*Some random japanese song*
Kirogi: Why are we running?
Meshuga: It's for the opening credits.
Kirogi: I know... but does this scene ever even happen in the actual story?
Yuki: No.
Kirogi: Are we even in Japan right now?
Meshuga: I... honestly don't even know, dude.
*opening continues*
Kirogi: Gosh, how big is this field anyway?
Meshuga: Okay, why do you think we know more than you?
*Kirogi grunting*
Yuki: I'm hungry.
Kirogi: SHUT UP, YUKI!
Every Anime Ever.
Teacher: Alright class, settle down.
Welcome to another year at Kabuchano Hoshi Academy for girls.
Now, you may have noticed a new addition to the class.
Due to an internal error, we accidentally got our only male transfer student ever this year, so please be kind to him.
Guy: Ah, this is really gonna affect my studies.
Sports girl: Ooh, I think he's kinda cute.
Shy girl: A boy? Do you think he likes to read manga like me?
Teacher: Settle down children, as I have more announcements.
The dorms are also overflowing this year, so you will all be sharing one room.
I expect you all to behave.
Guy: Wait, sharing a room with eight girls?
Ugh, this is really gonna affect my studies,
and my video game playing.
Genki girl: Wait, does that mean we can't have our naked pillow fights?
Sports girl: Well I'm not going to stop something THAT fun just because a boy is there.
If he doesn't want to join in, that's his problem.
Teacher: And now for your first assignment: group shower exercise.
Everyone: Yay!
Guy: Ugh, what a predicament.
Should I dye my hair pink, blue, or brighter pink or brighter blue?
*Kirogi grunting in pain*
*bad guys laughing*
Villain 1: Guess all the training in the world couldn't save you from a few bullets.
Villain 2: A pity. I truly expected more from Kuruma's chosen (kuruma means car).
Kirogi: So this is it? Am I... dying?
I've let everyone down- the whole village, mother, father, brother.
I'm sorry.
Wait.
...Brother?
Brother: You should always do your best, even if you just got shot.
Kirogi: He's right.
I can't give up just yet.
*intense music*
Mother, father, brother, everyone. Thank you for believing in me.
I'll never stop fighting again.
Hey, villains, I'm not done with you yet.
Villain 2: Whoa, what? Didn't we just shoot you like, three dozen times? Where are all the bullet holes?
Kirogi: Well, I remembered my brother, and decided I couldn't give up.
Villain 1: So the cure for being shot is... remembering someone?
Kirogi: I- uh...
Yeah, I guess? Yeah, yeah.
Both Villains: Coooool.
Villain 2: Yeah, very fair.
Girl: Do you watch the English dub or the Japanese sub?
Guy: Only true fans watch the sub.
Cat-ears girl: Welcome to the group, new kid. We hope you're ready for danger.
New kid: Mm-hmm. I'm going to do my best.
I made a vow I'll never let the demons hurt anyone again.
Tough guy: Okay guys, we need to discuss how we're gonna take down the Dark One.
Cat-ears: Well, tomorrow's the Blood Moon, so it's now or never.
Squidcat: We've come too far to give up now!
Ika neko (literally squid cat)
*screaming*
New kid: Oh my God!
What the hell is that thing?
Cat-ears: That Squidcat. He's our little buddy who helps-
New kid: OH MY GOD! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? THAT ISN'T NORMAL.
GET IT AWAY, GET IT AWAY!
Tough guy: So, uh, yeah what actually are you, Squidcat?
Squidcat: Oh me? *laughs* Well I'm just, Squidcat!
*giggles*
*ika neko*
Oh, Pikachu! We're an anime too technically, right?
*bell rings*
Makoto: Oh! Uh, Takashi!
Takashi: Yes, Makoto?
M: Well, I've seen the way you look at me in class,
And I was wondering if you'd like to go to prom with me?
T: Of course I'll go with you.
M: Oh.. great!
T: Woah. Hey, what are you doing?
M: Well, we clearly have feelings for each other, as we've so overtly hinted at for the past three seasons.
T: Yes, we can *hint* at a secret desire for each other and let the Internet create all the fan fictions they want,
But here, gay male characters can never be shown in anything more than an embrace.
And the only time we can show something overtly gay, it has to be for comedic relief,
Like that guy over there.
Gay guy: OOOOOOO, I'm GAAAYYYY!
M: Hah, come on, Takashi. There's definitely anime that show a gay male relationship.
T: Name one anime where two men kiss.
*Makoto is buffering*
T: That isn't hentai.
*loading answer*
M: Oh! Yuri On Ice.
T: Nope.
They just... hugged.
M: AahHh.
But I don't get it. Everyone is down with the gays now.
How can anime be so far behind every other form of media when it comes to portraying gay relationships?
T: Well, that's a very good question, Makoto. Very good indeed.
GG: I'm gaaaaayyyy
Every Anime Ever.
Courtney: Hey guys, thanks so much for watching!
If you wanna watch "If TV Shows Were Anime", hit that box on the left.
Pikachu!
Shayne: Yeah...
Also big shout out to all the animators who helped make this.
Their info is in the description below.
And click that box on the right to watch "If People Were Anime 2".
Courtney: Why are you making fun of me?
Shayne: Courtney is... Courtney: You're wearing a yellow shirt like Pikachu.