*Phone ringing*
Mom: Hi Honey, it's Mom.
Son: Hey Mom..
Son: I obviously know it's you, you don't have to introduce yourself every time.
Mom: How've you been?
Good Son: Fine, everything's good.
Real Son: Well my girlfriend dumped me and I'm hungover but I'd rather not talk about that with you.
Good Son: So what's been going on with you? How are things?
Real Son: So I'm going to act like I'm interested in what you're doing even though I couldn't care less.
Mom: Oh, I've been really busy! Good Son: Oh, Yea? Doing what?
Real Son: Can you keep talking for a few seconds so I don't have to answer anymore questions?
Mom: Well we hosted a dinner party and played some Mahjong, even Jean came over-You remember Jean?
Good Son: Yes. Real Son: Nope!
Mom: Her daughter is getting married this Summer - The pretty one, you remember her?
Good Son: Yea, her name is Emma right?
Real Son: Emma freaking McLain, man she was so hot!
Good Son: Hey Mom you know what, I gotta run.
Real Son: Hey Mom, I have nowhere else to be but I really want to get off the phone right now.
Mom: Wait! I need to talk to you about something.
Good Son: Sure, What's up?
Real Son: Oh, Shit did you finally find out about that thing?
Mom: Have you talked to your sister recently?
Good Son: A few day ago, why?
Real Son: If talking means texted, then yes.
Mom: Well she's been out of college for a year and we have no idea what she's doing. Has she told you anything?
Good Son: I don't know Mom, ask her.
Real Son: She told me not to tell you, you know that.
Mom: I just don't want her to end up having problems with her finances. You know, like you did.
Good Son: I'm fine mom.
Real Son: We're not talking about this again.
Mom: So, you got your health insurance, right?
Good Son: Yea... Real Son: And there it is, the actual reason why you called.
Mom: Seriously, you need it. What if you got hurt?
Good Son: Mhmmm.. Real Son: I'll agree with anything you say just to change the topic.
Mom: Do you know how much you have to pay for an ambulance these days?
Good Son: Right... Real Son: Mom, just so you know I'm checking out of the conversation right... Now!
Mom: You need to be going to a doctor at least 4 times a year. Good Son: Ok.
Real Son: Why are we still doing this when you know I'm not listening?
Mom: Good, All we want is for you to be safe and happy. Good Son: I know Mom...
Real Son: I'm tuning back in, you're about to say something sentimental.
Mom: I love you! Both Sons: I love you too.
Mom: Ok talk to you soon.
*Fast-paced String orchestra*