My next guest,
you know him from 'Space Force' on Netflix,
Mandalorian, Bojack Horseman.
Please welcome my very funny friend Asif Ali.
Asif, thank you for being here.
Oh man! You know what, Moses?
This is exactly,
this is exactly what I was,
what I was hoping for.
To meet you in this setting
and finally get to see the inside of,
of where you live and you didn't disappoint, man.
You didn't disappoint.
You have the Saudi Orb that Trump
and those guys put their hands on.
I'm really pumped about it.
I'm also in the book.
You're in the book.
Let's see, did you do something fun for the book?
You look sad.
No, just sad, it's a sad guy.
So you just did exactly your DMV photo for that
You know...
(chuckles)
But you know how you were on,
on the white page.
I was, we got the, I got the Brown section here.
You got the Brown section.
Yeah.
Give Hassan the full page.
Give him the full page.
I mean, he deserves it, you know.
He is an icon.
And I love that they gave him,
they picked the worst,
for someone that is constantly lauded on his perfect hair.
(chuckles)
It was,
It looks embarrassing.
This book is a take-down to Hassan Minhaj.
It's a full take down.
But his hair, and he the one time he didn't get a fade up,
we got the sides going wild.
Oh man!
How are you doing?
Because it feels like you've stayed busy
because you do a lot of voiceover work.
You have an incredible voice.
I've been getting into the voice game.
I'm doing the show called 'Devil May Care' for Sci-Fi,
that will be out whenever they're done editing that.
I did like a thing on 'The Star Trek', lower decks.
And what if I just continued doing that for 45 minutes?
Yeah, really good.
The amount of things are on
your shortlisting commercials you're on.
As you sink lower and lower in your chair.
In high school, I ran the eight minute mile.
Yeah, absolutely, definitely, keep going.
But I'm, yeah, I've been doing voiceover.
That's been fun.
You're doing voiceover work.
It seems like you got a really great job
before the shutdown.
You're on the Mandalorian.
Yeah, I did the Mandalorian.
That was a great gig.
They, they, it was so expensive.
And you know,
you and I will , we'll usually do,
we'll do like an indie thing, right?
Or like most normal television show, right?
Even like 'Sunnyside'.
It's just a TV show.
And it's like...
Indie show, yeah.
You get that it's a TV show.
Kal Penn at a couple of GoPros.
And then you go on a show and you're like, Oh,
if this is the whole company,
this isn't just like a,
or if this doesn't do well or whatever,
we'll be fine.
There's always pilot season.
And then there's shows where it's like,
this is the fourth quarter.
We have merchandise,
we have a whole, you know,
a hundred million dollar ad campaign.
We have a whole thing and if it's,
if people are not wearing big dog size T-shirts,
and these are not flying off the shelves,
our whole company will go under.
And so when you're working on a thing like that,
I remember I got there and walking from the door
to where our rooms are,
we had to wear a full cloak with a hood
because where we were shooting,
there was a particular part of like
a highway overpass thing.
And the lady was saying that people were camping out.
Like they were getting dropped off.
Like paparazzi were driving and being like,
I'll jump out grand theft auto style,
just to maybe get a long distance photo
of someone's random outfit.
And then some person who's so into 'Star Wars',
can sort of put together like, Oh,
that guy's hat
and his shoes means that he might be from this planet,
which might mean that the story could be
about going from here,
which might be that.
Cause they're, they're insane about it.
So everyone wants a piece.
If you do anything that's Star Wars related,
people wanna know things,
(indistict) there's whole websites that are just
about getting the exclusive.
So you had to wear a whole cap in the off chance
that someone would be on a highway
and then pick up a blurry photo of you
and then piece together that you were one on this,
and a crucial part of the story.
And the crazy part is like, okay,
I can tell the guy getting dropped off
and just being on a highway overpass, taking photos,
but then like,
how does he coordinate the pickup?
Yeah.
