kevin.
I'ma figure it out.
The next event we have up today, long jump.
It's 1-1.
Me and James got a little competition on the line.
- It's a game. - I sure would hate for the world to see
that day peen.
The number one thing that we have to do
when we're doing long jump is A, you gotta run fast.
- Got you. - Okay?
B, you have to hit the white board
or jump before the white board.
Ready? Set.
Set.
- And... let's go. - ( wheels squeaking )
- Here we go. - ( squeaking continues )
Okay, what are we doing with the cart, guys?
- Stop throwing off my mental. - ( squeaking stops )
I'm focused. I'm locked in.
Don't move.
- One, two, and... - ( cart beeping )
Whoo!
- Good luck, James. No pressure. - Come on, come on.
- All right, here we go. - Daytime peen.
- Come on. Come on. - Daytime peen.
Here we go.
- Oh! - Okay.
- Did he get it? - He might've got it.
- Did he get it? - Nah.
D'oh!
Carmelita: The winner, Kevin Hart.
( laughs )
All right. All right.
- James. - When's the high jump?
It is hotter than hell.
Van Der Leap goes first.
Carmelita: Come on, James.
- Tara: Come on, James. - James, I want to remind you,
we got a bet.
The loser gotta go to the college
and let the college kids
paint him naked.
- Oh! - Goddamn it!
Ashton: That's incredible.
Goddamn it!
James, you got technique, though.
Oh, God.
Jesus Christ.
I'm just gonna throw this out there.
I don't think this is the event for small guys.
Come on, Kevin! This is what you do.
This is what separates you from everybody else.
- Come on, now. - You're a winner.
It's a pit bull. Where?
I need motivation.
( barking )
Get your dog, man.
Get your ( bleep ) dog, man!
Get your dog!
Yo, get that dog!
- Oh! Oh, God! - Oh!
The pit bull bit me on the ass.
- Wow. - The winner, James.
Well-deserved.
- It's well-deserved, James. - Thank you.
So now we're 2-2.
Now that it's a tie, we're gonna run the 100-meters.
- Okay. - Kevin: Yeah.
All right, here we go.
In lane one we have James,
in lane two we have Kevin, and in lane three
we have the California State Champion Dee.
Stand behind your blocks.
Wait a minute. Goddamn. Hold on.
- Hold on. - This is it.
- Wait a second. - On your mark!
Wait a minute, Carmelita. Everybody relax.
( bleep )
- James. How do you feel? - Yeah.
I'm tired and I'm hot.
In the final, everybody's exhausted.
In the final, it comes down to heart.
Who got it, who want it.
Are we ready?
- James, you ready? - Ready!
- These rocks hurt my knees. - Kevin, you ready?
- The rocks hurt-- - Dee, you ready?
This is the Olympics.
This is the world championship.
This is it.
Everything that you worked for,
everything that you trained for,
it goes down here.
Your life is right now.
On your mark, get set...
Day peen.
( gunshot )
- Come on, Dee! - Wow!
- Come on, Dee. - Ash: He's so fast.
- ( crowd cheering ) - ( panting )
Whoo!
Whoo-hoo-hoo! Nice run!
James, you're a great competitor.
High-five it.
Your little ass can move.
You, sir, are today's greatest athlete.
- ( panting ) - There you go.
Did it for my country.
What I'm saying, guys, is this.
It's all about bettering yourself.
Today was a day where you saw James and myself dig deep
and do what we haven't done
and compete at a very high level.
I'm making an announcement
that I will be joining the 2022 Olympic team.
- Today you saw-- Yeah, 2020. - 2020.
I wouldn't bet against you.
I'll see you in Tokyo.
- USA. USA. - USA. Race for America.
- Good job, James. - USA.
James, lost a bet.
( music playing )
Day peen.
Kevin Hart here, the gold medalist.
Just joking. I got a silver.
Look, to see more speed and agility from today's activities,
subscribe to our YouTube channel,
the Laugh Out Loud channel.
And after you do it, you get to see more of me.