>> STEPHEN: MY NEXT GUEST IS A BRILLIANT COMEDIAN WHO IS
PERFORMING SATURDAY AT CARNEGIE HALL FOR THE NEW YORK COMEDY
FESTIVAL.
PLEASE WELCOME TIG NOTARO.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) ♪
>> Stephen: WELCOME TO THE SHOW.
>> THANKS FOR HAVING ME.
>> Stephen: NICE TO MEET YOU.
NICE TO MEET YOU.
>> Stephen: WE'VE NEVER MET BEFORE.
>> I KNOW THIS.
>> Stephen: I KNEW THAT, TOO, BUT I WANTED TO MEET YOU BECAUSE
I ADMIRE YOUR WORK.
>> I LOVE YOU.
>> Stephen: OH!
BECAUSE I LIKE YOU?
>> YES.
>> Stephen: BECAUSE I USUALLY LIKE PEOPLE.
I'M AN EASY DATE.
>> EVERYBODY LOVES YOU.
>> Stephen: OH, THAT'S VERY NICE OF YOU TO SAY.
WE HAVE ONE THING IN COMMON, WE'RE BOTH COMEDIANS FROM THE
SOUTH.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE FROM MISSISSIPPI AND TEXAS?
>> I'D SAY EXACTLY THAT.
>> Stephen: MISSISSIPPI AND TEXAS?
>> BORN IN MISSISSIPPI, LIVED THERE, THEN WE MOVED TO TEXAS.
>> Stephen: LITTLE TOWN, MISSISSIPPI?
MOST TOWNS IN MISSISSIPPI ARE -- >> THERE ARE ONLY LITTLE TOWNS.
>> Stephen: WHAT TOWN IN MISSISSIPPI?
>> I WAS BORN IN JACKSON AND WE MOVED TO THE GULF COAST.
THERE'S PROBABLY 4,000 PEOPLE.
>> Stephen: BUT YOU DON'T HAVE A SOUTHERN ACCENT.
PEOPLE ASK ME ALL THE TIME WHY DON'T I HAVE ONE.
WHY DON'T YOU HAVE ONE?
>> WELL, I'M NOT SURE, BUT I -- I DO SAY A FEW WORDS THAT ARE
SOUTHERN LIKE WUDDNIN', OH, I -- WUDDIN' GONNA DO THAT.
THEN I WOULD SAY Y'ALL.
I HAD A PODCAST -- >> Stephen: I DIDN'T REALIZE I
WAS IN THE PRESENCE OF A PODCASTER.
>> YOU HAVE YOUR POD, I HAVE MINE.
BUT I SAID, CAREFUL YOU DON'T WANT TO TUMP THAT OVER.
EVERYBODY STOPPED AND SAID, I'M SORRY, WHAT?
I SAID TUMP.
JUST BE CAREFUL, YOU DON'T WANT TO TUMP IT OVER.
IN THAT MOMENT, I FOUND OUT THAT TUMP WAS NOT A WORD.
>> Stephen: IT'S UNREGIONABLISM OR --
>> SOUTHERN DIALECT, BUT I HAD JUST BEEN DROPPING "TUMP" ALL
AROUND, AND I FOUND OUT ON THE AIR IN FRONT OF HUNDREDS OF
LISTENERS THAT THAT WAS -- THAT THAT WUDDN-T A WORD.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: PEOPLE THEY,
Y'ALL, THAT MEANS A WHOLE GROUP OF PEOPLE IN THE SOUTH.
NO, THAT'S ALL Y'ALL.
THERE'S Y'ALL, THEN THERE'S ALL Y'ALL, WHICH IS THE COLLECTIVE
MULTIPLE.
>> EXACTLY.
>> Stephen: I CAN CALL YOU AND SAY, ARE Y'ALL GOING?
YEAH.
WHAT ABOUT ALL Y'ALL?
NO, NO.
( LAUGHTER ) >> EXACTLY.
YOU'RE FROM NORTH CAROLINA?
>> Stephen: I FORGIVE YOU.
I'M FROM SOUTH CAROLINA.
YEAH, YEAH.
>> YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW MY TOWN.
>> Stephen: I KNOW JACKSON.
BUT YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN WHERE I WAS FROM.
>> Stephen: I APOLOGIZE.
THAT'S ALL RIGHT.
WE WORK THINGS THROUGH QUICKLY.
>> Stephen: THIS IS AWKWARD.
WELL, NEITHER OF US ENJOY AWKWARDNESS SO LET'S GET OUT OF
THIS MOMENT IMMEDIATELY.
