Something that I've learned from Drew Houston the founder and CEO of Dropbox
I think I was like 20 years old and you know, there was a pretty cool brunch to be having.
I'm sitting there with him and I'm asking similar questions and
he told me something that was amazing. He said "The problem people have with dealing with uncertainty, which is
Uncertainty is entrepreneurship"
That's the difference between being an employee and being an entrepreneur is the entrepreneur takes on the uncertainty, right?
Drew said the key that people misunderstand about uncertainty is that you're not born with it.
It's a muscle and
people just assume that because they don't have it, it's not for them.
He said "If you think of uncertainty as a muscle and you train it like a muscle
Things start changing." Let's say you haven't worked out your biceps.
You don't go to the gym and just start lifting the 60 pound dumbbell.
No,
you start with two
And then you just go five and you go ten and then you take, you know, a couple of days off. You have to, you know,
have rest days. If you think of it the way you train a muscle, all of a sudden uncertainty becomes this manageable thing,
Where you start small and you work your way up and something that Drew said, that I love, he said: "When you feel that pain,
that means you're working up a weight class."
That's cool.
And then he said: "When you pull a muscle, like psychologically, if you've taken on so much uncertainty that you're having a panic attack,
You're way too high on your weight class. Tone- it- down a little! It doesn't mean it's not for you
But you know, if you're lit, I've done it, you know, you're lifting weights and you you know pull something
All right, you're gonna go down maybe 10 or 20 pounds the next time you go into the gym
And then you work your way slowly back up
I've learned that insecurities will never leave you.
Just like with fear, they're a natural part of the human condition.
So your goal shouldn't be to rid yourself off of insecurities
It should be to become so aware of them, that they could be yammering away and you go:
"Oh, that's just the insecurities."
Because when they're calling the shots, when they're determining
Determining your actions whether it's your insecurity of "I'm not enough." "I'm worthless." "I'm invisible."
"I'm unlovable."
"People are going to abandon me."
When you're not aware that that's driving your actions
That's when you get yourself into the biggest
biggest disasters of your life. If anyone out there is dealing with an insecurity that they want help, you know growing through ,
the first step is
Getting rid of the shame that surrounds it
because the shame is what traps that insecurity. Think of the insecurity like a bug and the shame is like the
The glass on top of the bug. You can't deal with that bug if there's this guardrail and the thing about shame
Is that shame can only live in secrecy.
The second you speak something out loud
It doesn't have power over you anymore.
And
Even in the writing of this book that was some of the hardest stuff. When I was a kid, I would get bullied and
they would call me like "Fatty Banayan".
First of all, it's still weird to even speak those words out loud,
but the fact, the act of writing it, even the act of saying it, the next time it's gonna be easier and
as soon as it doesn't become a secret anymore, you can start dealing with it.
So anyone who's dealing with an insecurity, whether it's being invisible or not being enough,
Speak it out loud, whether it's in therapy, whether it's with friends or if it's just writing it in your journal
Because only then can you start to deal with it.
What are some of the
Most impressive
Third door moments that you heard from other people,
researching the book?
My favorite is Spielberg's because in many ways Spielberg's third door story embodies so much
of the third door in general and the reason I love it so much is because of how it starts.
He was rejected from the film school, which is bonkers!
You know, it's like Bill Gates being turned down from a computer science class.
You know, Spielberg was rejected from USC film school multiple times
And
He, what I love about him, is that instead of doing what most people would do is think you know
"Maybe I'm not cut out for this", he decided he was gonna take his education into his own hands.
So what he did is he registered for
Cal State Long Beach, which isn't which isn't too far away
and he arranged his classes so he would only be there, you know
Tuesdays and Thursdays and he decided he would find a way to break into Hollywood.
So what he did is and we've been to Universal Studios theme park
so
You know that tram ride like it takes on the backlot so Spielberg when he was 19
Goes to Universal Studios, goes on the tram ride, goes around the back lot,
jumps off the tram, hides in a bathroom, waits for the tram to ride away and starts wandering around the lot.
And, you know, he's popping his head here and there and this older gentleman, his name is Chuck Silvers, stops him
And Chuck Silvers has worked for the Universal Television Library
And,
You know, this 19-year-old kid just starts mumbling saying like, you know, my biggest dream is to be a director
And
They end up actually talking for about an hour and Chuck Silvers goes:
"You want to come back on the lot?" And Spielberg's like "That would be my biggest dream!"
So Chuck Silver's writes him this three day pass and hands it to him.
And Spielberg, you know, comes on day one, day two, day three,
But on day four, he comes back onto the lot, wearing a suit,
holding his dad's briefcase,
walks up to the security entrance, puts the hand in the air and goes
"Hey Scotty!" And Scotty just waves back and he walks right in.
And for months Spielberg would walk back onto the lot and sneak into
Soundstages, go into editing rooms,
Asking actors and actresses and producers out to lunch,
Soaking up as much knowledge as he could.
And again, what I love about is this is a kid who was rejected from film school
and in many ways he created his own film school.
And, you know, he's going around the lot and after a while Chuck Silvers, who became a mentor to him,
Said one of the best piece of advice he could have given
He said: "Steven,
There needs to be a point where you stop schmoozing and you come back with something of quality to show people."
And Spielberg, you know took that hard, you know, we were talking a hard piece of advice
He took that hard piece of advice to heart and he stopped coming to the lot and started creating
this short film called "Amblin" and he spent months editing and even the way he
Produced and got the money for the film is like a third door story in and of itself, but he makes this little short film,
comes back to the lot, shows it to Chuck Silvers
And it's so good that a single tear comes down Chuck Silvers's face.
And Silvers reaches for the phone
and calls up Sid Sheinberg, the vice president of the UniversalTelevision and goes: "Sid, I have something you have to see!"
And you know, this guy's the VP of
Television universally. He's like "Look, there's a lot of things that I need to see." And he goes "No no, no
No, you need to see this right now!" And he goes "You think it's that goddamn important?" He goes: "Yes!
It's that goddamn important. If you don't watch this tonight,
Somebody else will." And the best part of the story is Sid
Sid Sheinberg still was sort of like lukewarm. So Chuck Silvers called... This was back when he had projectionists
Chuck Silvers called the projectionists for Sid Sheinberg's office. And he was like: "Look,
Sid doesn't want to watch this and when he gets to the, you know, the projection room tonight, put this first."
He pretty much put his entire reputation on the line for this young 19 year old Steven Spielberg.
And as soon as Sid Sheinberg watched the movie, he said he wanted to meet Spielberg immediately.
Spielberg ran over, got to the big office and on the spot
He got offered a seven-year contract and that's how he became the youngest director in Hollywood history.
And when I reflect back on this story
You know, there's a million things that worked well
But you know Spielberg had incredible talent
But so do a lot of aspiring directors. What made the difference? And to me it was really like this
People game that he played, you know jumping off the law and meeting different people
But a people game sort of sounds like, you know networking at a career fair.
To me
It was like this Spielberg game
you know jump off the bus, find your inside man and use him or her as your way in.
And really the key is that Inside Man.
Because if you think about it without Chuck Silvers,
One writing that pass
Two, which I think is one of the most important, giving Spielberg that advice that only someone inside of the studio would know to tell
him and then three, which is the ultimate one, putting his reputation on the line
So Spielberg could get his foot in the door,
None of this would have happened.
And to me I've realized every single person doesn't matter if it's Bill Gates, Lady Gaga, Maya Angelou, Steve Wozniak,
They've all had an inside man or woman who's believed in them enough to put the reputation on the line to open that door