And if you've ever dropped anything on the highway,
it's, it's you gotta take another 80 minute lap.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
It's a very, it's a very tough thing.
I'm doing, I'm like in the middle of doing a, a Marvel show.
And so we shot 80% of that, and then.
It's just all credits.
This whole interview is just all credits.
And we're bringing Jay Larson on and he's like,
I dunno, I'm like a dad.
I have like a life.
And so I only bring this up to say
that when people take it that seriously,
like I was talking to a dude on there and they're like,
it's like a double edged sword of like,
you don't want that kind of craziness while you're making
the show because people are like trying
to sneak into everyone's Instagram,
to try to like put clues together,
like their detectives.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Are you the before picture of Kumail Nanjiani?
You did your bucket?
I went out for it.
It was a very offensive other shit.
This is the pre-protein shake version.
(indistinct)
Well, you do some re-shoots with the beginning of this.
You're not strong enough.
And I'm like, I'll show you.
(Chuckles)
It should be a credit.
Just the before picture of Kamala and Johnny.
If people know exactly what you're going in for.
Can I tell you something?
Before I finish that.
I cannot stress to you how many times
and this is even with glasses onset
and this might be subconsciously
why I wear the glasses too.
How many times people will come up to me,
I guess in LA,
it's like an LA thing, and be like, Oh,
you did a great job in the thing
that I definitely wasn't in.
Yes, I want to share with you,
I brought this up.
Not cause me, me flaming racist,
but I was at a show with you at Westwood,
and they were like from Silicon Valley
and they brought you up thinking you were,
this was like you were on 'Silicon Valley'.
Okay. So let's go.
I was just trying to cancel myself for a second.
Later I was, later I was on 'Silicon Valley',
but that,
This was year one.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And this is what I've become now.
I just agree.
Just so you don't pull the rip cord.
You don't say, Oh no,
it's actually not made because
it's like, yeah,
if you don't,
if you're not going to do the work
and you're going to have
what I call white people blindness,
they just like a brown glasses done, done.
All you have to do is be like,
Hey, did you work on that thing?
That's truly all that you have to say.
Give yourself an out.
Don't be so sure.
Even, even when I introduced your credits at the beginning,
I was like, BoJack Gore's everything said
by the rising intonation.
I just feel like there is a, an agreement though,
amongst all people who get confused
for the other person,
where we just,
we are on our best behavior.
We just say yes we're on our best behavior.
And then we just.
Doesn't this give you kind of a license to be a huge dick?
Like you could, you could, if someone's like, Oh, okay.
Yeah, this is obviously Cal pen.
Then you're just like,
yeah man, working for the Obama administration was bullshit.
The guy's are fake man.
He would totally go to pizza restaurants all the time.
And then people like,
he's lost it.
It gives you this freedom.
Are you ever tempted?
You know what?
If I was really evil,
that would be the move
to take each and every other Indian actor in LA down.
And be like, are you, you worked in a,
you were in 'Lovebirds', right?
And I go, yeah.
But also, I love white supremacy.
When are we bringing that back?
Make sure to tell your friends.
And I definitely said that.
I met this guy, Moses Storm on the set of 'Lovebirds',
great way to plug myself as being in that movie.
And he opened my mind up about white people
and that, you know,
they're burning and they shouldn't be alive.
They shouldn't be outside.
And I really think they have a point.
Anyway, I'm going to this rally.
And honestly, you may not want to work
with me in the future,
but there's probably a guy out there with glasses
that you should probably definitely book.
It's so cool to see you getting these huge jobs
because I mean,
you and I have come up exactly at the same time.
I feel like where we've been on sets
that are just exactly as you're saying,
these indie things
where it's like a friend's favor,
the budget is like a tangerine and some goldfish.
We did a web series for 'Subway' together.
Oh my God!
That's a real thing that no one can find the record out
because they have pulled it
because Sharon from subway made a little appearance in,
this is before people understood branded content.