( LAUGHTER ) OOH, BOY!
>> Stephen: YOU ARE A NEW MOTHER.
>> I AM.
>> Stephen: SPEAKING OF AWKWARD.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: YOU HAVE TWINS.
I DO.
( APPLAUSE ) >> I'LL BE HONEST, I LOVE THEM
SO MUCH.
( LAUGHTER ) AND THAT WAS NOT HALLOWEEN.
>> Stephen: NOW, I HEARD SOMETHING ABOUT YOU FROM MY
PRODUCER, NOT YOUR HOMETOWN, EVIDENTLY, BUT I DID HEAR THAT
YOU LIKE TO RIDE MOTORCYCLES BUT YOUR WIFE SAID THAT IS
ABSOLUTELY OFF LIMITS NOW.
>> YES.
WHEN WE STARTED DATING, I HAVE TWO VINTAGE MOTORCYCLES THAT ARE
COLLECTING DUST.
>> AND SHE WON'T LET YOU RIDE THEM ANYMORE?
>> Stephen: YES.
ARE YOU ABOUT TO SURPRISE ME WITH A NEW MOTORCYCLE?
>> Stephen: NO.
( LAUGHTER ) GOD, I WISH WHAT WAS THE CASE.
NO!
SO WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO RIDE IF YOU CAN'T RIDE YOUR
MOTORCYCLES, BABE?
YEAH.
COME ON, YOU JUST NEED TO TALK TO HER AND GO, LOOK, THIS IS MY
LIFE.
>> OH, I THOUGHT YOU WERE CALLING ME BABE.
I WAS, LIKE, DUDE, I'M MARRIED!
YOU CAN'T BE CALLING ME BABE.
>> Stephen: IT'S SHOW BUSINESS.
CAN'T I CALL ANYBODY BABE?
WHAT'S UP, BABY DOLL?
( LAUGHTER ) YOU JUST TOUCHED MY HAND.
I'M A MARRIED MAN.
ALL RIGHT?
I'M FLATTERED.
>> I AM ATTRACTED TO YOU AND I CAN'T HELP MYSELF.
>> Stephen: THE FEELING IS MUTUAL.
( LAUGHTER ) SO WHAT DOES SHE WANT ME TO
DRIVE.
>> SHE DUDN' T.
>> Stephen: SHE MIGHT COULD?
HE MIGHT COULD.
( LAUGHTER ) SHE DOESN'T WANT ME TO DRIVE
MOTORCYCLES OR MY DREAM CAR WHICH IS A HONDA ODYSSEY.
( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: YOU WOULD THINK
YOU COULD HAVE A HONDA ODYSSEY OUT HERE.
THAT'S A SUPER SEXY CAR, THAT MINIVAN.
>> I WOULD DRIVE THAT PODIUM.
>> Stephen: THAT IS ACTUALLY STREET LEGAL.
HE DRIVES THAT HOME EVERY DAY.
>> I COULD PUT MAX AND FINN ON TOP AND PRAY THEY DON'T TUMP.
>> Stephen: WHAT IS IT YOU LOVE ABOUT THE HONDA ODYSSEY
BECAUSE IT'S A SWEET RIDE.
>> IT HAS A VACUUM CLEANER IN THERE.
>> Stephen: WHY DO YOU NEED THE VACUUM CLEANER?
>> CHEERIOS, GOLDFISH.
>> Stephen: TO CLEAN OUT THE CAR BECAUSE TO HAVE THE KIDS.
DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S VERY EASY TO CLEAN OUT?
MOTORCYCLE.
STRAP THE KIDS ON THE BACK OF THAT MOTORCYCLE?
>> NO, IN A SIDE CAR.
>> Stephen: OKAY.
A LITTLE SCHAV BLOWING IN THE WIND.
>> Stephen: YOU'RE PERFORMING AT CARNEGIE HALL SATURDAY.
>> YES.
>> Stephen: FIRST TIME YOU'VE PLAYED CARNEGIE HALL?
>> CAN'T YOU TELL?
>> Stephen: CONGRATULATIONS.
HAVE A GREAT TIME.
>> THANK YOU.
>> Stephen: LOVELY TO MEET YOU.
>> YOU, TOO.
>> STEPHEN: TIG IS PERFORMING IN THE NEW YORK COMEDY FESTIVAL AT
CARNEGIE HALL THIS SATURDAY.
YOU CAN STREAM HER SHOW "ONE MISSISSIPPI" ON AMAZON NOW.
TIG NOTARO, EVERYBODY!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH RON SUSKIND.