sex education in porn, i'm dr. trish leigh, cognitive neuroscientist and sex addiction
recovery coach let's talk about the use of porn for sex education and what porn really does to
your sexual attitudes your sexual beliefs and the reality about sex okay so we know from the science
that when you consume pornography and especially if you started at a young age what porn teaches
you is that what you see in the scenes in the pornography that you watch you begin to think
those are real and it changes your attitudes about sex it increases sexual aggression and
it changes your sexual arousal template the things that you think you like about sex
so this is how i liken it have you ever watched one of those cooking shows where
there's three you know amateur bakers and they're coming to this show to all bake the cake and
the least worst one is the winner so you're not watching gordon ramsay you're not watching hell's
kitchen here where you have a master chef who's cooking you're watching people who are creating
a distorted version of that cake none of them are the best version that's what porn is like
and we know this from the science that the acts that you see even in the most vanilla of
porn are not acts that healthy people want in their sex life so when you watch it and especially
if you're watching anything with intensity you now think this is what good sex is like
and it takes on this performance aspect of it so you start to see sex as a performance because
you're watching it as a performance instead of experiencing it as an experience
so this really distorts your beliefs and your attitudes about sex and you don't even know that
it's distorting your beliefs that's the the most insidious thing about this is that it's warping
your entire thought system around sex without you even knowing and especially if it started
when you were young in your teenage years you just grow up thinking that these intense performances
where a woman likes everything even though they're violent and they would actually hurt
and they go on way too long and you are just there performing and it's it's a manly thing
that is not a healthy representation of sex and that actually is the vanilla stuff so you you
glean that this is what is good at the same time you are becoming aroused by the things that you
see so we know that this is how fetishes start for people and not really start it's how fetishes
continue for people many times fetishes come from something in their past where arousal gets linked
to something that they were exposed to and then they will seek it out in specific genres but i
digress but the point is that what you watch your brain is becoming coupled to and what that means
is you will need more of that same thing and then you will try to have that thing show up in your
life and it terrifies people people go dark side and they really become freaked out by the thoughts
that they're consistent frequent and intense porn use gives them the fantasies that they have
there's many men that are struggling with same-sex attraction right now because they are watching
men in a heightened arousal sexually aroused state your brain is being linked neurochemically to what
you are viewing on the screen that is not healthy sex education healthy sex education is figuring
out what you like sexually which would be really difficult if you've watched lots of lots of porn
it would be difficult to know what you actually like because of the neurochemical responses
because your brain's been wired and trained based upon what you've been watching and so then what
happens is you need to go figure it out and if you were never exposed to porn you would be able
to figure that out in a healthy way so it can be difficult to establish healthy sexuality after
hypersexuality in a porn habit but that's the role that's the job of recovery is figuring it out when
you come out of the screen but the point of this video is porn is not healthy sex education it's
teaching you all the wrong stuff it's teaching you how to bake a terrible cake that no one is going
to want to eat in the real actual world what i want for you is for you to come out of the screen
figure out how to bake an amazing cake in the bedroom find somebody who wants to eat that
cake with you okay i hope that helps you out and if you're looking for help on this journey
drtrishleigh.com if you're inspired to donate to help the next generation
stay out of porn pornbrainprevention.org and as always control your brain or it'll control you