Jon Bernie: Let's just say that we live in environment that has infinite choices. Infinite
ways to entertain ourselves, perhaps. Right? There's so many -- you can go on the internet
and you could disappear into all the choices. Right? And so, I think that this ... when
I speak about the relationship between what might be called compulsive activity, compulsive
behavior and how does that relate to the process of becoming conscious. Well, it's very connected
and important. The reason is that when we start to become conscious, when we start to
discover that there is awareness, so to speak, which is another way of describing awakened
consciousness (awareness) that what we find is that there is often these gravitational
pulls towards certain things and away from certain things. Right? So, we're trying to
get something, trying to get rid of something, trying to understand something. And those
3 dynamics are the 3 main ways that we struggle with reality. Ok? And, if we're not conscious
of those, then I would say those are compulsive behaviors.
But once we become conscious of them, then just by bringing awareness to those dynamics,
the space begins to open up, the space into awareness begins to open up. And that can
be a very bumpy ride. It can be very painful and difficult. And often people need support
through that process, to allow it to fully gestate, to fully open up. Ok?
So, people often have a little emotional release, have a little consciousness arising, but then
the contraction of protection and defense kicks back in. So, in an environment like
satsang, where there is teaching going on, when there is that mirroring of presence,
it holds the space for allowing a full discharge, or full opening into awareness. And all manner
of struggle can all of a sudden disappear.
And usually people find themselves in a very different state of mind, a very different
state of body, a very different, kind of ... there can really be a profound shift at that point.
And the reason for that is that there is a force field, a kind of gravitational force
field of the compulsion that all of a sudden becomes conscious.
We're not doing it. See, this is the tricky part. We're not in control of this. It's more
that we learn how to give attention to what's really happening. You know? Because the movement
... what compels us is unfelt emotion. And when emotion can be fully felt without action,
when that can actually discharge, then we're in equanimity, the we can have intuition,
and yes, we can go have dinner at a restaurant somewhere. You know what I mean? Then it isn't
like ... you're not thrown into it, you're not like gravitationally thrown into it. It's
more that it is clear that this is ... "oh, now this." So, there is the end of that compulsion.
This idea of embracing ... I don't know if I'd say embracing compulsivity, but I would
certainly say to begin to realize that it is very much a part of the process of transformation.
Often people want to get rid of the difficult experiences. They want to avoid the so-called
compulsive, the addictive. They want to judge it, get rid of it, stop it, you know, willpower
themselves not to do it. Right? And actually, what's really is important is to really let
it be. Not necessarily, but to really acknowledge it. To tell the truth about it. That's what
I often talk about is the most important element is being able to tell the truth, to fully
disclose the condition. And in that, freedom is possible.
So, embracing compulsivity would be to really be able to have that awareness ... allow that.
And that is really what cultivates what I would call compassion and big heart. And unconditional
love really. And compassion for our human conditioning which is not conscious.
No, people are beating themselves up for what, really, they're not doing consciously at all.
It's not operating from a conscious place.
So, once we can see that, "Oh, there it goes again." You know, whatever that behavior is,
or those thought patterns, or those emotional movements, then we begin to see it from a
bigger perspective. We begin to see it from this vastness that we are. And, as we see
it from that, then it can return, it can begin to unwind, and literally re-energize and expand
that space of awareness. So, it actually facilitates the process of transformation.
It's another ... I'm thinking of Suzuki Roshi again, he used to say, you know, you can take
the weeds out of the ... that are growing around the plant, you pull them out and then
you stick them back in and it nourishes the soil. That's what it means.
So, everything is energetic; everything is fundamentally energy. And, that's why I like
to talk about this in terms of what I call energy management. And to take away the, sort
of, definition of spiritual practice. That seems like a very old way of thinking and
has a lot of ... people have lots and lots of projections onto that. And speak about
it much more, kind of, practically. Energy management. So that emotion and compulsivity
and all these human difficulties are just energies that are trying to find balance,
to really find the movement that they need to have. And our defense mechanisms literally
stop those movements from happening. And so, we've learned how to block the flow of energy.
Literally. So we have to re-learn how to allow that. And in an environment where we can be
safe, because it can be very unsettling, very destabilizing. People can have kriyas, they
can have intense emotional release, they can have laughter. You've seen it. We have all
of it in satsang. Where people have all kinds of ... all manner of change. Right?