-Our first guest tonight
is an Oscar and Emmy Award-winning actress
you know from films such as "Marriage Story"
and "Jurassic Park" and shows like
"Big Little Lies" and "Enlightened."
She is also the coauthor of the new book
"Honey, Baby, Mine: A Mother and Daughter Talk
Life, Death, Love and Banana Pudding,"
which is now available everywhere.
Please welcome back to the show Laura Dern, everybody.
♪♪ [ Cheers and applause ]
♪♪
Welcome back. -Hi, everybody.
[ Cheers and applause continue ]
-I always genuinely love talking to you.
And what I love about this book
is I feel like I'm talking with you when you read it
because this is a conversation between you and your mother.
And this is the kind of conversation, I guess,
that you guys had never had together before.
What was the sort of catalyst to approaching
having these conversations together?
-So my amazing mother, Diane Ladd,
who is such an extraordinary actor and been,
you know, the light of my life, got a health diagnosis.
She unknowingly -- In her neighborhood
were surrounding farms and they were using pesticides
and spraying without notification.
And when she discovered there was this lung disease
from scarring from the pesticide exposure,
they said "your mom likely has 3 to 6 months to live"
and there was no medicine or support,
so they said, so they hoped that by walking
she might get more strength and expand her lungs.
And so she really didn't want to do this.
Let's be clear, she said, "I hate walking.
I had to walk 10 miles to school when I was little.
Don't make me walk more."
And at the time she was on oxygen.
It was very difficult, and she loves telling stories.
So I said, "I'll tell you what, we're going to walk each day
a little bit further and we're going to talk
and I'm going to record it in my phone,
and your grandchildren will have it."
And as my mother says, you know,
when you think you're going to go,
you tell each other everything.
But the gift of the experience was we discovered,
as close as we are,
and we're actors who've worked together on films --
she was also in "Enlightened" with me
and David Lynch's "Wild at Heart" and "Rambling Rose" --
we had spoken about so little.
We had skirted from the deepest
and most heartbreaking of moments in our life,
and I never asked her things like,
"What's the first movie you ever saw?
Why did you want to become an actor?"
And this was the discovery of an intimacy
we don't share enough with our closest of loved ones.
-And then the real happy ending as well is health-wise.
She's okay?
-Also, to quote my mom,
this occurred at the beginning of 2019,
and she will tell you, "Four years later,
I've done two movies, a TV show and wrote a book."
So...
[ Cheers and applause ]
But she does believe that the walking did in fact
give her more energy and that the talking and the healing
and us loving each other was a major healing
and that she didn't believe doctors.
She was like, "They're 'practicing' medicine, Laura."
[ Laughter ]
So she's like, "I'm going to get several other opinions."
And she believes in alternative options
and worked very hard to be here.
-Well, I'm so happy she's here.
One thing that must have been very surreal
is, so, you record her on these walks
and then obviously you transcribe it into a book
and then -- which is a great idea, obviously,
because you have a couple of actors
who have written a book, you record the audiobook,
so now you're back in the booth,
basically rerecording a conversation you've already had.
Were there ever times where you thought,
"Oh, now that I'm getting another chance at this story,
I'd love to..." [ Laughter ]
-Yes. I mean, you had two actresses,
so it felt like doing a one-act play or something,
but it was so personal.
And in the moment we were sharing everything.
And the only reason we ended up doing this
was, as we started sharing our story,
it was inspiring
friends, my children, people, all different relationships
to communicate more empathically and knowing
that you don't necessarily solve anything or agree,
but you ask the questions and you hear each other.
But once we were in there and we heard some of the responses,
there is a story about my mother taking my son for a haircut
when I was out of town, and I'm still livid.
And we did the audio recording and at the end of it I was like,
"You are so wrong. I can't believe you did that."
And we got in a huge fight. We needed to take five, guys.
-It must be interesting because the first time
you're listening, you're thinking,
"Well, she's only going to be around for another three months"
and now she's fine.
You're like, "I got a -- I have a different answer."
[ Laughter ] -That's what she says.
She was like, "Wait a minute.
Why did I go through that whole story with her?"
-You know, one of the things -- You guys, your first film
was a film your mother was in, and Martin Scorsese directed it.
And an interesting thing is your mom talks
about how she had anxiety when you told her
that you wanted to share the same profession that she had.
And it's funny because I had nothing,
you know, I shouldn't say nothing.
I had a lot of anxiety in my career.
I've had so much more joy than anxiety.
But if my kids said they wanted to do it,
I would have the same thing.
Weirdly, I would think about the downside more than the upside.
-Yeah. -Was that the first time
she had shared with you that she was worried when you said
you wanted this path? -I mean,
at the very beginning she was very reticent.
But I was a kid. I mean, I did the, you know,
played an extra in my mom's movie,
"Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore" with Scorsese.
And I was a 7-year-old.
But I fell in love with this, for me, incredible team sport.
It was the first time I had sort of seen a team sport at work.
150 people come together to make one thing,
as you all well know, on this incredible show.
You know, it feels so good when it works, right?
It doesn't always. But anyway. [ Laughter ]
But this always works.
-Of course. -So anyway, just so we're clear.
-We keep thinking we're going to have a night
where something falls flat. But yeah, not yet.
-No, no, but it's, you know,
it's so invigorating and she saw my passion.
But as you said, she also saw the pitfalls,
especially as a young girl of entering an industry
where she couldn't always be protective of me.
So she tried to talk me out of it, but it didn't work.
-And there's a lovely story about, as an 11-year-old,
you took steps to further your own career at a party.
-[ Laughs ] Yes, it's so ridiculous.
But it is true that I was 11 at my mom's friend,
the actor Bo Hopkins' house.
And I went up to an agent and I said,
"My mom won't help me and I want to be an actor.
Will you let me audition for you?"
[ Laughter ]
-It's the most Hollywood thing
to bring your kid to a party and be like,
"Now, don't -- If I catch you talking to agents..."
-Yeah, stay away from the agents.
-I have a lot more questions.
We will be right back with more from Laura Dern.