There are few evil characters who delight in their villainy more than Springfield's
resident billionaire industrialist, Charles Montgomery Burns. And today, we’re looking
at the worst things that Mr. Burns has ever done in the long history of The Simpsons.
In one of his most diabolical and high-profile acts of Bond-level villainy, Mr. Burns once
constructed a giant disc designed to cast the entire town of Springfield in shadow for
24 hours per day. In effect, the plan was to force Springfield to rely on electricity
supplied by his nuclear power plant rather than natural sunlight.
The act proved to be the catalyst for the infamous "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" two-part mystery
that saw the entire town outraged by Burns for plenty of other reasons. Earlier in the
episode, the town turned on him after he tapped an oil well beneath Springfield Elementary,
causing the school to lose funding and the town to be plagued by environmental disaster.
The sun-blocking plan, however, was so vile that even Smithers broke rank and had to walk
away from his life with Burns.
"I don't want any part of this project it's unconscionably fiendish "
"I will not suffer your insubordination!"
And after announcing his nefarious plan to the entire town, who are now armed to the
teeth, Burns might've thought he'd crossed the threshold from infamy to invincibility,
but a swift shot from an unlikely townsperson put an end to that perception. Still, Burns
blocking the sun remains among his most high-profile acts of villainy. It showed that he was okay
with the entire town wanting him dead if it meant a few more bucks in his wallet.
When The Simpsons returned for its seventh season, the finale of the "Who Shot Mr. Burns?"
two-parter revealed that it wasn't the grand villainous plan to block out Springfield's
sun, or even any of his other considerable acts of greed that got him shot. Instead,
it was an even more craven and petty act.
Mr. Burns straight-up tried to take candy from a baby.
After appearing to conquer the sun, Burns felt even more invincible and entitled to
do whatever he pleased. In his case, that meant stealing a lollipop from Maggie Simpson.
Unfortunately for him, he was unaware that his pistol was precariously placed in its
holster, and in the old man's struggle with the baby, the gun went off into his chest,
giving him some much-needed comeuppance.
In the episode "The Trouble with Trillions," it's revealed that after World War II, President
Harry Truman minted a one trillion-dollar bill in an effort to reconstruct post-war
Europe. The U.S. government then tasked a spry, young Mr. Burns with flying the money
to Europe. Surprise, surprise — it never arrived. Obviously, stealing an incomprehensible
amount of money meant to help people after one of the most devastating pieces of human
history alone has got to be one of Mr. Burns' worst acts, but wait, there's more.
After Homer helps discover that Burns still has the bill, the FBI bursts in to arrest
him, but Burns manages to escape by fleeing the country. The second part of his escape
plan? Buying a tiny little Caribbean island he found on a map. Unfortunately, that island
happens to be Cuba, which some will note is kinda spoken for when it comes to land agreements.
Armed with a trillion dollars in cash, though, Burns attempts to just purchase the country
from its president, Fidel Castro. Castro proves to be a little too cunning for Burns, though:
he just asks to see the bill and then pretends it was never handed to him. With that, Burns
returns to the states, defeated, but like most super-rich criminals, he never actually
faces any consequences.
"Two Dozen and One Greyhounds," from the sixth season of The Simpsons, is responsible for
one of the better toe-tappers in the show's long musical history. It's also one of Burns'
most evil acts to date — especially if you're an animal lover.
"He's gonna make a tuxedo out of our puppies !"
"Na na nah, na na nah, na nanaaah!" "Bart!"
"Sorry, you gotta admit it's catchy."
When the Simpson family dog, Santa's Little Helper, gets a little frisky with another
greyhound, the family finds themselves the proud-yet-overwhelmed owners of 25 puppies.
Although they make a valiant effort to care for the dogs, they're forced to sell them.
As they debate letting an oddly interested Burns take the whole litter, the devious tycoon
steals them when their backs are turned.
Fortunately, Bart and Lisa track them down at Burns Manor and hear him sing his plans
to make the dogs into a tuxedo. It turns out he's been making clothes from adorable animals
for years. That's bad enough to merit inclusion on a list of his worst acts, but doing in
two dozen puppies for the sake of fashion is a new level of evil.
Fortunately, Bart and Lisa intervene before he can do his grim tailoring job, but Burns
holds the two kids at gunpoint in order to stop them. In the end, Burns is convinced
that he shouldn't off the dogs and vows to never wear the fur of another animal … as
long as they can do an amusing trick. Sorry, gophers.
This is a unique inclusion on the list because it marks a rare occasion in which Burns doesn't
revel in his villainy. Instead, his bad behavior merely comes from a deeply misguided place.
After a series of bad investments causes Burns to lose his vast fortune, the episode "The
Old Man and the Lisa" sees him forced to live the life of an average Joe, even shacking
up with Smithers for a brief period. However, his quest to find fulfillment as an impoverished
elderly person is short-lived as his life quickly spirals out of control and lands him
in the Retirement Castle.
When Lisa Simpson comes around on a crusade to increase Springfield's recycling, Burns
decides to mend his previously greedy ways by attempting to give back. It seems like
things are going well as Lisa's desire to help the environment meshes with Burns' business
acumen. However, upon the opening of the Little Lisa Recycling Plant, Burns reveals that he's
strung together hundreds of plastic six-pack holders to "sweep the sea clean" of both waste...
and marine life. In a horrific but very well-animated shot, we see hundreds of animals being dragged
from the ocean and turned into a meat slurry that Burns then sells.
"And best of all, it's made from 100% recycled animals."
Lisa is obviously horrified, much to the confusion of Burns, who genuinely believes he merely
took recycling to the next level. Although this is by far one of Burns' worst acts, it's
scary to think that this kind of carnage is what happens when he goes with his best intentions
instead of his worst.
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