So with a certain large streaming network that I won't name,
where it was dipping their toes
and it was a subway sponsored,
very heavy handed, product placement slash show, sitcom.
That we all worked at a subway.
And, you were brought in.
I didn't know Jared made an appearance.
Yeah. Well, I was in it with him.
This is the thing I've been trying to track down.
So please, if anyone out there can find this,
I can't tell you the amount of money I would pay.
If there's got to be some record of it because there's,
You kept it on your reel.
Not the Jared part, but yeah, there is, there is like a,
he comes in.
There's like a funny interaction
and I can talk to him about his life.
I was like, so what's your life like?
Like what do you do?
And he goes,
it's pretty chill.
It's still these corporate events
and then nothing else.
But there's actual video of me doing
a behind the scenes thing.
And I'm like, you know, 21,
trying to get like just lucky to be there.
And I say about Jared is like,
it's so cool to see Jared,
because they've every subway you go
and you see the cardboard cutout of him, you know?
And now he's on the set.
He's essentially like the Brad Pitt of subway.
There's that pull quote from me.
Oh my God!
Can you imagine people don't realize how many things like,
that you have to do to get one thing
that you're okay with talking about in public.
Have you done commercials in the lockdown?
'Cause it's a little bit different process now.
Can I tell you something really.
So, whenever they're doing commercials in home, yes.
You're a hundred percent right.
Have I done any of them? No.
And part of the reason is because they're always like,
you know, yes,
they wanna shoot commercials
and they wanna shoot in your house.
But if your house doesn't look like a set,
they don't want to be involved with you.
So I have a lot of people who are like, Oh yeah,
we worked with Austin before.
He's great.
Let's definitely bring him on.
This is a commercial with DJ Cole, whoever, right?
Yeah.
And your house has to match DJ Khalid's house.
An impossible task.
You don't have a jet ski.
I don't have a jet ski.
I don't have marble.
And they're like, yeah.
So, DJ Khaled comes up and he goes, Hey, cool.
And you're supposed to be brushing your teeth.
And I'm like,
it's easy in my house.
Or is it supposed to be like,
is this supposed to look like his house?
And like, I don't know.
Sort of like in between.
And then you do the audition
and they're like, great,
that's super fun.
Now, can you give us a tour of your house?
And then you take your camera and you're like, okay.
And you're like showing them your house
and you can kind of sense the deflated.
Your house is bombing essentially.
It's like, you booked it,
but the house didn't book it.
Your sad apartment.
They're like, Oh,
the wealth inequality gap is too large
between you and DJ Khaled.
I'm like, I like, I like my place.
But I can just feel it.
I'm just like, well,
I guess we're just gonna have to find somebody else.
'Cause this guy is living in a tent it seems.
This will not work.
It seems to be living under a freeway,
trying to capture photos of Star Wars off chance.
Your apartment does look like Edward Norton's place
before he blows it up in fight club.
The same rug,
I'm a corporate machine.
I have a zigzag rug.
Everything from the Ikea catalog.
I eat noodles there every night
and I just wanna change my life.
I just wanna punch myself in the face.
It is a great out for us stuff.
You don't book something it's like,
they didn't like the place, you know.
I'm gonna keep using it.
Even when we can audition in person again.
They could sense the zigzag carpet.
They had it out for me.
They knew I had laid on that carpet panicking
about this audition.
This was so great talking to you.
I just miss talking to you
and seeing you around.
Likewise dude.
Maybe I'll just show up outside your window one
of these days.
Please do.
And I'm like, what?
Hasan Minhaj! It is great to see you.
So it's mandalorian people obviously know about that.
Marvel project is coming out.
Bunch of voiceover work.
Yeah. 'Devil may care' will be on NBC Sci-fi sometime
in the new year.
Very excited about it.
And then subway is doing some fantastic branded content
that you have to check out.
Please find this for us.
'Cause we did do a whole show about
the behind the scenes of this.
(indistinct) everyone.
I didn't see anybody. Bye.
Bye bye, is in the book.