hello, hello
my name is Markiplier
how's it going guys I'm Chad wild clay
and whatever you do don't leave a
comment below until after the video
otherwise you might end up looking like
a fool again
what's this roast markiplier roast
markiplier why would I roast markiplier
I mean that guy is awesome
he's never done anything bad to me like
that punk PewDiePie this fucking guy got
nine million muse of this trend now the
real cringe begins and pineapple apple
pen. Ugghh he put himself in there
this kind of shit makes me want to die
what the heck's going on with my computer?
stop stop! What the heck! Why do you guys
want me to roast markiplier so bad?
do you know something I don't huh let's
go ask Vy. Wait who is she talking to?
hello Vy! Hi mark is my hair looking
fabulous
it sure is Vy!. Yeah it is! Thanks Mark
it's no big deal. i like only spent like five
minutes on it. yeah it's nice to finally
see you even if it is just a video yeah
I wish we could have gotten dinner or
something
Oh dinner ya did it sounds great when
you want to get together and do that
whoa we're on our barely first date over
here this could turn into love after all
Vy's on a date with Markiplier?
Goodbye Vy...
that didn't even hurt! Oh my gosh!
ow! Ow! My ankle! Owee owee ow! Oh it hurts so bad!
I gotta call 911 oh my gosh
hello everybody hello everybody hello
everybody my name is....Markiplier
Hello everybody my name is markiplier and
welcome to let's play...fu...
hello? yeah how's it going man? i just got hit
by a car man
oh shoot that was you I i hit oh dude
I'm so sorry man I was so distracted
dude you know what I always say man kids
in the backseat cause accidents and
accidents in the backseat cause kids ahahaha
you are filled with such wisdom
yeah and speaking of kids when are you
end up being a kid not anytime soon man
I just caught her dating freaking
markiplier what do what you come on you
got to try to get her back
I'm supposed to do that man you know a
woman can resist a man with such a huge
colassal subscriber count! It's like i
always said, it's not the size of the oven
that matters it's what's inside and you
know what's inside this oven a roast a
markiplier roast exactly thanks Matthias
you really are YouTube Genius
this will be the most difficult roast of
my life i knew i had to be in peak
physical condition so I got on my gear
and was ready for training
I knew I would have to harness the power
of the ninja
my name is he Hanate Wakuso Shiseo Tadashite Teriyaki Suzuki Honda Civic
Hello, my name is Bob and today we are going
to be teaching you how to be ninja
First lesson in being a ninja is to be loud
unecesarry sounds when you hit things
Lesson two. You must be able to catch
anything with your chopsticks
ok guys just finished my training and it
is time to roast markiplier first just
got put on some clothes and we'll be
good to go
oh great the powers got to go out right when i'm naked?
what the heck why the heck is this on
Chad? Chad! hello?
Come one! Close!
Hello we're here! Chad! oh shoot my friends are here they can't see me watching this!
come on close! he didn't pick up his phone so...
it won't close close close you stupid
Markiplier window oh and the powers back
on alright! Chad your door was unlocked!
We're in your house we're in your house
oh god not again
get off my screen
Oh my god! wow you were busy! No no no no i'm not
watching this I was trying to close... you ah... what ya doing?
it's not what it looks like
there's no it's not what it looks like
it just looks like your jerking off to
Markiplier videos. No, no guys, no it's not what it looks like!
uh we're here if you want to....
i'm just gonna go get a Mt. Dew.
alright you want anything? Steve likes feet
it's not weird
yeah it's weird. I think it's really weird. OK markiplier I've had enough
Here comes the cupcake!
oh hey Chad! Yes Screen team so glad you guys
answered I need your help
roasting markiplier what why roast
markiplier is awesome because he's awesome!
Because he's trying to steal Vy! Are you kidding me?
well you need to tell him to beat it
that's perfect i'll roast him to beat it
great idea grab your guitar and get roasting
Hey Markiplier, don't you come around here
Don't want to see your face since you shaved off that beard
A fire's on your head
Oh sorry that's just your hair. So Beat it! Just beat it!
You better run because you stole my girlfriend
You're gonna see some blood like when you met Warfstache
you'll have so many cuts call you Mark Edward Scissorhands
So beat it! With this Fischbach Diss Track!
Just Beat it! Beat it! No one wants you, even Chica!
I'm roasting you harder than PewDiePie
Friend-zoning your boyfriend JackSepticEye!
Just Beat It! Beat it! Just Beat it. Beat it!
Bob, Wade and Tyler they always have your back!
you must be bribing them with lots of cheese it snacks
or maybe they're plastered playing drunken minecraft
So beat it! Just beat it!
You are a grown man but you're easily scared
When playing games with an animatronic teddy bear
how's your voice so low when you never grew a pair
so beat it, go become an engineer
Just Beat It, beat it, beat it, beat it,
No one wants you, even Chica!
I'm roasting you harder than Pewdiepie
Friend-zoning your boyfriend JackSepticEye
Just Beat It, beat it, just beat it, beat it,
Oh hey Tyler! Hey Chad what are you up to?
uh... i'm totally not in the middle of roasting
markiplier right now what would make me
wait why would you want to roast mark
because I caught him on a skype call
with Vy trying to date her
oh they were just recorded a video
together for yotube. Wait that was for a
YouTube video
yeah it was fake not everything you see
on youtube is real Chad for instance
this roast you're making right now but
what do you mean not every video on
youtube is real including this roast
video so this whole roast about Markiplier
I was just kidding the whole time?
and markiplier's actually like a super
awesome dude
so everybody who left to dislike already
they just didn't understand that this
was a joke i guess i'm gonna need you
guys to give this video a like to help
counter way all those dislikes from
people who just didn't get that this was
a fake roast...
no no I'm not watching, not watching isn't
it just looks like you're jerking off to Markiplier videos...
Steve's likes feet so...
It's not weird.
um oh let me catch up with you baby
hey uh you know uh show me
this one from the beginning to roll back
oh you don't have the mouse... where did
the mouse go? Where'd the mouse go, Chad?
it's in your ass?