- [Narrator] Have you ever been labeled as awkward,
or snobbish, but really you just feel tense around people?
If so, you may be shy and not really awkward.
While it's true that shyness and social awkwardness
may have characteristics that overlap,
there are some key differences that set them apart.
To learn more about this,
here are six signs you're shy, not socially awkward.
Number one.
You feel uncomfortable around strangers.
Do you tense up when you're in the presence of someone new?
Perhaps you clam up and find it hard to speak.
People who are shy often feel nervous
and uncomfortable around strangers.
While those who are socially awkward,
might also feel the same way,
they're not limited to feelings of discomfort,
as they may also have difficulty reading social cues.
For example, they may be outgoing
and have a lot of things to say,
but come off as a little weird, quirky, or even aloof.
Shy people on the other hand,
tend to be tense and awkward just at the start
and willing to gradually open up
and come out of their shell in time.
Number two.
You don't like unfamiliarity.
Is it nerve wracking for you to speak in front of a crowd,
for the first time,
or think about how your first day of school will be like?
People who are shy might not enjoy new environments
as they often find comfort, holed up in their rooms,
or in the company of people they already know.
They can be less open than outgoing people,
but deep inside they also recognize
the necessity of doing things despite their discomfort.
This aversion to unfamiliarity,
can also make them seem uninterested
or bored in new situations,
but don't be fooled, shy people aren't completely
against meeting new people, or venturing into new places.
They'd just rather dip their toes first into something new,
rather than jump straight into it.
Socially awkward people may also feel this way,
but not as much as those who are shy.
Number three.
Your parents are shy too.
Do you ever wonder if you've carried over the traits
of your biological parents?
Surprisingly, genetics may play a role
in whether you're shy or not.
According to a report published by
Nemour's Children's Health,
up to 20% of people have genes that dictate their shyness.
However, it's also important to note
that while your level of shyness
can be influenced by genetics,
it's also possible for some people to develop
a shy temperament, depending on their life experiences.
Number four.
You had negative past experiences.
Did you go through a life defining experience in the past,
that changed who you are?
It's possible that your negative experiences
in the past have led you to become shy.
Maybe you were always the new kid at school
and had trouble making friends,
or maybe you had a friend that betrayed you
and so are more cautious in finding genuine connections.
The source of your shyness may not even necessarily
stem from one event, but a culmination of many small events.
On the other hand,
while social awkwardness can also stem
from past experiences, it tends to manifest differently.
Instead of remaining reserved and quiet, like shy people
socially awkward individuals may do other things
like overshare in a discussion,
or overreact inappropriately.
Number five.
With friends you can be the life of the party.
Being shy doesn't mean you can't have fun with your friends.
In fact, when you're around people you know well,
you might be a natural conversationalist
and can go on chatting for hours.
In contrast, people with social awkwardness
tend to act the same way around all people,
regardless of how well they know them.
They may not find it difficult to chat
with a friend who they already know,
but they may bring up topics
that would strike others as strange,
or not know when to end a conversation.
And number six.
You're selective with who you let into your life.
Does it take a while for you to warm up to someone?
It's not that shy people don't wanna make friends,
it's just that they're more selective
with who they let into their lives.
Shy individuals are often very choosy
about the people they talk to
and the situations they put themselves in.
They like to take their time in getting to know a person
before completely opening up to them.
Socially awkward people on the other hand,
don't necessarily follow the same rules.
They may talk to people indiscriminately,
or be friends with everyone they meet.
So, which one do you relate to the most?
Are you socially awkward, or just shy?
Let us know in the comments below.
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The references and studies used in this video,
are added in the description below.
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