Oh, hello!
Do you have a warrant to be here?
Maybe there's a little bit of...
a little grass growing right along here.
Just some happy little things.
I love you.
You love me.
We all own our own bodies.
So marry who you want,
and do whatever drugs you choose.
And when it's time,
you can die with dignity by determining
your own end of life plan.
Hi Maria!
Hi Officer Winkles!
How're you doing today?
I don't have to answer that question.
That is correct.
I'm recording you!
Am I being detained?
Nope.
Which I can legally do, because I'm in a public place!
Come back if you have a warrant.
Alrighty.
Know your rights.
Yay!
Okay Gumshoes, Carmen Sandiego is in a country
where socialism failed.
That narrows it down to Venezuela, Cuba,
the former Soviet Union, Moldova, Laos,
Vietnam, Albania, Angola—
So we did some digging into your past.
The suspense is killing me!
But we still haven't solved the case Holmes!
Why is marijuana a schedule one drug?
Elementary, my dear Watson.
Nixon and racism.
What?
You okay?
I don't know.
Hey man, it's alright.
It's alright.
We've got qualified immunity.
Qualified immunity!
It's not for you, it's just for me.
I shot your dog.
I shot your wife.
I get to go on with my life.
My favorite part is where the character says,
I do not want green eggs and ham.
And then Sam I Am says,
That's fine, you don't have to eat them. That's your right.
The end.
It's a short book.
Here we see one of the last taxi cab monopolies
struggling for life.
Competitors have entered their ecosystem.
Do you know what eminent domain abuse is?
It's when the government decides the neighborhood of
make-believe is better used by a Taiwanese LCD manufacturer.
Today we have a real Senator.
Hello Senator!
How are you doing?
What is your favorite color?
I would have to say blue.
Me too!
Tell me, why did you sell all your stock
right before the crash?
Um...
I mean it's literally just the tragedy of the commons, but they made it cute?
And that sound means we're in international waters,
I'm gonna marry a robot and sell my kidney on eBay.
My dearest Rowena,
today the district attorney filed criminal charges
against a two door sedan.
Carmen Sandiego is hiding in a country
that contains an American military base.
Is she in...
Australia, Bahrain, Belgium, Brazil, Bulgaria,
British Indian Ocean Territory,
Cuba, Germany, Djibouti--
Clifford the big red—
menace.
Circle.
Square.
Rectangle.
War factory.
All right Jack, where is your gay wedding cake?
I refuse to bake a gay wedding cake,
and you can't force me to.
It's my right.
That is your right.
But it is my right to kick you off of this show.
Please leave.
Yup.
You homophobic bearded meat goblin.
I just want enough to warm it up some.
I don't want to set it on fire.
It's a very easy to set it on fire.
Well today on This Old House,
we're at the city zoning office,
because they think our new porch
is two inches too close to the sidewalk.
Which is (beep) bull (beep),
because their sidewalk is too far away from the street.
Which they'd know about if they'd read any of the e-mails
I'd sent them over the past 18 months.
So join us, as we waste our whole (beep) day on this (beep).
The premier of Thomas the High Speed Rail
has been delayed.
Again.
And at the ten bitcoin level,
you receive a handsome tote bag.
Quack!
Good one!
Quiet.
Very good.
Queen.
What else starts with the letter Q?
Space lasers.
Oh, uh.
John Podesta and Hilary Clinton
had an email exchange about hot dogs.
Where do we get these puppets?
It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood
and you have a right to defend your house with firearms.
With firearms.