Please welcome Dan Reynolds.
(cheering and applause)
-Welcome. -Thank you.
Uh, first of all, congratulations.
Last night you played Madison Square Garden.
-Yeah. -Are you still coming off of that buzz?
Yeah?
Is that, like, one of those buzzes
that just never goes away, or do you...
You're just like, "Yeah, on to the next one."
No, I think it was something I've dreamt about
-since I was really little. -Yeah.
And my mom and dad came out and...
So, it was, uh, it was nerve-racking,
but it was also a moment that I think was a little surreal,
where I thought, "Okay, I think we've done something."
-You know? Yeah. -I think you've done something.
-I think you've done more than something, man. -Oh.
-Congratulations on that. Um... -Thank you.
(cheering and applause)
And-and congratulations
on this documentary that's coming out.
This-this is a really insightful story
that you've chosen to tell:
the story of the Mormon Church
and how they've dealt with the LGBT community.
This is a really powerful story.
Why did you choose to tell it?
So, I grew up Mormon. Super conservative family.
Eight boys, one girl.
Um, in middle school,
one of the first friends I made was gay and Mormon.
And I saw...
It was the first time that I really felt
like what I was being taught at church
-didn't sit right in my heart. -Right.
Um, and I watched the conflict that he had every single day.
Um, not just bullying at school,
but also just feeling like he couldn't come out.
He'd go to dances with girls.
We wouldn't even talk about it because it was so...
he felt so much shame.
Um, so, flash forward.
(clears throat) High school.
Had a lot of friends. Lost two to suicide.
Um, went to BYU.
Got kicked out of BYU myself
for having sex with my girlfriend,
which was a shaming experience for me.
-I felt so much... It was the first time -Right.
that I really spiraled into this place of depression.
That, on a very small scale, is what our LGBTQ youth feel
every single day in orthodox religion, which is,
they are told something that is beautiful,
something that should be celebrated--
their sexuality, which is unchangeable--
is sinful, and that they should feel bad about it.
And then we expect them
to have healthy lives, and they don't.
-They have high suicide rates. -Right.
They have high depression, anxiety.
Um, so religious guilt is so prevalent in their lives.
You look at Utah right now.
It has one of the highest suicide rates
in the nation, very Mormon.
Um, and LGBTQ youth are eight times more likely
to take their life when not accepted
in their home or community.
So, it kind of... I don't know.
-I just feel like enough is enough. -Right.
And I've been put in this position as a Mormon
who is famous, and there's not many of us.
It's, like, Donnie and Marie.
-You know? -(laughter)
So, I don't know. I just feel like I hope
that I can at least start a conversation.
I think you... I think you really have. I, um...
(applause and cheering)
I think you've started more than a conversation.
I think you've started a movement,
because, you know, not just the documentary,
but LoveLoud is a festival that you kicked off in Utah.
A festival where you came out playing music,
bring people together, uh, and as the name suggests,
LoveLoud was about being proud, and it's one of...
One of my favorite moments in the documentary is
when you come up with that name.
How did you come up with it, and why was it so inspiring
for you to use that title?
You know, I think that most people
that I talk to who are religious--
Mormons, Catholic, whatever it is--
and who are conflicted about this...
They say, "You know what? I love our LGBTQ youth.
I love them."
But there's always this little dagger
behind the back of...
You know, "I love you, but..."
-Right. -"I love you if..."
You know? And so, it's not real love.
It's an empty word. It doesn't...
To our youth that I have spoken with--
they said, "You know what? I would rather you say
"you don't love me, you don't accept me
"than open this door and say,
"'Look at the bright light inside. Come inside,'
-but there's tacks all over the ground." -Right.
It's not healthy for you.
Um, and so, LoveLoud is about talking about
what does it mean to truly love and accept?
It means that you say to your child
"You are perfect the way you are," and-and...
(applause and cheering)
And I think that
until that happens,
we're gonna continue to see...
The suicide rate has quadrupled
in Utah over the last six years.
And people say, "Well, it's the altitude."
The altitude's not quadrupling.
-(laughter) -You know?
And so, it's just... it's... it's frustrating to me,
and I get so fired up about it, 'cause I've spent this last year
-meeting with all these parents... -Right.
...who have lost their children to suicide
because of religious guilt.
And I love, I love my faith.
I love Mormons.
I think Mormons are generally good people.
The amount of bigots is very small.
But the amount of people who just kind of turn their head
-and say "This doesn't affect me" is large. -That is a...
that is a difficult decision and a conversation to have.
I mean, I know I grew up in a very religious household,
uh, you know, not dissimilar but not the same as Mormonism.
But it is a difficult conversation
to have with yourself,
where you have to ask
where the "limits" of the religion end
and where your compassion begins,
going beyond what you've been taught.
When you look at Mormonism as it stands,
do you think that the church is in a position to pivot?
Or do you think it's a bit naive for people to say,
"I want to be Mormon and a member of the LGBTQ community"?
That's a really good question.
I think, to begin with,
most people from the outside would just say,
"Dan, this is easy.
"Leave Mormonism.
-Tell all these kids to leave Mormonism." -Right.
It's not that simple.
Because you could be could... putting a kid
in a absolute more at risk situation by saying
leave your family or leave this religion
that they might believe in.
-Right. -It might be their whole foundation.
So you can't just drag them out of the religion.
So, until they're old enough to make that decision
and they're in a safe space to do that if they want to,
you just need to make it a better place for them.
-Right. -The leaders aren't gonna change.
I hope they change, but I can't speak for them.
I don't know that the doctrine's ever gonna change.
But if it never changes,
then we must change the people.
We must change the culture within religion so that...
You know, it's like... I asked a-a parent this the other day
who's very conservative and Mormon.
I said, "I know you believe this,
"but let me just say this statistic.
"If your child comes to you and says,
"'Mom, I am gay,'
"in that moment, if you don't say,
"'I accept you and love you
"'and that's beautiful and it's wonderful,'
"if you don't say that,
"they're not accepted in the home or household,
they're eight times more likely to commit suicide."
So with that statistic,
do you s... At that moment,
the parent has to accept them,
even if the religion's there,
the Bible, all those things they believe in.
But are you gonna put your child eight times more at risk
because of that?
And I hope the answer's no.
Regardless of what your faith is,
regardless of what your belief is,
the data is just there.
And it's overwhelming.
So I think we just don't have a choice.
-We don't have a choice, and... -(cheering and applause)
I will honestly say, um, this documentary
is one of the most eye-opening exposés I've ever seen.
It's done with heart, it's done with compassion.
-Thank you so much for being on the show. -Thanks for having me.
An honor to have you here.
Believer airs on HBO June 25.
An amazing man. Dan Reynolds, everybody.